A Parent’s Guide to Drug Smells and Odors

If you think your child might be using drugs, certain smells can help you know for sure. Some substances have distinctive odors. You’re probably already familiar with a few, like alcohol or cigarette smoke. But some of the most dangerous drugs, like meth and PCP, can be harder to identify. This guide will teach you to recognize the smells of several different drugs and help you decide what to do next.

Common Drug Smells and Odors

Drugs can leave lingering odors in your child’s room, in their car, or on their clothes. You might also associate a strong smell with certain behaviors. Does your teen smell different every time they come home from band practice? Or, do they seem more irritable whenever they smell a certain way? 

Once you recognize the smell of drugs, you can get your teen the help they need. But first, it’s important to know what you’re dealing with. And wrong assumptions can make matters worse. Even the best treatment for alcohol abuse might not help your teen recover from meth addiction.

Marijuana

There are many strains of marijuana, and each one smells a little different. But most weed smells “skunky,”1 with distinctive sour, earthy notes. Some describe it as smelling like burnt rope.2 It can also smell light or even citrusy, depending on the varietal. 

Synthetic Cannabinoids

A growing number of U.S. states are legalizing marijuana. As that trend continues, scientists develop more and more synthetic versions of the drug. K2, or spice, is one of these. While K2 isn’t meant for human consumption,3 some people ingest it anyway. Some say that spice smells a lot like marijuana. 

However, other synthetic cannabinoids may smell different.4 One study found that several of these drugs smelled like naphthalene, an ingredient in mothballs. As more synthetic cannabinoids come on the market, it’s hard to predict exactly how each of them will smell. 

If your child is abusing any of these cannabis products, it may be time to research marijuana rehab centers.

PCP

Phencyclidine, more commonly called PCP or angel dust, is a dangerous dissociative.5 This drug is infamous for its more severe side effects, which include paranoia and physical violence. It can even be fatal. 

PCP normally appears as a powder, pill, or liquid. These inert forms of the drug are odorless.6 However, you can smoke PCP by adding the powder to any plant, including marijuana, tobacco, or even herbs like mint. 

The smoke from PCP smells like ammonia. If you find this strong chemical smell on your child’s clothes or belongings, they may be using the drug. But if you notice a characteristic PCP smell coming from an entire home or building, you may be close to a lab that manufactures it on a larger scale. 

Crack Cocaine

Crack cocaine, or crack, is a more potent form of cocaine.7 Both of these drugs are stimulants, and they have an immediate effect on circulation. Your heart beats faster, but your blood vessels get smaller. In extreme cases, this can cause seizures or heart attacks. 

Cocaine is a white powder, and usually odorless. Crack cocaine, however, appears in the form of a rock or crystal, and it has a distinctive smell when smoked. Many people report that crack smells like burnt plastic.8 

Meth

Methamphetamine, or meth, is an extremely powerful stimulant.9 This drug is most common in rural towns, and it can wreak havoc on entire communities. Most of the time, people manufacture it in illegal at-home labs. Because meth includes such volatile chemicals, these labs can easily catch fire or even explode.

Like other synthetic drugs, including crack cocaine, meth emits a strong chemical smell.10 Some compare it to ammonia or burning plastic. If your child smokes meth regularly, or in large quantities, their sweat may start to smell the same way.

Experts say that meth is a “community disease.”11 Even more than other drugs, it affects entire social groups. As a result, your child may need a change of scenery to fully recover. If you’re noticing a meth smell in your home, you can look into meth rehab centers that treat teens.

Recognizing Drug Paraphernalia

Not everyone is an expert drug smell detector. And even if you are, your teen might be very good at hiding their substance use. They could also be using odorless drugs, like prescription pills. 

If you can’t smell drugs, but you’re still concerned about your child’s behavior, you can keep an eye out for common drug paraphernalia.12 Any of these items may smell like their associated drugs.

Marijuana and Cannabinoid Paraphernalia

  • Glass, metal, or wooden pipes
  • Bongs
  • DIY pipes, such as a pipe carved out of an apple or a Coke can with a puncture in the side
  • Prescription pill bottles with or without printed labels, which can be used to store marijuana
  • Herb grinders
  • Lighters
  • Cigarette rolling papers or blunt wraps
  • Vape pens
  • Bottles of vape juice
  • Blowtorches
  • Lighters
  • Shallow dishes or trays with drug residue

PCP Paraphernalia

  • Dark-colored cigarettes
  • Cigarette rolling papers
  • Bags of plant matter, such as marijuana or non-psychoactive herbs
  • Glass or metal pipes
  • Bongs
  • Lighters

Cocaine and Crack Cocaine Paraphernalia

  • Glass pipes
  • Lighters
  • Small spoons, keys, or other objects that can fit inside a nostril
  • Small plastic bags
  • Small glass or plastic bottles with screw tops
  • Rolled bills or straws that have been cut down
  • Credit cards, ID cards, or razor blades with white residue
  • Small mirrors or plates with white residue or scratch marks

Because cocaine normally doesn’t have a smell, it can be harder to detect than smokable drugs. If you’re worried your child is snorting the powdered version, you can learn how to tell if someone is using cocaine

Meth Paraphernalia

  • Glass pipes
  • Spoons
  • Tinfoil
  • Lighters

Injectable Drug Paraphernalia

Some people inject drugs like meth, crack cocaine, and PCP. However, heroin is the most common injectable drug.13 No matter which substance a person is injecting, they’ll probably use similar paraphernalia:

  • Syringes
  • Metal spoons or cookers14 (small metal containers used for heating drugs over a flame)
  • Lighters
  • Items that can be used as tourniquets,15 including elastic strips, belts, neckties, and similar

Injecting drugs16 is one of the most dangerous ways to take them. It substantially increases the risk of infectious diseases, including HIV and hepatitis. If you suspect your teen is injecting drugs, they may need immediate professional support. To get them the help they need, you can start by researching heroin rehab centers

Signs and Symptoms of Drug Use

Addiction causes behavioral changes17—but so does adolescence. It can be hard to tell the difference between normal teen development and more serious problems. According to experts, there are a few warning signs that your child might need help: 

  1. Their demeanor changes suddenly.
  2. Multiple signs of addiction appear at the same time. 
  3. Their behavior is extreme. 

But what specific signs should you look for? You can keep your child safe by watching out for these symptoms of substance abuse:18

  • Frequently changing friend groups
  • Regularly staying out after their curfew
  • Lying about where they’ve been
  • Making transparent excuses for bad behavior
  • Pulling back from family activities
  • Disrespecting authority figures such as parents, teachers, or other adults
  • Academic problems
  • Changes in appearance
  • Poor oral hygiene
  • Bloodshot eyes, dilated pupils, or pinpoint pupils
  • Unexplained weight gain or loss
  • Uncharacteristic or unprovoked anger
  • Poor judgment
  • Irritability
  • Depression
  • Mood swings
  • Drastic changes to sleep habits

Identifying Drug Smells in the Home

When you want to keep your child safe, asking “What do drugs smell like?” can be a good first step. But smells can be deceiving. If you think you’re smelling drugs, you should gather more information before confronting your child.

First, consider the context in which you’re noticing the smell: 

  • Is the smell coming from your child’s bedroom, the clothes they’re wearing, their body, or somewhere else? 
  • Do you only notice it at certain times of the day? 
  • Does your child act differently when they smell that way? 

Use your answers to make a plan of action. For example, if you notice the smell in their bedroom, you might want to take a look around while they’re out of the house. Or if the smell only happens late at night, you can check in on them around that time to make sure they’re okay. 

Looking for Drugs in Your Home

If you think your teen may be keeping substances in your home, you should be aware of a few common hiding spots for drugs:19

  • Electronics with closed compartments (calculators, game consoles, alarm clocks, etc.)
  • Highlighters or pens with caps
  • Candy wrappers or snack containers
  • Heating vents
  • Stuffed animals
  • Car interiors, especially any hidden compartments

Some retailers also sell disguised stash containers, which look like other objects. For example, your teen might have a smell-proof container that looks exactly like a can of soda. 

Addressing Drug Use With Your Child

Every behavior—even dangerous behavior—serves a purpose. If your child’s using drugs, there’s a reason for it. But they might not know what that reason is. Maybe they’re trying to self-medicate mental health issues, impress their friends, or just get your attention. Whatever need they’re trying to meet, you can help them address it in a more effective way. 

In many cases, the next step is to talk to your child about their behavior. You can also get the help of a therapist or addiction specialist, or even stage an intervention. Whatever you decide, take your time to prepare for this conversation. Go into it with a plan for what you’ll say, and clear goals for the future. 

The most important thing is opening communication with your child, and letting them know you’re on their side. Try to avoid blaming them or punishing them for their behavior. Instead, focus on giving them more support. This could mean that you set stronger boundaries, or take away privileges like staying out after a certain time. You can also look for more sustainable ways to meet their emotional needs. For example, you might suggest a weekly family hike or movie night. 

If your child is abusing drugs, they may need professional mental health treatment. It’s best to start researching treatment programs before it becomes an emergency. You can also reach out to rehab programs to ask for their expert advice. 

Prevention and Education

Whether or not your child is using drugs, there are things you can do to keep them safe. Experts have identified certain risk factors for drug use among teens:20

  • Conflict with parents
  • Inconsistent, harsh, or lacking discipline
  • Substance use by parents or siblings
  • Physical abuse
  • Lack of supervision
  • Academic problems

Addressing these issues can lower your child’s risk of substance abuse. You can also teach them about addiction, and what to do if they encounter drug use. For example, you can encourage them to call you for a ride home if any of their friends offer them drugs. 

Seeking Professional Assistance

Data suggests that instead of talking to their parents, teens confide in other adults21 more readily. In addition to offering them emotional support, you can connect them with a larger community of people. That could include trusted friends, extended family, and mental health providers. 

You can choose the right type of healthcare professional based on your family’s needs. These experts can help in a variety of ways: 

  • Offering a safe space in which teens can talk about their feelings
  • Diagnosing underlying mental health issues
  • Prescribing non-addictive medications 
  • Recommending specific types of long-term treatment
  • Facilitating communication between family members
  • Educating parents on how to best support teenagers

Addiction and mental health treatment are different for everyone. Your child might benefit from seeing a talk therapist, psychiatrist, social worker, or other specialist. In most rehab programs—including inpatient and outpatient centers—they’ll get coordinated care from a team of experts. 

While treatment will focus on your child, it often includes the whole family. You might attend group therapy sessions or just receive updates about their progress. Their care team will probably also suggest ways to improve your whole family’s dynamic. 

Supporting Your Child’s Well-Being

If you discover that your child is using drugs, it’s a sign that something has to change. Going forward, they’ll probably need new kinds of support. That could mean going to rehab, switching schools, or something else entirely. In any event, this might be the start of a turbulent time. 

