Empathy with Boundaries

Having empathy for people you love, and even those you don’t know, is important to form and maintain deep relationships. Learning healthy empathy and setting boundaries can help keep positive relationships between you and your loved ones.

Dr. Kristen Neff1, an expert in empathy and self-compassion, dives into this topic through her research. She wrote a book called Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself2 about these ideas and created a program called Mindful Self-Compassion to help people live aligned with their goals, motivations, and happiest selves.

Using her research as a basis, you can learn to set boundaries, practice self-compassion, and care for your loved ones and your well-being.

Why Is It Important to Set Boundaries?

Boundaries are the emotional, physical, and mental limits you can establish to maintain your well-being. You can, and should, set boundaries with everyone from your spouse to the stranger on the street. 

By creating boundaries, you can prioritize what’s most important to you by aligning your thoughts and actions with your values. Identifying and communicating your needs can boost your emotional and mental well-being. And knowing your limits can also reduce stress, which can directly improve your physical health3.

Boundaries are not only important for yourself, but also for others. Boundaries foster respect and clear communication, which ensures that you and the other person are comfortable and feel seen, creating a stronger, healthier relationship. 

Balancing Empathy and Boundaries

Empathy allows you to understand and share another person’s feelings. It plays an important role in connecting with others, viewing experiences with a new perspective, and developing a deep understanding of yourself in the process.

Striking the balance between practicing empathy while maintaining personal boundaries can take some refining. It’s great to show empathy to others; however, some people may take advantage of that. Without boundaries, your empathy may overextend to the point of emotional burnout4. You may say “yes” to things you don’t want to, avoid conflict even when it’s necessary, and absorb others’ negative emotions.

Boundaries can provide a resolution. Expressing your feelings, acting on your values, and listening to your body are all ways to practice self-respect. Supporting others begins with supporting yourself.

Kristin Neff’s Approach to Balancing Empathy, Self-Compassion, and Boundaries

Dr. Neff’s work centers around the concept of self-compassion, which is treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. The 3 elements of self-compassion5 include 

  1. Being kind to yourself rather than judging, even if you make a mistake
  2. Recognizing that it’s part of the human experience to go through difficult times
  3. Practicing mindfulness in how your thoughts, feelings, and actions may positively or negatively impact your well-being

Utilizing this concept, Dr. Neff believes that prioritizing your mental, physical, and emotional health is essential to provide empathy and help to others. In fact, Kristen Neff’s research proved that when practicing self-compassion, you can be in a better position to help someone else6. When you are in a stable, happy state, you may be better at supporting loved ones. 

Setting boundaries can prioritize and protect your well-being. You can learn ways to recognize what your boundaries are, how to communicate them, and how to practice them, so you can be the best you can be for the other person and yourself.  

Strategies for Implementing Empathy with Boundaries

You can practice these techniques to honor your well-being and boundaries:

  1. Identify how much time, energy, and emotional support you can offer without compromising your mental health. This will set the basis for your boundaries. 
  2. Clearly communicate your boundaries to your loved ones. Describe ways that you will be able to show up for them. You may say,
    1. “I want to support you, but this is a difficult topic for me to talk about right now. Can we revisit it when I’m in a better headspace?”
    2. “I have a lot on my plate right now and need to focus on work. I won’t be available for social plans until the weekend. I hope you understand.”
  3. Practicing mindfulness7 can help you navigate others’ emotional responses. You’ll learn to be present with others’ emotions, while still honoring your own to avoid being overwhelmed.
  4. Keep some emotional distance. You can recognize and understand others’ feelings without absorbing them by realizing their emotions are their responsibility.
  5. Practice saying no when necessary. Establish clear limits on what you can take on, and recognize when additional commitments might hurt your well-being.

How Empathy with Healthy Boundaries can Change Your Life

Implementing boundaries can transform your relationships with loved ones and yourself. In addition to emotional health, you may foster greater resilience by staying true to your boundaries. Communicating your boundaries can hone your communication skills and help you be more open with others. And you may develop healthier, more authentic relationships. 

Find Additional Resources

You can browse Kristen Neff’s self-compassion exercises8 to see how self-kindness is the first step towards setting your boundaries. 

If you’re looking to learn more about how you can support yourself, or how you can care for others in need, visit our resource library.

25 Recovery Quotes for the Christmas Season

Although addiction has no yearly time frame, the holidays can be a hard time for people with an addiction, those in recovery from substance use disorders, and their loved ones. Staying aware of recovery-related topics can help ensure that each family member or friend feels comfortable to celebrate. Discover recovery words of wisdom to inspire you this holiday season.

Recovery Quotes

Quote #1 

“Forgiving yourself, believing in yourself, and choosing to love yourself are the best gifts one could receive.” ― Brittany Burgunder

Quote #2 

“I am not defined by my relapses, but in my decision to remain in recovery despite them.” ― Anonymous 

Quote #3 

“Believe you can, and you’re halfway there.” ― Theodore Roosevelt

Quote #4

“Be stronger than your strongest excuse. Be greater than your most negative voice.”

― Alan Maiccon

Quote #5

“The best way to predict your future is to create it.” ― Abraham Lincoln

Quote #6

“It’s the days you have every right to break down and fall apart, yet choosing to show up anyway is what matters most. Don’t diminish the small steps that others can’t see.” ― Brittany Burgunder

Quote #7

“I am a great believer in luck, and I find that the harder I work the more luck I have.” ― Thomas Jefferson 

Quote #8

“Courage isn’t having the strength to go on―it is going on when you don’t have strength.” ― Napoléon Bonaparte

Quote #9

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” ― Confucius

Quote #10

“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” ― J.K. Rowling

Quote #11

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Quote #12

“One of the hardest things was learning that I was worth recovery.” ― Demi Lovato

Quote #13

“Change your thoughts, change your life.” ― Lao Tzu

Quote #14

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.” ― Robert Louis Stevenson

Quote #15

”At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s keeping you together. ” ― Anonymous

Quote #16

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.” ― Mark Twain

Quote #17

“Recovery is hard. Regret is harder.” ― Brittany Burgunder

Quote #18

“Every worthy act is difficult. Ascent is always difficult. Descent is easy and often slippery.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

Quote #19

“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” ― Alice Walker

Quote #20

“Don’t let the past steal your present.” ― Terri Guillemets

Quote #21

“Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.” ― C.S. Lewis

Quote #22

“Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.” ― Charlotte Whitton

Quote #23

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” ― Lao Tzu

Quote #24

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” ― Albert Einstein

Quote #25

“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” ― Henry Ford

Recover in Love

Whether it’s the holiday season or not, you can always prioritize healing. Discover the best version of yourself by exploring and connecting with rehabs near you.

Bipolar Disorder I vs. II: Understanding the Difference

Bipolar disorder is a mental health condition characterized by extreme mood swings that impact your energy levels and activity patterns. There are 2 primary subtypes: bipolar I and bipolar II, each with its distinct characteristics. Understanding the differences between bipolar I vs. bipolar II is crucial for effectively diagnosing and managing this disorder so you can find a path to stability and emotional well-being. 

Let’s look at the differences between these 2 subtypes: their symptoms, effects on daily life, and treatment options. 

Types of Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder is a complex mental health condition characterized by extreme shifts in mood, energy, and activity levels. While there are several types of bipolar disorder, each shares the common feature of these mood swings. 

Here’s a general overview of the most common types:

Bipolar I Disorder

Bipolar I disorder entails manic episodes,1 which are periods of heightened energy, intense euphoria, and impulsive behavior. These episodes of mania often alternate with depressive episodes, which are marked by overwhelming sadness, fatigue, and a loss of interest in activities your normally enjoy. People with bipolar I disorder may experience severe manic episodes that can lead to psychosis, during which they lose touch with reality. 