As your child makes this transition, look for ways to provide stability: 

  • Communicate openly. Foster a supportive home environment by talking to your child about their feelings. You can also share your own experience in a gentle, loving way.
  • Set clear boundaries and expectations. Reward their progress and provide consistent discipline. 
  • Connect with the other people in their support network. This may include therapists, teachers, friends, or extended family. Work as a team to support your child’s ongoing recovery.
  • Set a positive example. Children with parents who abuse substances,22 including alcohol, have a higher risk of addiction. 
  • Look for ways to have fun. Finding joy is an essential part of recovery. Encourage your child to try new hobbies they might find meaningful. You can also plan regular activities as a family.

Remember that your child isn’t the only one going through a major life change. Their journey affects you and your whole family. Make sure you get the support you need, too. You might see a 1:1 therapist, lean on trusted friends, or just take time for yourself. 

Practicing self-care has several benefits. First, you’ll ensure that you have the emotional bandwidth to help your child face whatever challenges arise. You’ll also show your child that it’s okay to ask for help when they need it. 

Moving Forward Together

If you’re concerned that your child might be doing drugs, there are a few steps you can take to keep them safe: 

  • Learn how to detect drug smells in your home or on your child’s clothes.
  • Check for drug paraphernalia, making sure to look in common hiding places.
  • Talk to your child about drug use.
  • Get expert advice from mental health professionals. 

Parenting is a constant learning process. And the more you know about substance abuse, the more tools you’ll have to help your child. If they need professional support, you can always connect with a rehab program for teens.


Frequently Asked Questions About Drug Smells and Odors

What does meth smell like?

Methamphetamine, or meth, emits a strong chemical smell resembling ammonia or burning plastic. Recognizing this distinct odor can help identify potential methamphetamine use.

What does fentanyl smell like?

Fentanyl, a powerful synthetic opioid, lacks a distinctive smell. It’s generally odorless, making it hard to detect based on smell alone. However, recognizing other signs and symptoms of fentanyl use is crucial.

What drug smells like burnt plastic?

Crack cocaine is often associated with a smell similar to burnt plastic. This distinct odor is a characteristic of crack cocaine when smoked. Recognizing this smell can help identify possible crack cocaine use.

9 Ways To Help Someone With An Addiction

If your loved one is addicted to drugs or alcohol, you can make an impact in their life by supporting their recovery journey. Being a positive support for your loved one can help them navigate the transition to treatment, and life afterwards. If the addicted person doesn’t have a strong support network, they could easily fall back to old patterns. You can be that powerful motivator.

There are resources available to help work through addiction at all stages of rehabilitation. You can start the journey by finding addiction treatment to start the healing process today.

What To Do: How to Help Someone With an Addiction

Here are 9 ways you can help a loved one who’s struggling with addiction.

1. Educate Yourself

Addiction is not necessarily “curable,” but with understanding and guidance, it is possible to successfully manage the ups and downs of it. Education is key for family and loved ones to provide the best support to those affected by addiction. Empowering yourself through knowledge helps you through the recovery process.

The Biology of Addiction

When you take drugs, they interrupt how neurotransmitters communicate in the brain1. Addiction begins when your brain produces less of its natural neurotransmitters due to high, constant drug use. You can build up a tolerance and need to take more of the substance. At first, using drugs or drinking alcohol is a choice, but it can soon spiral out of control.

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Eventually, some neurotransmitter networks and areas of the brain become damaged from the constant disruption. Because of this, addiction changes your brain chemistry, so many scientists believe that it is a disease. In some ways, you can look at addiction like cancer or diabetes. It’s an ongoing disease that, luckily, can be treatable. As the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) thoughtfully puts it, “addiction is a disease, not a character flaw2.”

2. Recognize The Signs of Relapse

Just like other diseases, relapse is always possible. So, being aware of warning signs is crucial. Everyone’s triggers are different, but common ones include stress and trauma. 

If your loved one is about to relapse, you might notice them fudging the truth, keeping secrets, or lying about their whereabouts. They could also show other changes in behavior such as:

  • Being withdrawn or distant
  • Showing a loss of interest in activities they like
  • Displaying mood swings

If you notice this, you may want to start gathering resources for help and talk to a professional. 

3. Listen

Be compassionate with your loved one. Ask them questions about why they drink or use drugs. And speak without judgment. Getting them to trust you with this vulnerable information is the first step towards getting them the help they need.

3A. Be open-minded: Ask questions that can help your loved one reflect on their addiction and their progress. Don’t judge the person or their decisions. Show that you are open to different approaches and solutions.

4. Be Patient

This process can be a great opportunity to show your loved one how much you care. Being patient and empathetic throughout their recovery journey will help them through difficult times and be greatly appreciated. Let the person know that you care and understand what they are going through. Your presence and support will be invaluable to them.

5. Vocalize Your Support

Sometimes, we think actions speak louder than words, but voicing your support of this journey is so important. Just saying, “I love you, and we’re going to get through this together” can encourage your loved one during a confusing and difficult time. Here are some more supportive phrases for recovery:

1. “I’m here for you no matter what.”

2. “I’m proud of you for seeking help.”

3. “I believe in you.”

4. “I’m here to help.”

5. “You can do this.”

Words of Support and Encouragement for Your Loved One During Their Recovery Journey.

6. Set Healthy Boundaries

Prioritize yourself and your wellbeing while helping your loved one. It is a difficult process, so remember to take a break when needed. It’s okay if you are unable to be involved in every aspect of their healing. If a situation becomes heated, consider setting a boundary such as taking a break from the conversation to reflect and come back to it in a more peaceful mindset. 

7. Have Realistic Expectations

Change doesn’t happen overnight. Be patient and supportive of your family member/friend’s journey of recovery. Celebrate each step of progress they make and encourage them to keep going. Don’t expect instant results, as change takes time and effort. Remind them that with perseverance, anything is possible. Be their source of hope and strength.

8. Offer resources

Suggest helpful resources or support groups that may be beneficial. Your loved one may want to look into different groups like Alcoholics/Narcotics Anonymous3, Women for Sobriety4, or SMART Recovery5. They can also explore our resource center with different articles to learn more about their condition or recovery in general.

9. Research Treatment and Recovery Resources

One of the biggest ways you can help your loved one is by getting them professional treatment. Rehab, outpatient programs, and/or therapy all teach clients the tools they need to regulate their emotions and behaviors to reinforce their sobriety. 

What Not To Do:

This is a sensitive time, and there are some things you might want to avoid to keep the recovery journey on track.

1. Don’t Enable

While you want to support your loved one, there’s a fine line between support and enabling. Don’t give your loved one money or a place to stay if their predicament results from drug use. Don’t tolerate negative behavior. And don’t rescue them every time they mess up. Instead, hold them accountable and practice tough love.

2. Don’t Blame Yourself or Them

Many factors go into how addiction forms, and you could end up wasting a lot of energy trying to pinpoint the cause. Instead, you can focus on taking action and moving forward to overcome this struggle.

3. Don’t Force Them To Quit

If your loved one feels like they can’t trust you because you demand they quit, that could make matters worse. They might start sneaking around or lying about their actions. And the less you know about their addiction, the less likely you’ll know how to help.

Offer to help them, but don’t demand sobriety immediately.

4. Don’t Ignore The Problem

Pretending an issue doesn’t exist doesn’t make it go away, especially for addiction. By ignoring it, you’re enabling it. You can take concrete steps to better your loved one’s life.

Find a Treatment Program For Addiction

So your loved one admits they need help, now what?

Doing some research to find the best kind of treatment for their needs is a great start. 

A good, and often necessary, first step in the healing journey is detox. Medically monitored detox safely rids your body of drugs and alcohol and can help you feel clear minded and ready to tackle treatment.

Many people then need residential rehab to overcome their addiction. Residential care can help them replace their unhealthy coping mechanism, substances, with positive habits. They’ll learn new techniques with therapies like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to be well equipped to face the uncomfortable feelings that come with addiction recovery. And they’ll likely engage in holistic activities like yoga for well-rounded healing.

If you’re a family member, you may want to look into a program that offers family therapy. Usually, you’ll work with a therapist and your loved one. Or, they might offer a family weekend for on-site visits. Another key component of family therapy is addiction education. You’ll learn more about the addiction and recovery process, so post-treatment your loved one will have a healthy environment to come home to.

Post-residential care, sober living homes offer more flexibility while providing a comfortable place for your loved one to focus on their sobriety. They’ll likely attend an outpatient program, go to work or school, and grow with other peers in recovery. This is especially great for those who need a stable environment to heal in.

Recovery starts with a single step. You can make an impact in your loved one’s life by reaching out to addiction treatment centers.

The Signs of Drug Use in Teens

Drug use in teens is an increasing problem in the U.S. It’s important to recognize the signs of drug use in order to intervene and help teens struggling with addiction. Common signs of drug use in teens include changes in behavior, including mood swings, attitudes, and school performance. Additionally, physical signs can include red eyes, changes in sleep patterns, and changes in physical appearance. Finally, teens with drug addiction may show signs of financial or legal trouble, including stealing money or getting into trouble with the law.

If your child is using drugs, this recovery journey you’re about to embark on can not only help your teen, but it can also make your whole family grow closer. Getting teen treatment can set your child on the path to success. 

Signs, Symptoms, and Behaviors of Drug Use in Teens

If you know what to look for, you can discover if your teen is using drugs or drinking alcohol. Be on the lookout for these signs:

Changes in mood:

  • Irritable
  • Withdrawn
  • Unable to focus
  • Depressed or hyperactive

Changes in appearance:

  • Unkempt appearance
  • Bloodshot eyes
  • Flushed cheeks

Changes in behavior:

  • Sneaking out
  • Secretive about their phone or their whereabouts
  • Missing school or work
  • Hanging out with a new crowd of friends

How to Spot Drug Use in Teens

If you have a hunch your kid is using drugs, but you want to be sure, there are some things you can do to get a better idea of the situation:

  • Have eye contact conversations, and see if their eyes are bloodshot.
  • Smell for smoke.
  • Pay attention to their emotional state, this may be out of the norm.
  • Go through their belongings: This can be a sensitive topic. Giving your children the privacy they deserve is important, but if you are concerned about your teen’s safety and well being due to possible drug use, you may want to consider this option.

Teen Drug Use Statistics

 According to the National Institute on Drug Use, since the start of COVID-19, reported drug use has decreased1. This is likely due to school closure and social distancing (i.e. less peer pressure). Luckily, the downward trend has continued through the last couple of years; however, substance use still poses a threat.

The Most Commonly Used Drugs Amongst Teens

The most commonly used drugs reported in 2022 were nicotine/vaping, cannabis/marijuana, and alcohol. (Keep in mind that these are only the reported statistics. More teens likely use these substances and just don’t report it.)

  • 20.5% of 10th graders vaped
  • 19.5% of 10th graders ingested cannabis
  • 15.2% – 31.3% of 10th graders drank alcohol

While this downward trend provides some hope, research findings show dramatic and rising death rates in youth between the ages of 14-18. 

Also, it’s important to know that fentanyl, amongst other dangerous players, has contaminated the U.S. and worldwide drug supply2. This substance is extremely potent, meaning even the tiniest drop can make the user overdose. Fentanyl could be found in drugs like cocaine, MDMA (ecstasy), and heroin because it’s cheaper to cut these drugs with fentanyl than sell the pure substance.

Educating yourself on these dangers, and knowing how to help your child, is crucial for prevention, awareness, and recovery if/when needed.

Reasons Why Teens Use Drugs

Each teen has their reasons for using drugs. Here are some common factors that can push them to experiment.

  1. Peer Pressure: Being a teenager is hard, and they just want to fit in with their peers. If their best friend, or someone they admire, offers them drugs or alcohol, they’ll likely take it to feel accepted. 
  2. Media: TV shows, movies, and especially social media nowadays can show drug use as glamorous, normal, or fun. This can appeal to impressionable teens.
  3. Self-Medication: Mental health issues start to pop up around adolescence, and some teens may see the escape of drugs as a way to avoid these complex feelings.
  4. Experimentation: Teens are curious and ready to try new things, especially as they start to gain some freedom.
  5. To Feel Grown Up: Wanting to be a grownup and assert their independence can lead them to drinking or doing drugs.

Find Help for Teen Drug Use

So you’ve had the conversation with your teen about their drug or alcohol use. Now is the time to start gathering resources on how to help them.

  1. Gather Information: Begin by browsing programs for teens. Think through what you want to get out of this experience—for your child and your family. You may want to look for gender-specific care. These programs address hardships that boys and girls uniquely experience by giving them tools to face uncomfortable emotions and experiences. Gender-specific care also helps them focus on treatment without distractions. 
  1. Engage in Family Therapy: Family therapy will likely be an important part of the recovery process, for your teen and your whole family. Addiction education for loved ones is usually offered with this, as well. This gives clarity on your teen’s journey with substances and recovery. So when your child comes home after treatment, everyone will have the skills they need to maintain a healthy recovery environment.
  1. Be Supportive: Most importantly, be a rock for your child. They’re likely going through a confusing time, so having your support will make this process easier and improve their chances of success.
  1. Make Sure You Have Support: Give yourself grace through this journey. Helping your child through addiction recovery can be emotionally draining. You will have support from medical professionals, but other family members or friends can also provide support in this process. 

4A. Remember to prioritize your own self-care. Engage in activities that bring you joy and practice stress-reducing techniques.
As your kids grow older and start making their own decisions, you can act as a compassionate guide and lead by example. What you do from here on out is what matters most. A bright future awaits for your child with the right teen treatment.

find help for teen drug use

Is My Loved One Using Cocaine? How to Tell If Someone Is Using Cocaine

Cocaine doesn’t have to control your loved one. The first step to their recovery might be recognizing signs of use, and then you can help them find a rehab for cocaine addiction

You both have resources for recovery. But the more you know about cocaine use, and how to spot it, can help you help the ones you love. 

How to Spot Cocaine Use

Spotting cocaine use can be tricky. It has a seemingly endless list of slang names and pseudo-identities, making it hard to decipher what your loved one might be talking about. They could hide their behavior with more than sneaky names, too. But there are signs to look for1

Physical Signs

  • Dilated pupils
  • Lack of appetite—it might seem like they barely eat
  • Rapid weight loss
  • Poor sleep
  • Disheveled appearance, lack of hygiene 

Emotional And Mental Signs

  • Paranoid without reason
  • Hyperactivity—“bouncing off the walls”
  • Irritability
  • Anxious, more so than usual 
  • Extreme startle reactions, like jumping at the sound of a cabinet shutting

Along with knowing the signs of cocaine use, you can also familiarize yourself with the street names for cocaine.

Slang Names for Cocaine

The nicknames for cocaine2 might surprise you. They’re creative, to put it positively. And they change based on the form of cocaine (crack, regular cocaine) and what it’s mixed with. 

There’s a lot to keep track of, but knowing even just a few can help.

  • Snow
  • Stardust
  • Stash
  • Bouncing Powder
  • Coke
  • Coca
  • Flake
  • Devil’s Dandruff
  • Florida Snow
  • Joy Flakes

You can also educate yourself on cocaine itself, and how it affects the mind and body.

What Is Cocaine?

Cocaine comes from the leaves of the coca plant1. It grows in South America. From there, it’s smuggled all across the globe.

Cocaine causes a rush of euphoria3, which can last 2-20 minutes. This rush comes from a build up of dopamine in the brain—dopamine stacks up on the transmitters meant to receive it4, causing an intense flood of pleasure. 

Neurotransmitters like dopamine jump between nerves and target cells. If the receptors aren’t working, all the received dopamine has nowhere to go—causing the high. Altering the usual transmission of dopamine can actually change the structure and function of your brain over time. 

The crash, or comedown, from this high can quickly prompt a redose, sometimes until supplies or money run out. This is considered a binge1.

You can ingest cocaine in multiple ways1. Some snort the white powder up their nose. Or, you might mix it with water and inject the mixture into a vein, using a syringe. If it’s crack cocaine, you can smoke it.

Is There a Difference Between Cocaine and Crack?

Chemically, no. Cocaine and crack are the same thing5, just in different forms. Crack isn’t any cheaper, either6. But it is more potent, easy to ingest, and wildly addictive.

Crack looks like rocks, or crystals. It’s a smokeable version of cocaine5, derived from the same coca plant as cocaine. 

For crack cocaine, you might see some of these slang terms:

  • Rock
  • Moon Rock
  • Apple Jack
  • Dice
  • Sleet
  • Yahoo
  • Yale
  • Top Gun
  • Base, Basing

Mucous membranes absorb cocaine and crack cocaine7. You have a huge plane of mucous membrane in your lungs—the alveoli responsible for bringing oxygen to your blood. The inhaled crack smoke absorbs into the alveoli in the lungs rapidly, causing a nearly immediate high.

A crack cocaine high fades faster, though. To avoid the crash, people might keep smoking until they run out of crack. And the more they ingest, the more likely they are to overdose and have negative long-term effects8

The Effects of Cocaine Use

Cocaine use can lead to heart problems8, like cardiac arrest and strokes. Inhaling it as crack can cause respiratory conditions. Snorting it could completely degrade your nasal passage over time. 

Short-term, the effects of cocaine could range from paranoia to seizures9. And rarely, cocaine can cause sudden death after just one use. 

Repeated use takes up more and more money and time. And the more it’s used, the more your brain changes. Addiction and tolerance to the drug can set in quickly1

Cocaine use can also have unpredictable effects, usually caused by what it’s been cut with. The cutting agent could be harmless, but that’s not always the case.

What Is Cocaine Cut With?

Dealers may cut cocaine to up their profit10, selling a “watered down” version to unsuspecting buyers. Powder cocaine could be cut with baking soda, caffeine, sugars, or anesthetics. Visually, you’d likely never know it wasn’t pure cocaine.

But cocaine could have harmful additives. Levamisole, a veterinary drug that kills parasites10, has made its way into 70% of cocaine in America. It causes necrosis11, which kills and rots the skin. 

You can also mix cocaine with other drugs for new, sometimes preferred, effects.

Cocaine Mixtures

Users seeking a different high mix cocaine with other substances, like marijuana and tobacco. Nicknames for these mixtures include Woo-Woo, Woolies, Candy Flipping, Cocoa Puffs, and Boy-Girl.

Certain blends, like alcohol and cocaine, are notably more dangerous. Cocaine and alcohol react12 and form a heart-toxic chemical, cocaethylene. Heroin and cocaine mix to form a speedball9, or an opiate and depressant blend. But cocaine wears off faster than heroin, potentially slowing your breathing to null as the full sedative effect of heroin hits.

No mixture is predictable, or safe. Neither is cocaine by itself. But, for single and blended use, you can find recovery

Treatment for Cocaine Addiction

Cocaine addiction often requires a multi-pronged approach—detox, therapy, and medications13. And the more research scientists do, the better these options become. There’s even a cocaine vaccine in the works14

Your loved one will most likely need to detox from cocaine in a safe, clinically monitored setting. There, they’ll have constant supervision, comfort medications, and begin the therapeutic healing process. This could be at a detox center or a residential rehab with on-site detox

Once cocaine has left their system, inner healing work can begin.

Therapy for Addiction

Therapy can address and heal the causing factors of addiction. It can also motivate and empower your loved one to commit to their recovery, even when it gets hard. 

Behavioral therapies like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can challenge unhelpful thoughts and beliefs15. You’ll learn to shift your perspective of yourself to one that’s more positive. Rather than thinking “I’ll never get better”, CBT would challenge the thought with “Why not?”.

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT)16 addresses black-and-white thinking. Your loved one can accept the problem of cocaine use and know they can get better. DBT can help with relapse too, as it helps patients identify unhelpful thoughts that could lead back to old coping mechanisms. 

The 12 Steps

The 12-Step program offers a place for members to connect and recover in a respected treatment program. Members follow 12 steps together, learning responsibility, accountability, and forgiveness. And the 12 Steps can run in and out of treatment—you don’t have to be in rehab to find a local group to attend. 

The 12 Steps are often called AA (alcoholics anonymous) meetings. For cocaine use, you’ll likely see them called CA (cocaine anonymous). Each uses 12-Step practices to help members stay accountable and sober.

Aftercare

Contingency management (CM) can inspire greater dedication, during and after residential treatment. CM programs usually give out money, snacks, or vouchers as a reward13. And since you’ll actually get a reward for staying sober, attending recovery meetings, and going to treatment, you might find yourself more motivated to do it. 

Your loved one can also keep attending 12-Step meetings as a form of aftercare. If they go to a residential rehab, they might have the opportunity to attend alumni groups, too. 

Continued therapy and medications, if prescribed, can both contribute to long-term success. That’s why they’re both common forms of aftercare for cocaine addiction. If your loved one goes to rehab, they might offer continued 1:1 therapy with the same therapist. If not, they’ll likely connect you to further therapy as part of their discharge service.

Find Power Through Recovery

If you think your loved one is using cocaine, know that they, and yourself, have recovery resources. They can find new power and hope through recovery—addiction isn’t the end. 

You can browse our list of rehabs for cocaine to see pricing, reviews, insurance, and photos of each facility. 


Family members, you can check out these support groups: Co-Anon, Families Anonymous, and Stronger Together.

What to Do When Your Loved One Goes to Rehab

When you love someone with addiction or mental health issues, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. You might feel like you’re stuck in a loop, waiting for them to get the help they need. And when it’s hard to keep things stable right now, it’s even harder to plan for the future.

When a loved one decides to go to residential rehab, it might provide some relief, but you might also feel stressed about how to support them through this new stage of recovery. Here are some ways you can care for them, and for yourself, throughout the treatment process.