The swings between manic and depressive states can be dramatic and disruptive to daily life. If you’re concerned that you might have bipolar, it’s important to get an accurate diagnosis so you can start to treat it effectively. 

Bipolar II Disorder

Bipolar II disorder differs from bipolar I in the severity and duration of manic episodes. In bipolar II, people experience hypomanic episodes,2 which are less extreme than full-blown manic episodes. While hypomania may include increased energy and creativity, it’s typically less disruptive and intense than mania. People with bipolar II tend to be depressed more often, which can cause emotional distress and impair your ability to function. Accurate diagnosis and treatment are essential for managing the cycle between hypomania and periods of depression. Untreated bipolar II can significantly impact your day-to-day life.

Cyclothymic Disorder

Cyclothymic disorder is a milder form of bipolar disorder3 marked by chronic mood disturbances. Unlike bipolar I and II, cyclothymia involves less severe mood swings. But it is chronic, and usually lasts for at least 2 years in adults. People with cyclothymia cycle through recurrent periods of hypomania and depressive symptoms. And while the mood swings in cyclothymia aren’t as extreme as in other forms of bipolar, they can still disrupt your daily life and relationships. It’s important to note that cyclothymic disorder can progress into bipolar I or II if left untreated,4 making early intervention and treatment vital for long-term well-being.

Is Bipolar Disorder I More Severe Than Bipolar Disorder II?

One of the common questions people have about bipolar disorder I vs. II is which type is more severe. 

The distinction between these 2 disorders has to do with the intensity of manic episodes. People with bipolar disorder I experience full-blown manic episodes,5 which can be more extreme, disruptive, and potentially lead to psychosis, making it crucial to receive timely treatment. While bipolar disorder II is sometimes considered a milder form of bipolar, it can still significantly impact your life due to the frequency of major depressive episodes. The severity of either disorder depends on a number of factors, including your specific experiences and the degree to which your symptoms interfere with your daily functioning.

Both bipolar I and II can cause significant challenges in managing emotions, relationships, and daily life. What matters most is that you receive the right treatment to address your specific needs—whether it’s mood stabilization, therapy, medication, or a combination of approaches. With quality care and support, people with any type of bipolar disorder can achieve stability, manage their symptoms, and lead fulfilling lives.

What Is the Difference Between Bipolar I and Bipolar II?

Bipolar I and bipolar II are distinct subtypes of bipolar disorder. While they share similarities, they differ in critical ways. 

Mania vs. Hypomania

One of the primary distinctions is the nature of manic and hypomanic episodes. In bipolar 1 disorder, people experience manic episodes of intense euphoria, impulsivity, and heightened energy. These episodes are often severe, disruptive, and can even lead to psychosis in some cases, which requires hospitalization. 

Bipolar II disorder features hypomanic episodes, which are milder and shorter than mania. While hypomania also involves increased energy, it’s generally less intense and disruptive to daily life. Hospitalization due to hypomania is rare. In fact, according to the DSM-5 criteria for hypomanic episodes,6

“The episode is not severe enough to cause marked impairment in social or occupational functioning or to necessitate hospitalization. If there are psychotic symptoms, the episode is, by definition, manic.”

Impact on Daily Life

The impact on daily life also varies between these 2 subtypes. Bipolar I tends to have a more significant impact because of the severity of manic episodes, which can lead to reckless behavior and seriously impair functioning. The depressive episodes that follow can be equally debilitating. 

In bipolar II, the impact on daily life stems from more prevalent and longer-lasting depressive episodes. Although people with hypomania may behave impulsively, it’s typically less disruptive than full mania. 

Differences in Bipolar Disorder Symptoms: I vs. II

Bipolar disorders I have some symptoms in common, like depressive episodes. But their main distinction is the severity and nature of manic or hypomanic symptoms. In bipolar I disorder, people experience full-blown manic episodes which are often followed by profound depressive episodes. Bipolar II disorder features hypomanic episodes and more frequent depressive episodes.

The main distinction between bipolar disorder I vs. II is the presence of either mania or hypomania:7 

Mania Symptoms

  • Elevated or irritable mood
  • Racing thoughts
  • Less need for sleep
  • Heightened energy and restlessness
  • Impulsivity and poor judgment
  • Grandiosity or inflated self-esteem
  • Engaging in risky behaviors (e.g. excessive spending or substance abuse)
  • Talkativeness and rapid speech
  • Difficulty focusing
  • Agitation and irritability
  • Hallucinations or delusions (in severe cases)
  • Disorganized thinking and behavior

Hypomania Symptoms

  • Elevated mood or increased happiness
  • Increased creativity and productivity
  • Enhanced energy and motivation
  • Reduced need for sleep without feeling fatigued
  • Increased talkativeness and sociability
  • Heightened self-confidence and self-esteem
  • Mild impulsivity (usually without severe consequences)
  • Improved focus and attention
  • A sense of optimism and positivity
  • Increased goal-directed activity
  • More engagement in pleasurable activities
  • Generally less severe and disruptive than full manic symptoms

Bipolar I vs. II Treatment

While bipolar disorder 1 and 2 share certain treatment approaches, they also have different considerations based on the nature of manic or hypomanic episodes. Both subtypes of the disorder usually involve a combination of medication and talk therapy8 to manage symptoms and promote stability.

Medication

In general, treatment for both bipolar I and II includes mood stabilizers, such as lithium, anticonvulsants, or atypical antipsychotic medications, to help regulate mood swings. Bipolar I may require more intensive medication management and monitoring due to the severity of manic episodes and the potential for psychosis. 

Talk Therapy 

Psychotherapy plays a crucial role in teaching people living with bipolar disorder coping skills, how to recognize triggers, and strategies to manage mood episodes. Mental health professionals often use approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and psychoeducation with this disorder.

Lifestyle Changes

Changes to daily routines, like maintaining a regular sleep schedule, reducing stress, and avoiding alcohol and drug use, are also essential to recovery.

While treatment approaches for both bipolar type 1 and 2 have similarities, it’s essential that your provider tailors your care to your specific symptoms and needs. Accurate diagnosis and an individualized treatment for bipolar disorder plan can help you effectively manage your bipolar disorder—and, ultimately, help you enjoy life.

Find Bipolar Disorder Treatment Centers

Living with bipolar disorder is challenging, but a comprehensive treatment program and ongoing support can help you do so in the best way possible. Finding the right provider is the first step towards a better life: search for bipolar disorder treatment centers that match your criteria, including location, insurance accepted, and more. 


Frequently Asked Questions About Bipolar Disorder I vs. II

What are the common types of bipolar disorder?

Bipolar disorder includes several types, with bipolar I and bipolar II being the most common. Bipolar I features full manic and depressive episodes, while bipolar II involves less severe hypomanic episodes and depressive episodes. There’s also cyclothymic disorder, which is milder but chronic.

What are the key differences in symptoms between bipolar disorder I and bipolar disorder II?

The main difference lies in the nature of manic or hypomanic symptoms. Bipolar I involves full-blown mania with severe symptoms, while bipolar II features hypomania, which is less intense. Depressive episodes are also more frequent in bipolar II. Both subtypes usually require mood stabilization medication and psychotherapy.

How is bipolar disorder I vs. bipolar disorder II treated?

Treatment for both bipolar I and bipolar II often includes mood-stabilizing medication and talk therapy. Working with a treatment team to get an accurate diagnosis and create an individualized treatment plan is crucial for managing bipolar so you can live a healthy fulfilling life.

How to Help Someone Who Is Suicidal

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call 911 or visit the nearest emergency room. If the person is not currently in crisis, talk to a mental health professional, a helpline, or emergency services in your country. Many countries have crisis helplines that offer support and assistance to individuals in distress. The United States Suicide Hotline is 988, and the US number to message for a crisis text line is 741741. If you live outside of the United States, you can find your country’s emergency number in this list.