Help Them Choose a Rehab Program

Choosing a treatment center is a big decision. And after your loved one commits to getting help, it’s important for them to keep up momentum. You can support this process by doing research with them, and helping them consider their options. This might also help you feel better about the journey they’re embarking on.

1. Explore different types of rehabs. With so many types, locations, specializations, and more, there’s a lot to consider. You can start by learning about different kinds of treatment. While there are countless ways to heal, a few approaches are especially popular:

  • 12-Step rehab
  • Non-12-Step alternatives
  • Holistic addiction treatment
  • Evidence-based rehab
  • Destination rehabs
  • Treatment for co-occurring disorders

2. Encourage them to get an expert opinion. You shouldn’t be solely responsible for finding them the perfect program. And a medical professional can recommend types of addiction treatment that will work for their lifestyle, condition, and other needs.

3. Consider important parts of your loved one’s identity.

Educate Yourself on Addiction Recovery

1. Learn about their addiction or mental health issues, so you have a better understanding of what they’ve been going through. This can help you empathize with your loved one, and validate your complex feelings. If they don’t have a diagnosis yet, you may have to wait for an expert opinion before you can learn more.

2. Get a sense of what happens in rehab. If you’re already informed, there are aspects of treatment your loved one won’t have to explain. This can make it easier for them to tell you about their experience.

Help Them Plan Travel Logistics

1. Travel with them, or help them find a sober companion. It can be dangerous to travel to rehab alone. If you can’t accompany them, talk to their rehab center about other options. A lot of programs will help them make travel plans, and even give them a ride from the airport.

2. Help them pack. You can use this packing list as a starting place.

3. Keep an eye out for unhealthy behaviors like self-harm or binging. Remember, you’re not entirely responsible for keeping them safe. If you have questions or concerns, you can always reach out to their treatment center or primary care physician to get help.

Offer Ground Support, Within Reason

While in rehab, their primary focus will be on recovery. So they’ll need help with things like childcare, paying bills, and other responsibilities. It’s not your job to keep everything afloat for them—even if you’re their partner. But if you want to be part of their support network, there are several ways to help. You can either take these tasks on yourself, or help your loved one find someone else to share the load.

1. Help them set up automatic payments for basic utilities, student loans, etc. so they don’t fall behind on their bills while they’re in treatment.

2. Find child or pet care in their area. Caring for someone else’s dependents is a big responsibility. And it doesn’t have to be your job. But, if you can, you might help them find another trustworthy caregiver. This can give them valuable peace of mind. And during rehab, they can stay focused on getting well.

3. Check in on their house, or help them find someone who can.

4. Clean their home before they return. You can also hire a cleaning service.

Take Care of Yourself While They’re in Treatment

Addiction takes a toll on loved ones and families. And it can be stressful to support your loved one through the early stages of recovery. While your focus may be entirely on their well-being, it’s equally important to take care of yourself.

1. See a 1:1 therapist, ideally someone that specializes in addiction. Or even better, find someone who specializes in working with loved ones of a person with addiction.

2. Set boundaries with your loved one. Remember that your needs matter, too. And when you care for yourself, you have more energy to support the people around you. Codependency can be an issue in relationships that involve addiction, so be aware of how it may affect you and your loved one.

3. Join a support group like Al-Anon, Nar-Anon, or Adult Children of Alcoholics.

4. Talk to the rehab about family or couples therapy. Bear in mind that this may not be appropriate until after your loved one settles into rehab. But once they’re ready, family therapy can help you have difficult conversations about their addiction. If your goal is to heal your relationship, this may be the best way to get started.

Your Role in Your Loved One’s Recovery

When someone decides to go to rehab, it affects their loved ones, too.. And you can play an important part in their recovery journey. But, you can only do that when you’re taking care of yourself. It can feel like you’re responsible for their well-being before, during, and after their treatment. But in fact, setting reasonable expectations will make your relationship more sustainable. And—just as importantly—it will support your healing process.

To learn more about your loved one’s options for treatment, visit our searchable list of rehabs to see information about pricing, locations, specializations, and more.

Staging an Intervention: Everything You Need to Know to Prepare

When you think of an intervention, you might picture a classic scene from a movie or TV show. A group of family and friends gather together in a living room, talking to a loved one about their addiction. While this is one way to do it, there are many more ways to stage an intervention. And some of them can be even more effective than what you see in the movies.

Staging an intervention requires a great deal of planning. The more you prepare, the more likely you are to achieve your goals—whatever they may be. You can even get help from a trained interventionist, who can help you plan ahead.

If you want your loved one to get inpatient treatment for an addiction, you don’t have to reinvent the wheel. There are plenty of tools available to help you get through this process. You can use the resources below to define your goals, connect with experts, and find the best way forward.

What Is an Intervention?

Interventions can be helpful when a person doesn’t see how much harm their behavior is doing. This is a regular occurrence, because denial is such a common part of addiction. ((Ponizovskiy, P., & Gofman, A. (2017). Cognitive status and addiction denial in the early stages of alcohol addiction. European Psychiatry, 41(S1), s874–s874. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.eurpsy.2017.01.1759))

The Recovery Research Institute defines “intervention” ((Addictionary®. (2017, January 26). Recovery Research Institute. https://www.recoveryanswers.org/addiction-ary/)) as a meeting between an addicted person and their loved ones, to address the issue of drug or alcohol abuse. These conversations include the “expression of care, concern, and explicit demands.” And usually, loved ones urge the person to get formal treatment for addiction.

You can also stage an intervention for someone with unmanaged mental health issues, whether or not they show signs of addiction. In that case, the goal might be for your loved one to get residential mental health treatment.

Despite what you see in the media, people don’t have to “hit rock bottom” before they can recover. ((Kirouac, M., & Witkiewitz, K. (2017). Identifying “hitting bottom” among individuals with alcohol problems: Development and evaluation of the noteworthy aspects of drinking important to recovery(Nadir). Substance Use & Misuse, 52(12), 1602–1615. https://doi.org/10.1080/10826084.2017.1293104)) This might change the way you plan an intervention. You don’t need to wait for their addiction to get worse. It’s okay — and could even be preferable — to have this crucial conversation as soon as you notice a problem.

The ultimate goal of an intervention is for your loved one to change their behavior. But you can’t make that change for them. All you can do is support them through the process of getting professional help. Then, the hard work of recovery is up to them.

How to Recognize Your Loved One Needs Help

If someone you care about is showing signs of addiction, it might be time to plan an intervention. But your exact plans will depend on the severity of their drug abuse, and their level of awareness. For example, people with alcohol addictions don’t always realize they’re drinking too much. But by the time a person has an addiction to methamphetamines, they probably know it’s a problem. These are some of the conditions that might prompt you to stage an intervention:

If you think someone you love needs an intervention, you can begin planning next steps. In most situations, it’s best to start by talking to mutual friends or family members. Their insight can help in 2 important ways. First, it will give you a clearer sense of what your loved one is going through. This might help you make the intervention itself even more effective. And second, by connecting these people, you’ll also get valuable support. These relationships can be a source of strength for all involved—even the person who needs rehab.

Why Interventions Can Work

Data shows that social support is an important part of addiction recovery. ((Rapier, R., McKernan, S., & Stauffer, C. S. (2019). An inverse relationship between perceived social support and substance use frequency in socially stigmatized populations. Addictive Behaviors Reports, 10, 100188. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.abrep.2019.100188)) Connecting with loved ones is powerful. Even in a fun, easy context, seeing all the people you trust in a single room can be inspiring. When all those people come together for a purpose, they can make a huge difference.

There’s little objective data about the long-term success of interventions. ((Association of intervention specialists—Ais—Certified interventionist. (n.d.). AIS. Retrieved from https://www.associationofinterventionspecialists.org/)) This is partly because you can define “success” in a few ways. It could be that the person stops using drugs, goes to rehab, or just admits they have a problem. But no matter what outcome you’re hoping for, it’s important to approach the issue with care.

Who Should Lead an Intervention?

Most interventions tend to have a few things in common. These are loving conversations between friends and family. They take place in non-threatening environments, like a home or a therapist’s office. The exact details will vary, depending which of the following approaches you use. There are 2 main ways to stage an intervention:

  • doing it on your own
  • working with a professional interventionist

DIY Interventions

When you do an intervention yourself, your group will be responsible for every part of the process. You’ll schedule it with the other participants, and carefully plan what to say. You’ll also need to collect resources to share during the conversation. These might include contact information for rehabs, local therapists, and similar. If you feel confident in your group’s ability to take these steps, you can use this checklist to get started.

Someone from your group will have to lead the conversation. You should decide who this will be far in advance, so they have ample time to prepare. Make sure this person is ready to stay strong throughout the conversation. If you’re concerned they might be overwhelmed by their own emotions, it’s better to choose someone else. The leader should be ready to calmly respond to any conflicts that arise.

It’s also essential to have a plan for what comes next, especially if the person agrees to get treatment. Someone from your group should commit to helping with this process. Depending on how the intervention goes, that could mean a number of different things. You might end up helping the person research rehabs, or taking them to a doctor to discuss medical detox.

Even if you don’t hire an interventionist, you can ask someone else for expert support. For example, you might ask a trusted authority figure to participate. This could be the person’s doctor, therapist, or spiritual leader. While their presence isn’t necessary, it may help emphasize the gravity of the situation.

Professional Intervention Services

If a DIY intervention isn’t right for you, you can hire a professional interventionist. These mental health specialists are trained to facilitate difficult conversations. They’ll also help you and your loved one plan for what comes next. For example, this might mean choosing between addiction treatment programs.

If your group of friends and family can’t take on the burden of planning, you might want to work with a professional. This strategy can help people with busy schedules, who just don’t have the time to take the lead. It’s also a good fit for groups who have strained relationships with each other. In that case, the expert can act as a “referee,” helping you process your feelings before the group meeting. This protects the person with an addiction from your interpersonal conflicts. They’ll have to face those issues during treatment, but an intervention is the wrong time to air old grievances.

A professional will also know how to de-escalate potentially dangerous situations. They’ll also be more objective than a friend or family member ever could be. For you, this is a life-changing event, and your loved one’s future depends on its outcome. For an interventionist, it’s an opportunity to help a person they just met. That clarity can help them guide you and your loved ones toward the best possible solution.

Working with an expert can be very effective—but it can also be very expensive. Before you hire an interventionist, make sure you understand the cost.

Cost Can be a Barrier

Drug abuse interventions are not covered by insurance. A rehab program might be able to support the process, or send a professional to help. But it can be hard to arrange this before the person commits to treatment. You should expect to pay for intervention services out of pocket.

The cost can vary widely based on your location and specific needs. Some interventionists use a sliding scale, but even that can be a significant fee. In some cases, the cost can be as much as $10,000 or more.

As you put your budget together, you should also consider the cost of inpatient treatment. Unlike an intervention, rehab is often covered by insurance. Some centers even accept Medicare and Medicaid.