If you are supporting someone close to you who is struggling with suicidal thoughts, it is essential to take a sensitive and earnest approach. There can be many underlying factors that contribute to suicidal ideation, and seeking expert assistance is always strongly recommended.

What Are the Signs of Suicide?

Recognizing warning signs of suicidality can save a life. While these signs are unique to each person, some common ones that might indicate a person is experiencing suicidal thoughts include:

Sign #1: Expressing thoughts of hopelessness or having no reason to live

Sign #2: Talking about wanting to die or kill oneself

Sign #3: Engaging in reckless behavior or taking unnecessary risks

Sign #4: Withdrawing from social activities and isolating oneself from others

Sign #5: Exhibiting extreme mood swings or displaying sudden changes in behavior

Sign #6: Expressing feelings of being trapped or having no way out of a situation

Sign #7: Giving away personal belongings or making final arrangements

Sign #8: Increased use of alcohol or drugs

Sign #9: Sudden improvement or calmness following a period of depression or sadness (this may indicate a decision to attempt suicide)

Sign #10: A final goodbye conversation

Suicidal Thoughts Vs. Suicidal Ideation

Suicidal ideation and suicidal thoughts are intertwined concepts that have distinct characteristics. While both involve contemplating suicide, they differ in terms of the depth of the thought process and the amount of planning involved.

Suicidal thoughts are any thoughts of ending your life. This is usually less intense than ideation and is just a more general feeling of not wanting to live. Someone experiencing this could find a successful recovery in outpatient or residential treatment. If you know someone with suicidal thoughts, call 911 or 988. You can also text the US crisis text line: 741741.

Suicidal ideation is a thought-out suicide plan. The thoughts leading up to this are usually more intense and persistent and include a chosen method, timing, and specific actions they’re going to take. Someone with suicidal ideation should receive care in an inpatient setting, either at a hospital or a rehabilitation center. If you know someone has a plan and resources to commit suicide, call 911 and/or visit the nearest emergency room.

What Are Ways to Help Someone Who Is Suicidal? 

If someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, take their situation seriously and provide support. You can be an invaluable source of guidance and comfort for them during their recovery journey; however, it is important to remember that it is essential to find professional help.

Help Keep Them Safe

If you believe the person is in immediate danger, do not leave them alone. Try to remove any items from their space that they could use for self-harm or suicide. Develop a safety plan that outlines steps they can take when they experience suicidal feelings or distress. Include emergency contacts, coping strategies, and resources they can turn to for support.

Encourage Professional Help

Encourage your loved one to seek professional help. You can help them find appropriate resources, make appointments, or accompany them to appointments if they are comfortable with you joining. Give them information about suicide prevention hotlines that they can contact for immediate support.

Offer Hope 

Offering hope to someone who is suicidal can be a powerful way to support them during a difficult time. Share recovery stories and celebrate any progress they make, no matter how small. Encourage them to envision a future where things can improve. And explore their goals and dreams with them.

Follow-Up 

After the initial intervention, continue to check in on them regularly. Knowing that someone cares and is available to listen can be very comforting. If allowed, check in with their care team to ensure they’re following through with their safety and treatment plans.

How to Talk to Someone Who Is Suicidal

Talking to someone who is suicidal can be an opportunity to show your empathy, patience, and understanding. For this conversation, find a quiet and private space. Approach the conversation with a calm and non-judgmental attitude. Show that you genuinely care and want to listen. And be clear that you’re concerned about them.

Encourage them to share their feelings and thoughts by asking open-ended questions like, “can you tell me what you’ve been going through?” or “how have you been feeling lately?” 

Acknowledge their feelings by saying “Tell me how you are feeling, I want to hear you,” or “I am here for you. Tell me how I can help you.” If you feel comfortable, ask them if they’re feeling suicidal, so that you know what type of support to get them. Empathize with what they’re experiencing—they’ll be more likely to trust you for help.

Be patient with your loved one. They are going through a challenging time, so let them talk at their own pace. Stay calm and collected when they tell you about their feelings. Make sure they know that you’re there for them and that they don’t have to go through this alone. Remind them that seeking help is a positive step.

Where to Get Help for Suicide?

Finding Immediate Help

Help is always available. If someone is in a life-threatening situation, call 911 and/or take them to an emergency room and stay with the person until they have medical help. If you live outside of the United States, you can find your country’s emergency number in this list.

Call a Hotline

If your loved one is currently safe, you can call the United States Suicide Hotline: 988. The number provides 24/7, confidential support to anyone in crisis. Another number to call is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) or text “HOME” to 741741 to connect with a trained crisis counselor via text message.

Find a Mental Health Professional

Once you have assured your loved one’s safety and have talked with a hotline and/or doctor, you can consult a mental health professional, like a psychiatrist, psychologist, or therapist, to develop their treatment plan. If you are having trouble finding an available professional, go to your primary care physician first. They can refer you to the appropriate person. 

Talk Therapy

Mental health professionals are trained to help people with suicidal thoughts. They can provide therapy, medication management, and coping strategies. Talk therapy may be a big part of their recovery plan. 

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and psychodynamic therapy are just some of the therapies they might participate in. Therapy can help your loved one develop coping skills, challenge negative thought patterns, and improve their emotional regulation.

Medication Management

In some cases, doctors may prescribe medication to address underlying mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety, or bipolar disorder. They might prescribe antidepressants, mood stabilizers, or anti-anxiety medications. For the best results, use prescribed medication management with talk therapy.

Support Network

Finally, rally a support network for your loved one. This is essential to keep them on the track to recovery. Kind words of compassion and motivation to keep going can help them on their journey. 

Additional Support for Suicide 

If your loved one needs intensive care for suicide, then a residential rehab that treats suicidality or an inpatient psychiatric hospital may be the best fit for them. Here, they will have 24/7 support and supervision from trained nurses and professionals. They’ll be able to grow and heal in a safe environment, separate from the triggers in their daily lives. 

These programs offer a variety of therapeutic interventions, including individual therapy, group therapy, family therapy, and psychoeducation. Therapists address the underlying issues contributing to suicidal thoughts and work on building healthy coping skills. They will also create a safety plan.

After completing the residential program, clients typically transition to outpatient care. A thorough discharge plan ensures a smooth transition and ongoing support.
Recovery is possible. Healing is possible. If you know someone that needs help, call 911 or the United States Suicide Hotline: 988.

What Is Binge Eating?

Binge eating involves recurring episodes of eating large amounts of food in a short amount of time. Recognizing the signs of binge eating is important because it has physical, mental, and societal effects. 

Your mental and physical health can deteriorate from binging episodes. Those who struggle with binge eating often experience intense guilt, shame, and distress, which can negatively impact self-esteem and well-being. Usually there’s a deeper root cause, like something emotionally-driven, behind your binging episodes. And eating large amounts of food can lead to significant weight gain and related health problems.

Caring about your health, and taking steps to improve it, is essential for your well-being. Prioritizing your health can empower you to lead a fulfilling life and positively impact your loved ones and communities.

Defining Binge Eating

The DSM-51 defines binge eating disorder (BED) as “eating, in a discrete amount of time (e.g., within any 2-hour period), an amount of food that is definitely larger than what most people would eat in a similar period of time under similar circumstances.”

Often, those with BED feel a lack of control when they’re binging. And sometimes, they’ll eat alone because they’re embarrassed or disgusted by how much they eat.

BED occurs frequently. Overeating to the point of feeling uncomfortably full may be distinct from BED, as the episodes do not occur as often. If these episodes are followed by purging behaviors such as self-induced vomiting or excessive laxative use, you may be diagnosed with Bulimia Nervosa.

Symptoms and Signs of Binge Eating

Common behavioral indicators of BED include:

  • Eating faster than normal during an episode
  • Eating until uncomfortably full
  • Eating a large amount of food, even when you’re not hungry
  • Feeling ashamed of your binge eating, and often hiding it from others
  • Often choosing to eat high-calorie foods that are rich in fats and sugars
  • Hoarding food

Emotional signs of BED include:

  • Feeling a loss of control over your eating
  • Emotional distress
  • Emotional numbing
  • Obsession with weight/body image

Causes and Risk Factors

While no one thing leads to binge eating disorder, various influences can trigger its onset. That’s why looking at this disorder with a multifaceted approach is so important.

Biological Factors

While you may think these eating patterns are something you can easily stop on your own, BED mirrors the neurobiology of substance use disorder3. Palatable foods, along with drugs and alcohol, can change your brain. 

Eating sugary and fatty foods increases endogenous opioid activity in the brain, and over time this binging cycle can alter the opioid system, just like with substance addiction. Additionally, activating the dopamine system can temporarily relieve stress, and eating these foods can do just that. However, this can lead to food, or substance, addiction which can also change your brain chemistry.

The gut-brain axis is the bidirectional communication between the gastrointestinal system and the brain4. Emerging research suggests that gut microbiota composition and function may influence food cravings, mood, and eating behaviors, potentially contributing to binge eating tendencies.

Emotional Triggers

Emotional triggers can play a role in BED, too. Those with binge eating disorder often reach for food when they’re feeling uncomfortable emotions like stress, loneliness, and sadness. This happens because you think you’re craving food, when in reality you’re lacking something emotional, like security, control, warmth, excitement, or love. Unfortunately, food does not compensate for these non-negotiable emotional needs.

Socio-cultural Influences

Socio-cultural influences play a significant role in shaping body image ideals, dieting behaviors, and the development of binge eating tendencies. Some key socio-cultural factors that contribute to this include:

  • Media: Thin, idealized bodies we see in the media contribute to unrealistic beauty standards.
  • Peers: Peer pressure, comparisons, and social acceptance can contribute to body dissatisfaction and a desire to conform to certain appearance standards.
  • Diet culture: This culture claims thinness equals health and moral superiority. It emphasizes strict dieting, weight loss, and the pursuit of an “ideal” body shape.
  • Accessibility to food: Limited access to affordable, nutritious foods may lead to reliance on cheap, energy-dense foods, which can contribute to weight gain and disordered eating patterns.
  • Cultural and gender expectations: Cultural ideals and gender expectations can influence body image and eating behaviors differently across societies. For example, certain cultures may value larger body sizes as a symbol of beauty and fertility, while others may prioritize thinness.
socio cultural influences for binge eating disorder

Consequences of Binge Eating

Binge eating can have significant physical health implications, particularly when it leads to obesity and related medical conditions. It can result in:

  • Type 2 diabetes
  • Cardiovascular disease
  • Gastrointestinal problems
  • Sleep apnea
  • Joint problems
  • Respiratory issues

Aside from physical health, BED can take a toll on you emotionally. There is a relationship between binge eating and anxiety and depression because binging is often used as an escape from these complicated feelings. You may also experience low self-esteem and guilt because of your eating habits.

Binge eating can impact your overall quality of life. It can strain relationships because your embarrassment could lead you to isolate yourself or avoid social situations that involve food. It could also impact your work or hobbies because of the fatigue, reduced concentration, and emotional distress that comes with BED.

Addressing binge eating through treatment and support can help you improve your relationships, social life, and overall quality of life. Therapy, support groups, and developing positive coping mechanisms can promote a healthier relationship with food, enhance self-esteem, and facilitate meaningful connections with others.

Diagnosis and Treatment

According to the DSM-51, BED is diagnosed by  

  • According to the DSM-51, BED is diagnosed by 
  • Eating a larger than normal amount of food in a discrete period of time
  • A lack of control during these binging periods 
  • 3 or more of the following:
  • Eating more rapidly than normal
  • Eating until feeling uncomfortably full
  • Eating large amounts of food when not hungry
  • Eating alone because of embarrassment when binging around others
  • Feeling shame and depressed after binging
  • Marked distress about the binging
  • Episodes occurring 1+ times per week for 3+ months
  • The binge eating not being followed by purging behaviors

If you think that you or someone you know may have BED, it is important to seek help from a healthcare professional. A proper diagnosis can guide the creation of your treatment plan, and early intervention can significantly improve outcomes and quality of life.

Therapy for BED

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective treatment for binge eating disorder (BED)4. It addresses the underlying thoughts, emotions, and behaviors associated with binge eating. CBT aims to challenge and modify unhelpful thoughts and beliefs, and it helps you develop alternative coping strategies. It’s also beneficial for co-occurring disorders like anxiety or depression because CBT is a widely recognized treatment for many mental health disorders5

Interpersonal therapy (IPT) is another evidence-based approach used for BED treatment. IPT focuses on addressing interpersonal issues and improving relationships to reduce binge eating behaviors. This could look like learning to cope with emotions like stress, sadness, or anger in healthier ways, in turn relying less on food as a way to deal with them.

Strategies for Coping with Binge Eating

While professional treatment is the most important component for recovery, building a healthy relationship with food and practicing mindful eating can help you along your journey.

This can look like paying attention to your body’s hunger and fullness cues, mindful eating where you slow down eating and pay attention to the food sensations, stocking your kitchen with nutritious foods, and striving for a flexible, non-restrictive approach to eating.

If your BED is triggered by stress, developing effective stress management techniques can help you navigate a trigger before the binge starts. This could be deep breathing exercises, getting adequate sleep, exercising, and positive self-talk. 

Finally, seek support from friends, family, or support groups. Sharing your feelings and experiences with trusted individuals can provide comfort and perspective. And engaging in social activities and maintaining healthy relationships can also help reduce stress levels and manage your BED.

Prevention and Long-Term Management

Building a healthy relationship with food and your body is the best way to prevent BED. You can adopt balanced eating patterns that include a variety of nutrient-rich foods. There are no “good” and “bad” foods, all food is fuel. So allow yourself to have those treats without feeling guilty. Being unrestrictive can help you sustain a healthy diet.

BED develops not just because of your eating habits but also from your emotional well-being and coping strategies. Keeping yourself mentally healthy is just as important as being physically healthy. Find positive ways to cope with stress, boredom, or difficult emotions that do not involve turning to food. You can exercise, practice mindfulness, engage in creative outlets, or spend time with loved ones.

Ongoing self-care and self-compassion will be key in your journey. Set boundaries, validate your emotions, and create goals. Growth and being the best version of yourself doesn’t come from being your harshest critic. It comes from being your biggest supporter and talking to yourself like a best friend.

You have the potential to be the happiest and healthiest version of yourself. See where professional help and positive lifestyle changes can take you by browsing our list of eating disorder treatment options

How to Help Someone Who Has Relapsed on Drugs or Alcohol

Relapse involves drinking alcohol or using drugs again after abstinence or successful recovery. Like other chronic diseases, addiction relapse is always possible. Relapse can happen at any time in the recovery process, including early stages or even after long periods of sobriety.

When relapse does happen, your loved one will need all the support you can provide. If you know someone who has relapsed, there are ways you can help. Your help can make a big difference in their life. Browse rehabs specializing in chronic relapse to give you an idea of how to help your loved one continue their recovery journey.

Understanding Relapse

In addiction recovery, relapse can often be part of the overall process rather than a failure. Addiction is a chronic condition1, and relapse does not mean that your loved one’s recovery is impossible. Instead, relapse provides an opportunity for learning and growth. 