If a professional intervention is too expensive, you can certainly try doing it on your own. And remember that it’s okay to change your mind. If you choose to try a DIY intervention, family tensions might still come up while you prepare. At that point, you can always pivot and seek professional help.

To find an interventionist in the U.S., you can call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) national 24/7 helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). The Association of Intervention Specialists (AIS) also provides a network of professional interventionists across North America and Britain.

Types of Interventions

There are several ways to format these meetings. If you work with a professional, they may have a preferred style. In a DIY intervention, you can choose the structure that works best for you. This can be based on the number of people in the room, or a more philosophical approach.

Choosing Who Should Be Present

The number of people in the room might have a noticeable effect on the person you’re addressing. It’s best to put some pressure on them, without making them feel so overwhelmed that they shut down. Some people may even respond best to private conversations.

  • 1:1 Conversation: In this format, a close friend or family member approaches the person by themselves. It’s important to start the conversation in a safe, neutral setting. Although it may seem more casual, it’s important to prepare what you’ll say in advance. You should also plan to follow up with them, to make sure they’re following through on any agreements you both made.
  • Group Conversation: This is the classic intervention style you may be familiar with from the media. A group of people gather to talk to one person about their concerning behavior. The group should meet beforehand to plan together and set clear goals.
  • Crisis Response: These conversations are normally unplanned. Instead, they happen after an emergency. When you can’t ignore the problem any more, you might have to confront your loved one without preparation. By the time you reach this point, paramedics or police officers may be present. This can make the situation feel more intense, but it may also give you direct access to more resources.

Choosing a Treatment Approach

You can also think about what type of format you’d like your conversation to follow. These styles work best during planned group conversations. They may be less appropriate for 1:1 interventions, or crisis interventions.

  • The Johnson Intervention model ((Johnson intervention. (n.d.). Https://Www.Apa.Org. Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/pi/about/publications/caregivers/practice-settings/intervention/johnson-intervention)) is non-confrontational. Instead, family and friends communicate facts as simply as possible. You’ll take turns describing the effect your loved one’s addiction has on your own lives. An interventionist will help you plan the session, but it may be a surprise to the person you’re speaking to. With their help, you’ll present possible treatment options for the person to choose from.
  • ARISE Interventions ((Comprehensive interventional care: Recovery network. (n.d.). ARISE® Network. Retrieved from https://www.arise-network.com/arise-intervention/)) are invitational. In other words, your group will invite the person of concern to take part in every step of the process. This method is a gentler, more gradual alternative to the Johnson model. These interventions are led by professionals trained in the ARISE method.

With or without expert guidance, it can be hard to pick which format is best for you, your group, and your loved one. As you begin that process, you may find it helpful to set some clear goals. Once you have a destination in mind, you can decide which route you’ll take to get there.

Setting Clear Goals

It’s important for everyone in your group to agree on a specific goal. This will become the focal point of the intervention. And you may already know exactly what you’re working toward. If not, consider the following list of potential outcomes:

  • The person acknowledges that their actions have caused harm.
  • They admit that they have a problem with drugs or alcohol.
  • They agree to talk to a professional, and get more information about treatment.
  • The group schedules another meeting to discuss the situation further.
  • The person checks into a rehab facility.

In most interventions, you’ll communicate your goals during the first meeting. If all goes well, your loved one will start working toward them right away. Because of this, it’s best to show up with resources in hand, so they can get started quickly.

Resources for Addiction Treatment

If the person you’re talking to is receptive, you can end the intervention by suggesting a path forward. These resources can help them move forward:

  • information about how to get treatment using their insurance
  • contact information for rehab programs that might meet their needs
  • a doctor’s appointment with their primary care physician for the next day
  • contact information for a medical detox center
  • information about the medical leave policy at their job
  • the meeting schedule for a local or online support group
  • a person in the room who’s willing to help them research treatment options
  • someone who can drive or accompany them to rehab
  • a person to host or stay with them that night and provide emotional support
  • a small group of people willing to clean their home before they return, getting rid of any drugs and drug paraphernalia

Depending on your situation, some of these resources may be more helpful than others. Whatever you decide to share, make sure you have a list prepared in advance. That way, you won’t have to take time out of the meeting to do research on the fly. You should also be ready to talk about the consequences if they don’t accept your help.

Defining Consequences

Ideally, your loved one will do as you ask. But at first, they might resist what you’re saying. It’s important to explain that there will be consequences if they refuse to get help. There are 2 reasons for this. First, doing this might convince your loved one to take action. And second, if they keep using drugs, it protects you from their behavior.

Any consequences you set should have these qualities:

  • Enforceability. You should be able to follow through on your commitments. For example, it’s not realistic to say you’ll never speak to a roommate again. Even if you move out, there will be logistics to discuss.
  • Proportionality. Any repercussions should fit the situation at hand. You’d respond one way to someone who shows up late to work, and another way to someone who threatens their family.
  • Sense of safety. This process isn’t only for the person with an addiction. It should also help you keep yourself safe. Setting and enforcing healthy boundaries can empower you to meet your own needs.

After you define these goals and consequences, you can make more specific preparations. Use your big ideas to inform the details. You can use the checklist below to take the next steps.

Your Intervention Preparation Checklist

When you start planning, emotions may be running high. It’s best to write everything down, and refer to your notes if you get overwhelmed. Use this checklist to stay on track.

  • Decide on a type of intervention. Will you hire an interventionist, or stage it yourself? If you’re working with a professional, get them involved as early as possible.
  • Plan who will be present. If you want a group of people to be there, keep the number small. Everyone attending should help with the planning process.
  • Choose a format. You can choose the Johnson method, the ARISE model, or something else that works better for you.
  • Pick your location. You might meet in someone’s home, a therapist’s office, or another neutral location. It should feel as safe as possible for everyone attending.
  • Rehearse what you’ll say. Plan what you’ll say in advance. This can help you avoid getting sidetracked or flustered. You might also look up words to avoid, like “alcoholic” and “junkie.”
  • Manage expectations. Your loved one might respond well, or they might get angry. They might even walk out. If that happens, it’s up to you to follow through anyway. Hold your boundaries and keep yourself safe.
  • Conduct the intervention. Many people find excuses to avoid difficult conversations. Don’t lose sight of your goal. Once you start planning, it’s important to go forward.
  • Follow up. Enforce any consequences you set, no matter how the person responds. And unless you decide to cut off contact, someone should check in with them soon after your meeting.

1 intervention alone might not be enough to motivate change. And even if someone agrees to get help, they may not know where to start. To effectively support your loved one, your group might need to keep working together for some time.

Planning for Long-Term Recovery

Staging an intervention requires courage and preparation. Make sure to care for yourself throughout the process. You might want to see a therapist or join a support group. This meeting is just the first step in a much longer recovery journey. As you prepare for that process, remember that your mental health matters, too.

To plan for the next phase of recovery, learn more about inpatient rehab centers that treat drug and alcohol addiction. Get the information you need about pricing, family therapy, relapse prevention, and more.

How to Set Boundaries With an Addicted Loved One

It is, in fact, possible to love someone too much. When you care about a person with an addiction, it can be hard to stop yourself from giving. But over time, generosity can become counterproductive. In the very attempt to support them, you may be enabling their unhealthiest behaviors. If what they really need is treatment for a substance use disorder, you both might benefit from a little tough love.

Because addiction begets codependency, it’s crucial for you to set and maintain healthy boundaries. This process might be daunting at first. You may be concerned about being too harsh, especially if your loved one is facing other challenges. But setting boundaries is often the first step toward healing—for yourself, your relationship, and the person you love.

Adding ‘No’ to Your Love Language

Good boundaries are an important part of any dynamic, and they are even more critical when your loved one has a substance use disorder. Although it can be painful to establish ground rules, this process is a vital part of building sustainable relationships, and caring for your own mental health.

Think of healthy boundaries as rules or guidelines for how you want to be treated by the people around you. As therapist and somatics teacher Prentis Hemphill says, “Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.” ((Boundaries: Definition, examples & how to set them. (n.d.). The Berkeley Well-Being Institute. Retrieved from https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/boundaries.html))

It’s up to you to define what behavior you will and will not accept, communicate that to your loved ones, and decide what the consequences will be if you’re mistreated. By protecting yourself, you can also provide better, more sustainable support to a loved one with a substance use disorder. And the act of loving yourself can encourage those around you to set their own boundaries. It may even inspire them to begin recovery.

Defining Your Needs

When you’re ready to start this process, begin by looking inward. It might be helpful to talk to a therapist or trusted friend, or spend time journaling about your feelings. Think about your most deeply held beliefs, your goals for yourself, and your needs in this relationship. Make sure your stated boundaries reflect your core values, without sacrificing your well-being for someone else’s sake.

With the big picture in mind, consider what you need from the other person in order to feel safe. This may seem selfish, especially if you’ve been deprioritizing your own needs for a long time. Try to accept that discomfort as part of the process.

Boundaries can be as simple or as complex as you need them to be. The following examples may help you start thinking about what’s right for you.

  • I won’t pay your bills or give you money.
  • I won’t answer the phone if you call after a certain time of night.
  • I won’t communicate with you while I’m at work or busy with other things.
  • I won’t drink or take other substances when we’re together.
  • I won’t spend time with you while you’re drunk or high.
  • I won’t engage in conversations that idealize substance misuse.
  • I won’t communicate with you again until you’re in treatment.

These are just examples, and they may not suit your specific situation. Once you’ve determined which boundaries you need to set, you can start thinking about how you’ll respond if they’re crossed.

Establishing Consequences

Boundaries are only meaningful when you’re prepared to maintain them. This can prove difficult over time, especially when challenging situations arise. Do your best to plan in advance how you’ll respond if your loved one crosses a clearly communicated line.

Consequences aren’t necessarily punishments; instead, they’re a way to support yourself through difficult relationship dynamics. For example, you might institute some of the following consequences if a loved one disrespects your boundaries:

  • If you show up at my home unannounced, I won’t let you in.
  • If you call or text me while I’m at work, I’ll block your number for 24 hours.
  • If your behavior puts me in physical danger, I will leave immediately, no matter what we’re doing.
  • If you arrive later than planned because you’ve been drinking or doing drugs, I won’t spend time with you that day.
  • If you miss therapy or a support group meeting, I won’t speak to you until after you attend your next session.

Make sure these consequences are clear, firm, and realistic. For example, if a long-distance friend lies to you, you can stop speaking to them. That same consequence wouldn’t work for a roommate or live-in partner. Even if you decide to move out and end the relationship, you’ll have to communicate about logistics. If you can’t follow through on these predefined consequences, your loved one may feel empowered to ignore your needs entirely.

Defining your boundaries is an act of self-care. And once you’ve done that work, it’s time to talk to your loved one. This conversation might be difficult, but it’s the first step toward building a healthier dynamic.

Talking it Through

Clear communication is a necessary part of changing a relationship dynamic. And when your loved one has a substance use disorder, you may not be able to rely on them to start these important conversations.