This journey can help them identify triggers and areas that need attention in their recovery. Be aware of these common things that trigger relapse:

  • Environmental cues: Specific locations, objects, smells, or even certain people associated with their previous substance use can be powerful triggers.
  • Co-occurring disorders: People with addiction often have underlying mental health conditions2 such as anxiety, depression, or trauma. If these co-occurring disorders are not properly addressed and treated, they can significantly increase the risk of relapse.
  • Stress: High levels of stress can weaken their ability to cope and make them more vulnerable to relapse.
  • Unhealthy coping mechanisms: If they haven’t developed healthy and effective coping mechanisms to deal with stress, manage emotions, or solve problems, your loved one might resort to their addictive behaviors as a way to cope with stressors.

Recognizing Signs of Relapse

Signs of addiction relapse can manifest in various ways, depending on the individual and their specific addiction. Here are some common signs to be aware of, so you can hopefully address this issue early on:

  • Behavior changes: They may become secretive, defensive, or dishonest. They may also isolate themselves, withdraw from social activities, or show a lack of interest in things they used to enjoy.
  • Mood swings: Emotional instability, mood swings, and irritability are common signs of relapse. They might also be anxious, depressed, or angry.
  • Justification: If they’re on the verge of relapse, they may begin to rationalize their drinking or drug use again. 
  • Reconnecting with old using friends: Reconnecting with old friends who are still drinking or doing drugs is a red flag.
  • Loss of interest in recovery: A noticeable loss of interest or commitment to recovery can be an indicator of relapse. They might stop attending therapy or support group meetings or disregard their relapse prevention plan.

Communicating with Your Loved One About Their Relapse

Sometimes, it just takes the right person to help someone kick start their recovery. So when you’re helping your loved one through their relapse, work on showing empathy. Active listening without judgment can help them feel supported. Having a reliable ally can make a huge impact.

When having these conversations, timing is everything. First, make sure the person you are talking to is not under the influence of any substances during these conversations. Next, have conversations with this person in a calm and safe atmosphere. This will allow them to feel more relaxed and comfortable discussing their thoughts and feelings.

Blaming or criticizing them for their relapse can create defensiveness and hinder open communication. Instead, emphasize your support and understanding. Let them know that relapse doesn’t define their worth or undo the progress they’ve made so far.

Providing Emotional Support

Relapse can bring feelings of shame and guilt. Emotional support provides a safe space for your loved one to express their emotions and experiences without judgment. Feeling understood can help them recognize that they are not alone in their struggles. Sometimes, people just need to be heard without receiving immediate advice or solutions.

Creating a supportive and non-enabling environment for someone in addiction recovery is crucial for their well-being. After educating yourself on addiction and the recovery process, you can create a caring home for your loved one to come back to. You can also support them by adopting a healthy lifestyle that complements their recovery. Encourage regular exercise, nutritious eating, and adequate sleep. Offer to participate in activities together that provide alternative outlets for stress and anxiety.

Be mindful of enabling behaviors that inadvertently support their addiction. This can include providing financial support for their unhealthy lifestyle, making excuses for their behavior, or covering up the consequences of their actions. Instead, focus on supporting their recovery and encouraging self-sufficiency. And celebrate milestones because recognizing their progress reinforces their commitment and boosts their self-esteem.

Assisting with Treatment and Recovery

While relapse can be common, it’s still a tricky situation that requires immediate attention. After you talk to your loved one, and they agree to get treatment, you can help them find the best treatment for their needs. 

Whether this is their first relapse or not, residential rehab may be in the cards for them. Here, your loved one can separate from triggers and distractions in their day-to-day life and focus on recovery. They’ll likely participate in a variety of evidence-based therapies, like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). This will help them change any unhealthy thought patterns or behaviors that might’ve contributed to their relapse. And many rehab centers will offer holistic therapies and activities, like yoga, to help them connect their mind and body. 

Ongoing care will be important for your loved one. Outpatient treatment can help them transition back home while still providing some structure. They’ll continue building vital coping skills for stress and negative feelings, without using substances. And outpatient programs allow them to go to school or work. This is a great option for those who cannot fully give up those commitments.

Reconnecting with support networks, such as support groups or 12-Step programs like AA or NA, can be a helpful piece of their journey, too. You can even offer to help them find these groups or attend them, too, if they feel comfortable with that. Being part of a supportive community can provide valuable insights, encouragement, and accountability during the recovery process. And they can lean on others for support who have been in similar circumstances.

Setting Boundaries

Boundaries can help maintain a healthy relationship dynamic and prevent enabling behaviors. For example, you can express that you won’t participate in activities or situations that enable their addiction, but you’ll support their recovery efforts. You can encourage their recovery efforts by helping them find appropriate treatment, celebrating milestones, and staying consistent with your support. Boundaries help create a healthy and balanced dynamic while providing a framework for sustainable progress.

Not only is setting boundaries during their recovery important for your loved one, but this is also essential for you. Supporting someone in addiction recovery can be emotionally demanding. Take care of yourself by setting healthy boundaries, seeking support from others, and practicing self-care. Your own well-being is crucial to being an effective support system.

Dealing with Relapse Triggers

Identifying addiction relapse triggers is an important step in relapse prevention. You can find these by:

  • Paying attention to your loved one’s emotional cues (like mood swings)
  • Recognizing high-risk situations (their stressors)
  • Reflecting on their past relapses (what triggered them in the past?)

Developing healthy coping strategies can ease the impact of their triggers. For a while, drinking alcohol or using drugs was your loved one’s coping strategy, even though it was an unhealthy one. Finding positive ways to deal with stress can prevent a trigger from greatly affecting them.

Prevention is much easier than dealing with the after effects of relapse. You can help your loved one create a relapse prevention plan to maintain long-term recovery. This might include being aware of triggers, developing healthy coping mechanisms, building a support network, and making lifestyle changes.

Encouraging Continued Recovery

Your loved one will deal with uncomfortable feelings and situations for the rest of their life, just like all of us do. Creating sustainable habits to manage discomfort is key during their journey.

Motivation to continue their recovery comes from not only within, but also from others around them. Sometimes, they’ll need a “pick me up” from you or someone else, and that’s okay. The support network your loved one will build requires effort and reciprocity. Nurturing these relationships involves active listening, offering encouragement, and celebrating each other’s successes.
Recovery is a journey, and with the right support and treatment, your loved one can continue moving forward toward sustainable sobriety. Recovery is, in fact, possible. Explore centers that specialize in treating chronic relapse to open up new doors for you and your loved one.

Coming Out and Mental Health: Navigating the Emotional Journey

Coming out as a member of the LGBTQ+ community can feel daunting, liberating, scary, or all of the above. It can also have positive or negative impacts on your mental health, both of which you can navigate. 

Don’t feel like you need to follow a script, set of steps, or anything else to successfully come out. It’s up to you and what you’re comfortable with. You know your life and circumstances better than anyone else. 

But you do have resources for the journey and its emotional effects. 

Understanding Coming Out

The American Psychological Association defines coming out1 as, “self-awareness of same-sex attractions; the telling of one or a few people about these attractions; widespread disclosure of same-sex attractions; and identification with the lesbian, gay, and bisexual community.” 

For many, coming out shapes the rest of their lives. It can be one of the most significant journeys you ever face. For others, it’s not a big deal. It’s different for everyone, and that’s perfectly okay.

Challenges And Fears of Coming Out

A potent fear related to coming out is the possibility of rejection. Your loved ones could reject your core identity, and that would hurt. 

Social prejudices, misconceptions, and misguided views could also make coming out scary, both right away and in your future. Even if the reactions aren’t negative, they might not feel affirming, either. Both can hurt.

Picking the right time to come out can also feel like a challenge. When do you say it, and who do you tell? Should you tell one person, or a group of your friends and family? 

Only you can truly answer those questions. But the weight of wondering can affect your wellbeing. Drinking or using drugs could seem like a way to alleviate the stress. If you’re struggling with addiction, you can browse our list of LGBTQ+-affirming rehabs

Mental Health Considerations in Coming Out

Feeling unaccepted can lead to depression, anxiety, and even trauma. Society’s attitude towards the LGBTQ+ community can also cause minority stress2, which can exacerbate or cause mental health conditions. Some may experience chronic minority stress, which means they’re hypervigilant to possible discrimination, frequently worried about it, or carry internalized stigma of themselves. 

This stress, fear, grief, and trauma can create or worsen mental health conditions. It’s not hard to see why—but that’s not how the story has to go. 

The Impact of Attitudes And Acceptance on Mental Health

Coming out could relieve the emotional toll of hiding. When you come out, you won’t have to adjust your behaviors, actions, and words to hide who you really are. That can feel like a deep relief. 

But make sure you know how you feel about your identity. Take a deep and thoughtful search of your heart—what do you feel when you think about who you are? Internalized homophobia can add stress and shame to your coming out journey. As much as you’re able, try to find and challenge these feelings. 

Coming out can lead to self-acceptance, which can powerfully erase any internalized homophobia. And once you’ve accepted and embraced who you are, what others think might not matter so much. It’s okay and normal if it does. You have ways to navigate that, too. 

Mental Health Resources for the Coming Out Process

Many support groups, online chats, and other resources can help you through the coming-out process. Here’s a few:

  • PFLAG: A LGBTQ+ resource with 400 local chapters in America. Started in 1973, they were the first organization to offer help, education, and support to LGBTQ+ people and their families.
  • 988: They provide resources for LGBTQ+ people and a 24/7, nation-wide suicide crisis hotline. 
  • The Trevor Project: They’re the world’s largest crisis service for LGBTQ+ youth ages 25 and under. You can call, text, or chat the crisis interventionists here 24/7. 
  • Trans Lifeline: A crisis line for trans people that respects your rights and doesn’t use non-consensual interventions.
  • Pride Counseling: A specialized online counseling service for the LGBTQ+ community.
  • LGBT National Help Center: They provide a phone hotline for LGBTQ+ people of all ages to speak with an educated volunteer about identity struggles, coming out, and other concerns. 
comingout

Self-Care Strategies for Mental Well Being

Coming out likely won’t be completely stress-free, and that’s okay. Whether the stressor is big or small, you have ways to manage your emotions and improve your wellbeing. 

You can practice mindfulness and meditation when your emotions feel overwhelming. Try to identify the support you have in your life, too. The resources listed above definitely count as someone you can talk to when you feel overwhelmed.

Be sure to practice self-care, self-compassion, and self-acceptance as you plan and execute coming out. Don’t force yourself to follow what anyone else did, either. The way and time you come out is unique to you—try to take comfort in that. Here’s some other self-care steps you can take:

Your mentor could be someone who came out months or years ago. They can help you through the process and offer support from someone who’s really been there. 

To find one, you can connect to an openly queer person in your life. Even if they’re not able to help you throughout the whole process, it might help you to know that they know what you’re going through. If you don’t know any potential mentors, or don’t feel comfortable doing so, you can connect with others online. 

Building Resilience and Creating a Supportive Environment

A negative reaction to your identity will probably hurt. But you can manage that pain by building resilience and creating a supportive, safe environment for yourself.

The American Psychological Association suggests group environments build resilience3. Your group may be other LGTBQ+ people in your neighborhood, work, or school, or a more formalized LGBTQ+ gathering. All your group must do is offer support and bring you happiness to strengthen your recovery. 

A supportive environment will feel safe and accepting. For you, this might include your family, friends, or others in the LGBTQ+ community. It differs for everyone, and that’s okay. If your environment becomes unsupportive, consider leaving it, if you can. Mental health professionals can help you navigate this change. 

Resilience also ties into self-care. The healthier you are physically, the more prepared you’ll be to handle emotional challenges. Take care of your mind, too. That’s where meditation, journaling, and mindfulness come in.

Reach The Other Side of Your Rainbow

Coming out is your unique journey. It can come with stress, worry, and fear, even if you’re excited for the change. But you have help available along the way. 

Along the way, make sure to prioritize your mental health and well being. You can do so through therapy, engaging in support, and actively practicing self-care. 

And remember that your coming-out process is your own. If you think writing out a script will help, do it! If a video seems more helpful, or even baking a cake, do that! The path you take is up to you.

Good luck and be well.

The Connection Between Narcissism And Addiction

Narcissism can lead to addiction as a way to self-regulate and cope with shame or others’ apparent lack of admiration. Having a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) doesn’t mean you’ll automatically become addicted to something. But it can make it more likely.

If substance use has started affecting your life, you and your care team might decide on a rehab for narcissism and addiction.

What Is Narcissism?

The DSM-51 defines narcissistic personality disorder as a “pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy.” If someone with NPD doesn’t feel admired, they might turn to substances to cope with that pain. Here’s how narcissistic traits2 might look in someone with narcissistic personality disorder. 

  • They exaggerate their work or educational accomplishments. They may say they got a raise or a new job title but never did, or say they got into a prestigious college when they didn’t.
  • They often monologue and seem annoyed or disinterested when you try to speak. 
  • They believe they are highly special and should only associate with other people and places like them.
  • They expect others to perform favors and respond to their beck and call. If you don’t, they’ll likely get upset.
  • They don’t empathize with you and can’t seem to ever see things from your perspective.
  • They’re inappropriately arrogant or haughty.
  • They might seem jealous of your happiness and success, or assume you’re jealous of them.
  • You feel like they exploit or take advantage of you.

The behaviors of your friend, coworker, loved one, or partner with narcissism may seem strangely out of place or inappropriate. They might lie for no reason other than to gain perceived admiration. They may also belittle, manipulate, or abuse others to maintain their sense of entitlement and control. 

Types of Narcissism

The 3 subtypes of narcissism are: 

  • Grandiose narcissism3, which presents as overconfidence, arrogance, entitlement, and dominance in interpersonal relationships.
  • Vulnerable narcissism3, which presents as hypersensitivity, a tendency to avoid all conflict, extreme defensiveness, and a hidden desire for admiration.
  • Pathological narcissism4, which presents when vulnerable and grandiose narcissism co-occur (or happen at the same time).

Someone with any type of narcissism will need the admiration of others. If they don’t feel admired, they might turn to substances to cope with that pain. They may also use substances to regulate the intense emotions of NPD. 

The Impact of Narcissism on Interpersonal Relationships

Narcissism can strain or break relationships. Someone with narcissism will likely struggle to emphasize with others and reciprocate in relationships, which can damage the relationship. Some relationships, romantic or otherwise, eventually end for these reasons. 

But it’s not always easy to recognize narcissism in your friend, romantic partner, or coworker. People with NPD often radiate charisma and confidence at first. This can make them an attractive friend, partner, or boss. But that thin veil often lifts quickly.

In some situations, someone with NPD may emotionally, physically, or sexually abuse others in their life. This heavily impacts their ability to both make and keep healthy relationships. 

The Link Between Narcissism And Addiction

Understanding Addiction

The National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) defines addiction5 as “a chronic, relapsing disorder characterized by continued use despite negative consequences, and long-lasting changes in the brain.” Someone with an addiction may use a substance, like drugs or alcohol, or have a behavior addiction like gambling, shopping, and sex

Addiction can happen to anyone, but some risk factors can make it more likely. These include trauma, chronic pain, genetic susceptibility (parents or other relatives with addiction), and brain injuries, among others.  

Co-Occurring Narcissism And Addiction

Co-occurring narcissism and addiction presents a unique, but manageable, challenge. If you have both, you might be more aggressive and violent2. And since NPD instills a strong sense of superiority, you might not feel like anything could be wrong. The idea might even feel enraging. But addiction isn’t something you’re doing “wrong.” It’s just something you need help managing.

Both narcissism and addiction have compulsivity2 in common. Someone with narcissism will also repeat their actions despite negative consequences, like losing friends. Addiction, as defined, has that same aspect.