It’s best to schedule this discussion in advance, so that you’ll both have time to emotionally prepare. If at all possible, approach your loved one when they’re calm and sober. If that’s not possible, don’t delay the conversation indefinitely. You have the right to ask for what you need, whether or not they can give it to you.

This is your opportunity to articulate your boundaries as clearly and effectively as possible. You might even take notes in advance, to help organize your thoughts. You can also discuss why you’re putting these guidelines in place, but you don’t have to. Your needs don’t require justification.

Make sure this conversation focuses on the real reason for this new framework: your love for the other person, and your concern for your mutual well-being. If you didn’t want them in your life at all, you could simply walk away instead of doing this work together. Let them know that you care about them, and that this is how you can keep supporting them without burning out or ending your relationship entirely.

Maintaining Healthy Boundaries

After you’ve explained what your boundaries are, it’s up to you to hold the line. Your loved one may be unwilling or unable to respect your limits, especially if their addiction is severe enough to have lasting cognitive effects. Preliminary research suggests that substance misuse may even interfere with empathy, ((Massey, S. H., Newmark, R. L., & Wakschlag, L. S. (2018). Explicating the role of empathic processes in substance use disorders: A conceptual framework and research agenda. Drug and Alcohol Review, 37(3), 316–332. https://doi.org/10.1111/dar.12548)) making it difficult for people to understand others’ needs.

Be prepared for your loved one to ignore or actively disrespect your stated boundaries. This may happen during the initial conversation, if they try to argue or undermine your reasoning. But even if they seem supportive at first, you may come into conflict in the future.

You can prepare for this eventuality by deciding in advance how you’ll react if your boundaries are challenged. While it’s natural to respond with anger, it’s also ineffective. This opens the door for further argument, and may destabilize both your mental health and your relationship.

The other extreme, passivity, is equally unproductive. By quietly allowing the person to disrespect you, you send the message that your needs are not important. This can encourage them to continue treating you poorly, because their bad behavior has no negative consequences.

By planning ahead, you can guard against either of these outcomes. Set the precedent that you deserve love and support. And whether or not you receive care from them, you can give it to yourself. This framework will not only improve your mental health; it can also improve your relationship. It might even show your loved one a much-needed example of self-care, and motivate them to think about recovery.

The Benefits of Healthy Boundaries

It’s ok to be conflicted about setting boundaries. Many people struggle to balance their own needs with the desire to protect loved ones from negative consequences. Remember that this process, while complex, will ultimately benefit you both. In fact, healthy boundaries can improve many aspects of mental health and relationships.

Cultivating Compassion

You can’t pour from an empty cup. When caring for someone depletes your emotional energy, you become vulnerable to compassion fatigue. ((Are you experiencing compassion fatigue? (n.d.). Https://Www.Apa.Org. Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/topics/covid-19/compassion-fatigue)) This condition is similar to burnout, and can make it difficult for you to continue supporting the people you love. While the term is normally used to describe burnout in healthcare professionals, anyone can reach a similar limit. And even if you still want to put your loved one’s needs before your own, you might reach a point where you just can’t care for them any more.

By giving yourself room to breathe and recharge through clear-cut boundaries, you can maintain reserves of energy, patience, and mental bandwidth. This practice empowers you to support your loved one in a more sustainable way.

Working Through Codependency

The concept of codependency ((Stafford, L. L. (2001). Is codependency a meaningful concept? Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 22(3), 273–286. https://doi.org/10.1080/01612840121607)) was originally developed to describe maladaptive behaviors of people married to patients with alcohol use disorder (AUD). In recent years, the subject has become controversial. Some researchers believe that this condition is too vague to be clinically meaningful. Nevertheless, many people continue to find help and support by exploring their own codependent tendencies.

According to the American Psychological Association, codependency is “a dysfunctional relationship pattern ((Apa dictionary of psychology. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://dictionary.apa.org/)) in which an individual is psychologically dependent on (or controlled by) a person who has a pathological addiction.” This pattern may present itself in some counterintuitive ways. For example, a codependent person may attempt to control the behavior of their loved ones, without realizing their own actions are causing harm.

Despite common misconceptions, it’s important to note that relationships are not codependent; people are. By uncoupling your identity from your loved one’s identity—and their substance misuse—you can begin to define the boundaries that will protect your energy and mental health.

Turning to Tough Love

If you love someone with a substance use disorder, you may be concerned about their overindulgence. It’s also possible to overindulge in love. And sometimes, the best way to care for someone is by stepping back, and letting them make their own decisions. As much as you might want to help, you can’t go through recovery for them.

Establishing boundaries doesn’t have to mean cutting ties or refusing to help—although it can, if that’s what you need. However, you may be able to rebalance your relationship, providing support from a healthy distance that respects your needs as well as theirs.

To learn more about the recovery process, you can connect with a rehab center to find a good match for your loved one’s recovery journey.

Reviewed by Rajnandini Rathod

What to Do When Someone You Love Is Suicidal

Immediate help is available. If you or someone in your life is experiencing suicidal thoughts, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Suicidal ideation, or suicidality, is the act of wanting or expressing that you want to commit suicide. If someone you love shows these symptoms, they should be taken very seriously. Fortunately, there are ways that you can help. Some rehab programs offer treatment for suicidal ideation.

Suicide is a global health concern. ((World Suicide Prevention Day 2021: Global Suicide Statistics. (2021). International Association for Suicide Prevention. https://www.iasp.info/wp-content/uploads/WSPD-Facts-Figures-Infographic.pdf)) In 2019, it caused more than 1 in every 100 deaths worldwide. And 47,511 people died of suicide in the U.S. ((Suicide statistics. (2019, November 15). American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/)) in the same year, making it the nation’s 10th leading cause of death. Suicidal tendencies may be caused by chronic mental health conditions, adverse life experiences, or a history of trauma. Whatever a person’s circumstances, it’s important to believe them if they express an interest in suicide.

If you’re concerned that a loved one is at risk, there are many ways you can take action. In this event, it’s important to be aware of your own capabilities. No matter how much you care about someone, you may not be able to keep them safe without professional help. But you can absolutely connect them with the resources they need. In order to get them the best possible care, you should first learn to recognize the signs and symptoms of suicidality.

How to Recognize Suicidal Ideation

Suicidal ideation may be a symptom of a number of mental health concerns, including but not limited to depression, schizophrenia, and bipolar disorder. It can also appear in the absence of any other diagnosis. People who have recently experienced a great loss—such as the death of a loved one, the end of a partnership or a job, or another major life change—may be at risk.

Not every mention of suicide is a sign of imminent danger. ((The myths & facts of youth suicide. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://suicideprevention.nv.gov/Youth/Myths/)) If your loved one has major depression, talking about their fears may be a call for help, or a sign that they trust you enough to share their innermost feelings. Pay close attention to the context of the conversation, and the specific details they share, in order to assess how urgent the situation is. A person at immediate risk of suicide definitely requires emergency care. On the other hand, a person who is casually thinking about suicide with no plans to act on those thoughts may benefit more from therapy and increased social support.

However you respond, it’s important to take any suicidal thoughts very seriously. Begin by reaching out to experts who can help. You can always start by calling or texting a suicide hotline, such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, the Crisis Textline, or the Trans Lifeline, which specifically supports transgender clients. In addition, there are some specific warning signs you can look for when you’re concerned that a loved one may be considering suicide.

Verbal Warning Signs

People with suicidal ideation may or may not tell you exactly what’s on their mind. Of course, frequent discussions of the topic are in and of themselves warning signs of suicide. ((Risk factors, protective factors, and warning signs. (2019, December 25). American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. https://afsp.org/risk-factors-protective-factors-and-warning-signs/)) However, the signs aren’t always that straightforward. They may also talk about feeling hopeless, trapped, or “like a burden.” Any of these subjects may indicate suicidality, especially if they come up on a regular basis.

If a person trusts you enough to tell you how they’re feeling, it’s important to respond with kindness and compassion. Consciously or not, this may be their way of asking for help. Understand that you can’t “fix” the problem for them, but you can guide them toward professional help.

Changed Behavior

You can help prevent suicide ((Could You Help Prevent a Suicide? Know the Warning Signs. (2021, September 12). U.S. News. https://www.usnews.com/news/health-news/articles/2021-09-12/could-you-help-prevent-a-suicide-know-the-warning-signs)) by simply noticing if and how a loved one’s habits change. Suicidal ideation can cause people to lose interest in activities they used to enjoy. If you notice that a person you care about has stopped engaging in their favorite hobbies, talking to their closest friends, or taking pride in their work, it may be a sign of poor mental health.

However, this alone is not necessarily a cause for concern. People grow, and their interests may change over time. Specifically, a person who pulls back from beloved activities in order to spend more time idle and alone may be at risk.

Isolation

If a person starts to withdraw from social plans they once enjoyed, or puts significant distance between themselves and their closest loved ones, they may be exhibiting warning signs. Many of those with suicidal ideation worry that their poor mental health is hurting those around them, and withdraw from relationships in order to lessen that perceived burden. However, this increased isolation may just exacerbate their symptoms.

Sudden Improvement

It may seem counterintuitive, but a seemingly rapid recovery can also be a warning sign. Many people experience a sense of peace or relief when they fully commit to the idea of suicide. To an outside observer, this may look like improvement. In reality, healing from suicidal ideation is a complex process, and may take a long time. If a person is talking about suicide one day, and seems to be perfectly healthy the next, it may be a serious cause for concern.

In particular, sudden generosity may be a sign that the person is planning to commit suicide ((Suicide risk | syracuse university school of education. (2018, October 21). https://soe.syr.edu/departments/academic/counseling-human-services/modules/suicide/)) in the near future. It’s common for people to start giving away their most prized possessions in preparation for the act itself, in the attempt to avoid being a burden on loved ones after they’re gone.

Making Plans for Suicide

When a person starts talking about specific plans for suicide, ((Warning signs of suicide. (n.d.). National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). Retrieved from https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/warning-signs-of-suicide)) or starts collecting items that may be used for self harm, you should take emergency action. This may include going out to buy a gun, hoarding prescription medications, or performing internet searches on the subject of self-harm.

Some people plan to commit suicide on a particular date, after a certain milestone is reached, or under other specific circumstances. If someone you believe to be suicidal starts talking about a day after which “they’ll be gone,” you should do your best to get them professional help as soon as possible.

Supporting a Loved One through Suicidal Crisis

If someone you love is showing any of these warning signs, they may require urgent medical care. Depending on your area, there may be a variety of options available.