Why Do They Co-occur?

Research suggests general functional impairment, not narcissism itself, can cause addiction4. But the effects of narcissism can cause a higher likelihood to drink, or use drugs, or gamble. And the more likely you are to use substances, the more likely addiction becomes.

For example, you may drink or use drugs to lift your self-esteem, which you need to keep high due to your NPD. Doing so often enough can lead to addiction. Alcohol and drugs can also enhance your perception of boring people—people who don’t offer adequate admiration or who aren’t on your level of specialness. Altered mental states can mask shame too, whether it’s shame from not being admired or guilt for needing admiration.

Social media addiction, gambling, excessive spending, and excessive working have similar effects as substance use. That’s because they provide admiration4 (through posting on social media or getting a big win), lift unstable self-esteem, and can cover the shame of not feeling admired. 

The Impact of Addiction on Interpersonal Relationships

Addiction can cause someone to lie, steal, and become untrustworthy. It can strain relationships even without these issues present—watching a loved one suffer never feels okay. And trying to force someone to get help may feel like a losing battle. It’s frustrating for both sides. 

The effects of addiction could also cause you to lose your job, home, and finances. The prices of drugs and alcohol might mean your finances take a hit first, which could also cause strain in your home life, especially if you’re your family’s primary earner. As your addiction worsens, your job performance may as well, resulting in job loss. 

Addiction and narcissism don’t have all the same symptoms and causes, but they do connect in some ways.

Psychological Mechanisms of Addiction And Narcissism

Addiction can fill a narcissistic need for high self-esteem and self-worth. Drinking, using drugs, and shopping, for example, all release dopamine, which makes you feel good and reinforces repetition6. A narcissist’s need to feel good about themselves may drive their addictive behaviors. Or, they may use substances to even-out their emotional states. 

Some drugs, and alcohol especially, depress your central nervous system. This may feel nice if you feel out of control or like your emotions (good and bad) are too intense. 

In either case, you may use substances to cope with the negative effects of narcissism. Even for someone without narcissism, addiction presents a tempting “solution” to low self-esteem and self-confidence. So if you have a highly unstable sense of self-esteem, substance use can feel like an easy way to manage your confidence level. 

Social Factors 

Certain social factors contribute to addiction and narcissism. Growing up with inadequate or excessive praise can lead to narcissism2 in adults. Traits like aggression, poor tolerance of distress, and emotional dysregulation can also lead to narcissism. Childhood trauma or inherited genetics can cause these traits.

Growing up with addicted parents can make you more likely to have an addiction7, through both genetics and mimicry. Similarly, having a narcissistic parent can make you more likely to have NPD8. That’s because a narcissistic parent may overvalue their child, who then assumes they’re more important than everyone else, and that everyone thinks that too.

But despite the interpersonal and personal symptoms of each condition, you do have resources for recovery.

Treatment And Management

Treatment for narcissism and addiction must address both conditions at the same time. While narcissism has no standard treatment pathway8, certain modalities, like ongoing therapy and a positive therapist-patient relationship, play a positive role. 

Psychoanalytic therapy for narcissism8 focuses on the emotions you express towards your therapist—AKA, someone who’s trying to change or better you. Being in treatment may make you feel inferior and want to lash out. So, this therapy focuses on bringing those emotions to the surface and examining them empathetically.

Schema therapy addresses the unhelpful emotions of narcissism9. It’s an adaptation of cognitive behavioral therapy, which addresses the thoughts that lead to harmful behaviors like addiction. Schema therapy can help you regulate your self-esteem and self-worth without needing others to make you feel whole. 

In treatment for addiction and narcissism, providers address addiction, narcissism, and the underlying causes of each. You might start with detox, which safely removes substances from your body. Next, therapy helps you identify and address the causing factors of addiction and begin treating narcissism. After rehab, you’ll likely stay in outpatient therapy, which providers highly recommend to manage both narcissism and addiction. 
But first, you need to take the first step towards recovery. Do so by browsing our list of rehabs that treat addiction and narcissism to see pricing, photos, reviews and more.

Fawning as a Trauma Response: Understanding Its Effects and Coping Strategies

Fawning as a trauma response is the 4th theorized response to trauma and complex PTSD (c-PTSD). As defined1, “Fawn types seek safety by merging with the wishes, needs, and demands of others” and, “fawn types avoid emotional investment and potential disappointment by barely showing themselves.”

Fawns intrinsically believe they’ll need to forfeit their desires, boundaries, and rights1 to earn a relationship with someone. Childhood trauma/c-PTSD often causes the fawning response2, though later-life traumas can too. Psychoeducation and therapy can help fawns, and treatment providers, understand and overcome this response.  

Defining Fawning as a Trauma Response

Fawning was recognized fairly recently as a trauma response, adding to the better-known Fight, Flight, and Freeze responses. Fawns often grow up in an abusive home environment3 or with narcissistic parents. Fawns adapt to trauma by adhering to others’ needs. The usual narrative goes:

If I just do what they want, am always useful, exceed their expectations, and never cause conflict, I’ll be okay.”

While that tactic may have worked when they needed it to, fawning also puts many “fawns” in the paths of narcissists, abusers, and manipulative people. Since they feel unable or scared to say no, a fawn may fall victim to these domineering personalities. 

How Fawning Differs from Other Trauma Responses

You could also react to trauma with fight, flight, or freeze responses3.

  • Fight: When something triggers you, you’ll face the threat with yelling, physical or emotional aggression, crying, or attacking the source of the danger.
  • Flight: You’ll physically or emotionally flee from the perceived threat. If you can’t do either, you may feel extremely anxious, fidgety, and hyperarousal.
  • Freeze: Perceived danger could make you freeze up and lose control of your body. You may even black out as a way to completely avoid the danger.

Fawning, in contrast, has few or no physical signs. The person fawning may seem completely fine, not triggered at all. They might think they’re fine, too. But that emotional disconnect can become another way to deal with past and ongoing trauma. 

Early Triggers Leading to Fawning

Children may adapt to emotional, physical, or sexual abuse by submitting to their abuser and aiming to please4. As children, fawns also ignore their own needs, feelings, and boundaries to appease people of authority—usually their parents. This pattern often continues into adulthood.

For example, a hungry child may hold their tongue for fear their mother will lash out if they communicate their hunger. Or, a child may push down the anger of being ignored by their parents for fear of being ridiculed. Staying quiet and outwardly unbothered then becomes the safest course of action. 

Psychological Mechanisms of Fawning

To the fawn, fawning is their only means of staying safe. They consistently sacrifice their needs and boundaries for safety, which can lead them to believe the two can’t intertwine. That belief can lead to codependency in adulthood2 and a personality change. For example, a headstrong child may grow into a demure, people-pleasing adult. 

How Fawning Changes Attachment Styles

Instead of having a secure attachment style5, a fawn will likely gravitate towards fearful-avoidant styles. These styles describe someone who has a negative model of self and others. A fawn may crave intimate relationships but feel too afraid of pain and ridicule to maintain or initiate relationships. 

Pandering and people-pleasing can prevent fawns from forming secure, mutually beneficial friendships. Others who value the fawn’s thoughts and opinions may struggle to connect with someone who “mindlessly” agrees to their every whim. In contrast, a narcissistic person would enjoy a fawn’s ongoing agreeability. 

Fawning And c-PTSD

Childhood trauma is one of the forms of complex post-traumatic stress disorder (c-PTSD). Someone with c-PTSD will have distorted beliefs2 about themself: that they’re worthless, unimportant, small, and unworthy. So, they may fawn as an outward show of their unimportance compared to the importance of their abuser—hoping this juxtaposition will spare them harm.

A fawn may continue this long enough that it becomes part of who they are. 