Stay Present

If you believe someone is in imminent danger, do not leave them alone. Psychologist Ursula Whiteside explains that even the most intense emotions “usually resolve or become manageable in less than 24 or 48 hours.” Just staying present, either in person or by phone, can significantly lower your loved one’s risk of suicide. ((Chatterjee, R. (2020, December 15). Reach out: How to help someone at risk of suicide. NPR. https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2019/04/20/707686101/how-to-help-someone-at-risk-of-suicide))

Don’t be afraid to discuss the issue head-on. Some people are afraid to mention suicide, for fear it can trigger a loved one’s symptoms. However, Doreen Marshall, psychologist and vice president of programs at the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, says “there’s no research to support that.” Instead, she recommends asking direct questions, like “have you ever had thoughts of suicide?” or “what do you think of people who kill themselves?” These questions can open up a conversation, inviting your loved one to ask for the specific kind of support they need.

If at all possible, try to discourage a person in crisis from using substances. There is a strong link between substance misuse and suicidality, ((Division (DCD), D. C. (2013, February 9). Does alcohol and other drug abuse increase the risk for suicide? [Text]. HHS.Gov. https://www.hhs.gov/answers/mental-health-and-substance-abuse/does-alcohol-increase-risk-of-suicide/index.html)) and substances may be especially tempting for a person who is used to self-medicating. However, this behavior can destabilize brain chemistry even further, making it hard for a person to safely navigate a crisis.

Find Professional Help

Although you may be able to sit with someone for a few hours or even a few days, you can’t provide your own loved one with professional mental health care. No matter how well you know them, or how well-trained you are in the field of psychology, the simple fact of your relationship means you cannot be objective. And a person in crisis deserves to receive high quality care.

If the person is not in immediate physical danger, you can take the time to research inpatient programs that treat suicidal clients. You might start by looking for behavioral health providers that are in-network with their insurance. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) also recommends contacting your loved one’s “primary care physician to arrange a mental health screening and evaluation.” In less urgent circumstances, a loved one who is suicidal ((Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, Helping Your Loved One Who is Suicidal: A Guide for Family and Friends, Publication No. PEP20-01-03-001. Rockville, MD: Center for Mental Health Services, Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, 2021. https://store.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/SAMHSA_Digital_Download/PEP20-01-03-001.pdf)) may find this process less jarring than being taken to the emergency room.

Get Emergency Care

If your loved one is in immediate physical danger, you should call emergency services. ((Calling 911 and talking with police | nami: National alliance on mental illness. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.nami.org/Your-Journey/Family-Members-and-Caregivers/Calling-911-and-Talking-with-Police)) In the U.S., you can dial 911 and explain to the operator what’s happening. They may respond by sending an ambulance or a police officer. In this situation, the police can take a person to the hospital either voluntarily or involuntarily.

You may be in the same room as your loved one, and so able to meet a team of emergency service providers in person. However, if you’re concerned because you can’t reach a loved one, you can also call and ask for a wellness check. In this case, you should “call the non-emergency number for the police department in your community and explain why you are concerned.” When you explain the situation, they may be able to visit your loved one and check on them even if you’re not physically present.

Rehab for Suicidal Ideation

In an emergency situation, it’s important to act quickly. But don’t assume that the situation will immediately be resolved. Short-term care is just the beginning of a much longer healing process. And for some clients, it’s best to attend rehab to treat suicidality.

Not every rehab facility is equipped to treat people with these symptoms. Clients with suicidal ideation may need specialized care. If your loved one is considering inpatient treatment, make sure to ask the admissions team which of the following amenities they offer:

24-Hour Supervision

During a suicidal crisis, clients often require round-the-clock care. This high level of supervision is a temporary emergency measure, and not a long-term solution. Certain rehab facilities offer constant monitoring to prevent clients from inflicting self-harm.

Anti-Ligature Protocols

In a facility with anti-ligature protocols, providers take special care to keep clients from accessing items that might cause them harm. Specifically, an anti-ligature fixture is designed in such a way that clients cannot attach any other objects to it. Facilities with these protocols might also ask residents to surrender their shoelaces, or prohibit them from using knives during meals.

Emergency Pharmaceutical Treatment

During and immediately after a crisis, some clients may benefit from pharmaceutical treatment. Specifically, doctors may administer ketamine ((Witt, K., Potts, J., Hubers, A., Grunebaum, M. F., Murrough, J. W., Loo, C., Cipriani, A., & Hawton, K. (2020). Ketamine for suicidal ideation in adults with psychiatric disorders: A systematic review and meta-analysis of treatment trials. The Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry, 54(1), 29–45. https://doi.org/10.1177/0004867419883341)) or benzodiazepines ((Chiles, J. A. (2019, October 11). The appropriate use of medications in suicidal patients [News]. Psychopharmacology. https://psychnews.psychiatryonline.org/doi/abs/10.1176/appi.pn.2019.pp10a2)) (such as xanax) to interrupt urgent suicidal ideation. These treatments are not appropriate for all clients, nor are they long-term solutions. They’re simply a way to temporarily relieve symptoms, giving you, your loved one, and their medical team the time to plan for longer-term care.

Life Beyond Suicidality

Suicidal ideation is extremely serious. However, it doesn’t have to result in an emergency. If you can recognize the warning signs, you may be able to get your loved one help before they attempt self-harm.

Whenever you take action, make sure to respond with an appropriate level of urgency. In some cases, it’s appropriate to admit the person to a hospital immediately. In other situations, it may be even more beneficial to simply help them find a therapist.

Remember that you, too, have limits. There’s only so much that any one person can do to help someone in a the midst of a suicidal crisis. And that’s why it’s so important to seek out professional help.

To learn more about your options, you can browse our list of rehabs that treat suicidal ideation.

How to Talk to a Loved One About Going to Rehab: A Conversation Guide

It can be hard to talk about substance use disorders. And that’s especially true if your loved one is in crisis, or in denial about their condition. But these conversations are crucial, and they can have a hugely positive impact. If you’re concerned about a friend or family member’s substance misuse, these strategies may help you show them that rehab can help.

Remember that everyone’s journey is different. The following tips are only suggestions, and they may not resonate with everyone. As you prepare to talk to your loved one, consider their needs, goals, and values. By taking their unique situation into account, you can make them feel even more supported.

1. Prepare Carefully

These conversations should not happen at random. It may not be appropriate to tell your loved one what you’d like to talk about in advance, because a person in denial may avoid the subject at all costs. However, you should show up for this conversation intentionally, instead of bringing it up in the middle of another activity. Even if you see a good segue, don’t take it. Remember the moment for a future date, and reference it when you start your well-planned conversation.

Choose a private, comfortable environment where your loved one is likely to feel safe. Decide who’s going to be there. Depending on the situation, it might be best to approach them one-on-one, or with a group of trusted family and friends, or even with a trained interventionist.

In a group, you’ll have support from more people, which makes it harder for your loved one to evade accountability. On the other hand, this dynamic might make them feel ganged up on or threatened. You know your loved one best; try to choose the format that you think will have the greatest impact on the specific person you’re talking to.

On the day of your meeting, make sure to care for yourself as well. Your emotional state will set the tone of the conversation. If you can approach them from a calm, centered place, you’ll be able to communicate much more effectively.

2. Stay Sober

These conversations aren’t effective if anyone in the room is using substances of any kind. That includes you, and it includes substances that your loved one isn’t misusing. For example, if they struggle with the overuse of cannabis, it may seem safe to talk to them over a beer. It’s not. This can impair your judgment, erode their trust in you, and invite them to disregard your opinion.

It’s important to set an example for your loved one, through both your words and your behavior. Spending sober time together can show them that there are ways to connect with people without engaging in substance use. This is an extremely important part of healing, and may give them hope that change is possible.

3. Be Compassionate

This conversation is going to be hard, and likely painful for both of you. There’s no way around that. Your loved one may lash out at you, argue, or simply ignore what you’re saying. It’s natural to feel anger and sadness in response.

However, it’s absolutely vital that you remain level-headed. Don’t express your frustration to them. By engaging in a fight, you send the message that this subject is negotiable, and that you might be in the wrong. Instead, state your case as simply and kindly as you can, and listen to their response as a way of collecting more information. Plan a time to process your own feelings with someone else after the conversation ends.

4. Validate Their Struggle

It’s important to understand that having a substance use disorder is not a choice. Your loved one’s impulses may be outside their control, and caused by a combination of brain chemistry and adverse life experiences. This is because substance misuse activates the brain’s reward system ((How addiction hijacks our reward system. (n.d.). Dana Foundation. Retrieved February 28, 2022, from https://www.dana.org/article/how-addiction-hijacks-our-reward-system/)) “by directly raising the levels of dopamine. Although each addictive drug also has its own unique effects, which is why alcohol feels different from cocaine or heroin, stimulation of the dopamine component of the reward system seems to be a common denominator.”

Even if a person does not enjoy the feeling of being high, they may be driven to use substances in order to increase their dopamine levels. It can be difficult to see a way out of this cycle. And no matter how hard it is for you to be around their unhealthy behavior, it’s likely harder for them to experience it.

Despite this, people who misuse substances are still responsible for their behavior. It’s possible to hold them accountable for their actions, without attacking them or thinking of them as “bad people.” The best way to encourage change is to approach them with kindness, understanding, and respect.

5. Be Honest and Specific

You can be kind without minimizing the impact of their behavior. Be compassionate, but firm. This is your opportunity to share your experience of their addiction, with as much detail as you can. Talk about how their behavior has affected you, and how you’ve seen it affect them.

However, “brutal” honesty can easily turn into an attack. Instead, make simple, objective statements that brook no argument. For example, saying “you ruined my birthday” is an accusation. On the other hand, saying “you showed up 3 hours late on my birthday, and we missed our dinner reservation,” conveys the same idea through purely factual information.

5. Be Firm

It’s likely that your loved one has a different narrative than yours. They certainly have more information about their own behavior than you do, but they may also have excuses that you find questionable. These different narratives can make it hard to agree on the facts of the issue.

Denial is the tendency of people with substance use disorders ((Addictionary—Glossary of substance use disorder terminology. (n.d.). Recovery Research Institute. Retrieved February 28, 2022, from https://www.recoveryanswers.org/addiction-ary/)) to ignore their symptoms “in spite of evidence to the contrary.” This is a very common symptom of substance use disorders. If your loved one is in denial, they may try to argue with your version of events. You may be tempted to give in to their arguments, out of compassion or just exhaustion.

However, it’s important that you not give in. Doing so can validate their denial, and enable their substance misuse. Instead, accept that this conversation will be stressful for you both. That’s ok. While it may be painful in the short term, this particular type of discomfort may help them grow and heal over time.

6. Share Resources

Before you start the conversation, it’s best to do some research into your loved one’s options. Starting rehab can be very daunting, and people with severe substance use disorders might not be able to handle the logistics without help.

You may need their help with certain specifics, but you can certainly get started on your own. As you prepare to talk to them, try to answer as many of these questions as you can in advance.

In order to get this information, it may be helpful to talk to the admissions team at a rehab center. These experts have a great deal of experience helping people begin treatment, and they may have valuable advice.

Arrive at the initial conversation with specific resources in hand. Remember, though, that this is your loved one’s process, and not yours. Unless you’re their parent or guardian, all you can do is make suggestions. It’s up to them to decide how to proceed.

7. Plan Together

At the end of the conversation, it’s time to make a plan. If your loved one is receptive to your ideas, you can help them decide which steps to take next. This may mean any number of things, from attending a local support group to connecting with an inpatient rehab program.

In some cases, however, they won’t be willing to accept your help. If that’s the case, be prepared to set boundaries and care for your own mental health. Only you can decide what boundaries are appropriate here. However, if there are no consequences to their refusal, you’ll send the message that your opinion is unimportant.

If you’re struggling to set boundaries with someone who has a substance use disorder, you may benefit from learning more about codependency. ((Codependency: An Educational Fact Sheet from the Florida Alcohol and Drug Abuse Association. (n.d.). Florida Alcohol and Drug Abuse Association. Retrieved January 5, 2022, from http://ocw.umb.edu/counseling-and-school-psychology/substance-abuse-and-the-family/New%20Folder/codependency.pdf/at_download/codependency.pdf)) This pattern of behavior often develops in response to dysfunctional relationship dynamics, and it may impact other areas of your life. After the crisis passes—either because the person gets help, or because you decide to step back—you may need to make time for your own healing process.

Following Through

After you talk to a loved one about their substance misuse, it’s important to follow through on your commitments. If they accept your help, that may mean helping them get into a rehab program, advocating on their behalf, or just spending time with them. Alternatively, it may mean setting strong boundaries with them, or even severing the relationship.

People in the throes of substance misuse often lack structure. If you really want to help, it’s absolutely vital that you do exactly what you say you’re going to do. Don’t agree to help with anything specific unless you have the capacity to carry it out to completion. And in the same vein, don’t articulate boundaries unless you’re prepared to uphold them. Doing otherwise might just serve to destabilize the person you’re trying to help, and may even lead to further self-destructive behavior.

And remember that while this conversation is extremely important, it’s just one step. No matter how well or poorly it goes, life will go on, and both you and your loved one will move forward. You can’t predict or control the future. But you can set the intention to heal, and encourage the people around you to do the same.

If you’re looking for a rehab program for a loved one, you can browse our directory of rehabs, which lists key information like pricing, location, insurance accepted, and more.

Reviewed by Rajnandini Rathod

Choosing a Rehab for Your Teen or Young Adult

If your teen or young adult is struggling with substance abuse, you likely have a lot on your mind. From wondering how your teen got involved in drugs in the first place to worrying about what the future holds, it’s tough to know where to turn and the right questions to ask. The encouraging news is that specialized therapy is accessible in a wide range of settings. Many rehabs offer programs designed exclusively for young people.

Teen substance abuse is a serious matter. Studies show that young people’s brains are still developing1 until they reach their mid-20s—especially the area responsible for decision-making. During this crucial time, substance use “can interfere with developmental processes occurring in the brain.” Long-term drug use alters young people’s cognitive function, putting them at risk for chronic dependency and bringing increasingly worse life consequences. That’s why it’s crucial to provide teens with the treatment they need now, so they can mature into healthy, well-adjusted adults.

If you’re looking for addiction treatment information for your teen or young adult, it helps to understand what they’re going through and what their options are.

Why Do Teens Use Substances?

Teenagers are in a unique stage of their lives. They’re forming their identities, going through bodily changes, and developing a stronger desire for independence. Their thinking is starting to expand beyond their limited, childhood view of the world. These changes can prompt them to challenge authority and experiment with different concepts that were previously off limits.

Unfortunately, at this age, the area of the brain responsible for decision-making hasn’t yet matured. Research suggests that “the developing brain may help explain why adolescents sometimes make decisions that are risky2 and can lead to safety or health concerns, including unique vulnerabilities to drug abuse.”

Aside from age alone, a number of factors can influence young people’s risk for substance abuse:

Co-Occurring Disorders and Self-Medication

Teenage years can take a toll on young people’s emotions, often leading to stress, depression, or lack of confidence. When teens feel sadness or anxiety and can’t find a positive outlet for their feelings, they might take comfort in drugs or alcohol.

Teens and young adults with mental health issues including depression, trauma, or ADHD may be more prone to abuse drugs. “The combination of these two conditions has its own term: dual diagnosis, or co-occurring disorders,” says the National Alliance on Mental Illness. “It is possible for either problem (substance abuse or mental illness) to emerge first.” The co-occurring disorders of addiction and mental illness3 can exacerbate each other’s negative effects, sometimes leading teens to aggressive or high-risk behavior. When this happens, it’s doubtful that teens and their families will break this destructive cycle without professional help. In some circumstances, the supervision and immersion that residential rehab offers can be the best approach to start young people on the road to recovery.

Co-occurring disorders are particularly complex and require specialized treatment. For more information, see the following:

Poor Self-Esteem

Research shows that “adolescents without strong social supports would have tendency towards smoking and drug abuse,”4 and that a lack of said support can decrease self-esteem.

Low self-esteem in teens can lead to self-destructive behaviors. Teenagers are pressured to look and act a certain way5 by the media, bullies, and often by their families. If they don’t meet those expectations, their confidence can take a hit. Using drugs or alcohol may make them feel like they fit in, or quiet their feelings of inadequacy.

Teenagers—frequently girls—often become self-conscious about their bodies and may feel like they need to have a certain body type to fit in with their peers or to attract romantic interests. One study on young people’s use of prescription stimulants for weight loss6 sadly found that “nearly 12% of respondents reported using prescription stimulants to lose weight.” As a result, teens caught in this cycle may also develop disordered eating.

Family History of Substance Abuse

If a teenager is close to an adult who suffers from addiction, they may be more likely to develop a substance abuse disorder themselves. They may turn to drugs or alcohol to cope with the stress of chaos in the household. Or perhaps they’re simply following examples set by older relatives. Some adolescents may even carry a stronger genetic predisposition to developing substance abuse disorders.7

What Are the Signs of Teen Substance Use?

If your teen is abusing drugs or alcohol, you’ve likely noticed some warning signs:

  • Dilated pupils or bloodshot eyes
  • Loss of coordination or slurred speech
  • Increased conflicts, aggression, or mood swings
  • Dishonesty
  • Withdrawing from family or friends
  • Changes in sleep habits or appetite
  • Lost interest in hobbies or other activities
  • A shift in their social circle
  • The smell of alcohol or marijuana
  • Finding alcohol or medication missing from the home
  • Drug paraphernalia such as a pipe, empty pill containers

It can be difficult to tell if this is merely a phase or if your teen is on the way to addiction. If you notice any of these indicators of substance abuse in your teen, it may be wise to begin researching treatment options or talking to a professional who can help.

Do You Need Your Minor’s Consent to Enroll Them in Treatment?

Whether or not parents or guardians can forcibly admit their child to rehab varies by state.8 In most U.S. states, minors under the age of 18 can be taken to rehab without their consent. State laws also vary depending on the following factors:

Level of care provided: Is the program you’re considering inpatient, outpatient, or a partial hospitalization program (PHP)?

Type of facility: Is the center you’re considering a mental health treatment center, drug rehabilitation center, or dual diagnosis treatment center?

Researching the protocols in your state, and talking to a rehab admissions team member, can help you determine the best course of action for your family.

For more information, see our frequently asked questions regarding involuntary rehab.

Specialized Treatments for Teens

Some program features are more commonly found at rehabs for teens and young adults. These aim to address problems that people at this age often face, and relate to them in a way that makes sense for their lived experience at this stage.

Gender-Specific Programs

Rehab programs in this age group are often gender-segregated. While this isn’t always necessary, it can offer a few advantages:

Reducing distraction: Recovery is a vulnerable process, and rehab clients can be more susceptible to developing attractions that can disrupt their treatment experience. This may be especially true for teens, for whom social interactions are of primary importance. Same-gender housing and shared spaces allows clients to focus fully on themselves for the duration of their time in rehab.

Working through gender-specific issues: These programs provide space for young people to address gender-based traumas or other concerns that more commonly affect people of their gender.

Strengthening bonds: Clients might have an easier time making friends with recovery peers who share this aspect of their experience.
Some teens may benefit more from treatment in a setting where they may learn from people of different backgrounds and life experiences. Coed programs may also offer more opportunities to practice their skills in settings that more closely resemble their larger community. What’s important is choosing a program that makes your teen feel emotionally safe, while introducing them to experiences that foster growth.

Eating Disorder Treatment

Adolescents can be especially vulnerable to eating disorders. According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, as many as 1 in 10 young women in the U.S. suffer from an eating disorder.9

Furthermore, one study on substance abuse among women with anorexia10 reports that approximately 50% of people with eating disorders misuse alcohol or illegal substances. Eating disorders and substance addiction actually have several risk factors in common: family history, low self-esteem, brain chemistry, depression, and stress. Many teen and young adult rehabs offer programs that treat clients who have one or both of these conditions.

Recreational and Adventure Therapies

It’s common for teen and young adult treatment programs to place a strong emphasis on activities-based experiential therapies. Activities you’ll often find at these programs range from outdoor excursions that test participants’ limits, to learning life skills through gardening, to expressing creativity through music and art.

While these are more fun and engaging for young people than traditional talk therapy alone, they also provide important opportunities for them to connect with themselves and put new skills into practice.

Young people in these programs can discover what it’s like to feel good in healthy ways, through things like learning a new sport or spending time in nature. Behavioral health experts agree that this can have a long-term influence on their sobriety and health. According to one study of teen rehab clients’ long-term outcomes, “continued physical health for recovered teenage drug users11 is critical…because it may improve the success of rehabilitation.”

Family Counseling

Adolescent drug misuse affects the entire family. That’s why, according to specialists studying the impact of substance abuse on families,12 “treating only the individual with the active disease of addiction is limited in effectiveness.” When clients have supportive parents, siblings, or other family members, it’s critical that they participate in the healing process.

Adolescent rehab programs typically provide some form of family counseling, which many clients find beneficial to their treatment experience. Sometimes, loved ones join treatment sessions through video conferencing. Other rehabs invite family members to stay with clients for a short time during the program. And programs may offer an arrangement where family members can stay onsite or nearby and participate in addiction education workshops and other activities alongside their teen.

Some rehabs may restrict clients’ communication with others outside their treatment plan. Cell phone use is frequently limited or banned during treatment in some programs. Others may restrict calls or visits at the start of the program, but allow outside interaction once a certain amount of time has passed. If maintaining contact with your child during treatment is important to you, make sure to ask your rehab about their policy on device use and communication.

Exploring New Opportunities for Healing

Adolescence is a formative time. Teens will gradually learn more about themselves as they grow, defining their identities, aspirations, values, and desires. Connecting them to appropriate help when challenges arise is vital.

Substance abuse disorders are serious for people of any age. Exploring the different treatment programs available to your teens is a great place to start the healing process. For information including treatments offered, client experiences, staff qualifications and more, search teen and young adult rehabs here.