Effects of Fawning on Individuals

Even if you’re no longer fawning as a trauma response, it can become part of your adult personality. Fawning can make you feel unheard, used, and unimportant. You may also feel confused since you don’t have a reason to fawn or want to stand your ground, but it keeps happening anyway.  

Chronic fawning could dissolve your boundaries, identity, and self-esteem over time. You may feel only as important as you can be to someone else. Or, you may find yourself caught up with emotional abusers who exploit your people-pleasing. Neither has a positive effect on your model of self.

Fawning can also disconnect you from genuinely good people who want to satisfy your needs and make you feel seen. Someone who desires a mutual friendship or romantic relationship may feel confused by a fawn’s behavior. This could then rob you of healthy relationships throughout your life. But it doesn’t need to stay that way.

Healing And Recovery

Therapy can help you process your trauma and recognize the effects of your fawning response. You may decide on rehab for trauma, outpatient treatment, or sessions with a trauma-informed therapist. Discuss your options with your doctor or therapist to find the best fit for you.

Therapies for Trauma And The Fawn Response

Your therapist may use a combination of therapies, including eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) to address your trauma. 

EMDR therapists have you briefly recall your trauma while you track an object6 (like a pen) back and forth with your eyes. Some therapists use touch. Tracking the object desensitizes you to the strong emotions brought up by retelling your trauma. This can help you process the event without such painful emotions attached to it. 

CBT works by identifying and adjusting the potentially distorted thoughts7 leading to your behaviors. Using CBT, your therapist can help you identify the thoughts and emotions causing you to fawn. Then, you’ll work on adjusting your behaviors with the truth of your thoughts revealed.

ACT helps you accept painful emotions and traumas8 as an inevitable part of life and respond with flexibility and adaptability—rather than suppression. Using ACT, your therapist can help you find more productive ways to adapt to trauma by committing to the pursuit of your values and desires. For example, you may accept your fear of saying no to someone but commit to setting the boundaries that would protect your valued energy, well-being, and time. 

In therapy, you can also learn coping strategies to recognize fawning and protect yourself from its effects. 

Coping Strategies for Fawning

First, you can learn to recognize fawning. Keep these questions in mind as you determine what is/isn’t a fawning response:

  • Did saying yes or doing what the other person wanted make you angry?
  • Did saying no feel unsafe? (If you need to talk with someone, call the domestic violence hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE, or text START to 88788.)
  • Did you feel responsible for how someone reacted to something?
  • Did you adopt or agree with the values of a friend, even though you don’t actually feel that way?
  • Did you act like you agree with someone just to get them to favor you and do what you want?

How you answer those questions can queue you into your tendency to fawn. If you recognize your behaviors as fawning, you can fill a toolbox with coping strategies on your own or with your therapist. Here’s a few examples of responses to use when you feel tempted to fawn:

  1. “No, I don’t feel comfortable doing that.”
  2. “I don’t have time to take that on for you.”
  3. “I don’t have the mental space to fix this problem for you.”
  4. “No, I can’t.”
  5. “No, I can’t do that, but here’s how I can help….”
  6. “I disagree but value your opinion.”
  7. “I’m not able to do that now.”
  8. “I want to help, but I’m not the person to help you with this.”
  9. “No, I need to put my time elsewhere.”
  10. No.

They may feel scripted at first, but keep practicing responses like these to get better at expressing your genuine desires and opinions. 

Practical Solutions for Fawning

As part of AAA (Acknowledge your feelings, Acknowledge what you want to happen next, Action), you first need to acknowledge your tendency to fawn. With the help of a therapist, you can delve into what caused this response. If it’s a way to garner acceptance from others, you may discuss why you desperately need their acceptance and how you can feel just as validated and accepted without people-pleasing. 

Then, you can take responsibility for your emotions. You can do this by journaling your emotions and how you express them in the moment. Once you take responsibility for those emotions, you can move into problem-solving. 

You and your therapist can think of practical ways to address and respond to the emotions causing you to fawn, like journaling, writing out new responses, and brainstorming what you could say/do to feel safe and validated. Together, you can also learn how to validate yourself and grow your self-acceptance without needing the approval of others.  

Supportive Resources And Communities

You can attend support groups for trauma online and in person. The c-PTSD Foundation, for example, offers online support on their website. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) has a tool for locating mental health support groups in your area. You can also search for the support groups in your area via an internet search or by contacting a mental health institute in your community. 

Or, if you want to deepen your knowledge and introspection, you can read these books about trauma and the fawning response:

You can browse Amazon, your local library, and other online bookstores for more books on trauma and the fawning response. 

Advocacy And Raising Awareness

You can advocate for yourself or someone else by learning more about the fawning response. Education can pave the way for greater understanding in both yourself and someone with limited background knowledge on trauma (and how people respond to it).

Continued awareness for fawning and other trauma responses also promotes trauma-informed care throughout different treatment settings. Your understanding of this trauma response can help others–and yourself–feel understood, valued, and validated.

What to Do if You Have Debilitating Depression: Understanding Treatment Options and Finding Support

How do you know when you need treatment for depression? We all feel sad sometimes. There’s nothing wrong with sitting with your sadness and reflecting on your feelings as you work through it. But when sadness doesn’t go away, it can hint at a more serious condition. If it begins to interfere with your life, you can even attend a rehab program for depression

Sadness vs. Depression 

There are some key differences between sadness and depression. With either, you may feel tired or lost. When you have depression, those feelings persist for longer periods of time, accompanied by a sense of hopelessness or worthlessness. You might even feel numb. Everyday activities you once enjoyed can start to feel like chores. 

Severe depression1 can also take a toll on your physical health, causing restlessness, changes in appetite, and physical aches and pains. And depression often co-occurs with addiction.2 If you have either or both of these conditions, you can choose between several different treatment options.

Available Treatment Options for Severe Depression

When you’re dealing with debilitating depression, it can feel like there’s no way out. But with treatment that aligns with your values, you can build a life you love. The key is to make sure your unique recovery goals are at the forefront of any care plan. To accommodate each patient’s needs, most rehabs offer a combination of treatment approaches.3

Medication

Medication can be vital in reducing depressive symptoms. Mood stabilizers, antidepressants, or antipsychotic medication can help you regulate your brain chemistry. It’s normal to go through trial and error with antidepressant medications. Most people try different types and doses to find the best fit for them.

Psychotherapy

Having a therapist to confide in and talk through your feelings can help you heal from depression. Therapies like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), interpersonal therapy (IPT), and family-focused therapy help you address any underlying issues contributing to depression. You—and sometimes your loved ones—will also develop new coping skills to help you move forward.

Inpatient Rehab

If you have severe depression, you can start recovery in an inpatient rehab. These centers offer a safe space to heal without the distractions and stressors of your typical environment. You can choose between a wide variety of programs, including trauma-informed care, rehabs that treat co-occurring disorders, and more.

Outpatient Treatment

With outpatient treatment programs, you can receive similar care to inpatient programs while living at home. Like most other approaches, outpatient treatment is tailored to your specific needs. Intensive outpatient programs (IOPs) let you attend treatment part time, while you continue to work, go to school, or spend time with friends. Partial hospitalization programs (PHPs) offer a higher level of care, but still give you some free time outside of therapy.

Alternative Therapies

If you attend a holistic rehab, you can participate in alternative therapies for depression. These treatments look a little different in every program. For example, you might connect with horses during equine therapy or practice mindfulness in a yoga class. These activities can be hugely beneficial, but they’re no substitute for more traditional treatments. A comprehensive care plan for severe depression could include these options as supplemental therapies.

Finding Support and Coping With Depression

When you’re recovering from depression, building a solid support system is essential. The details of that support system are different for everyone. Anything that keeps you engaged can help you work through difficult symptoms, reminding you that even strong feelings are temporary.

Spending time with family and loved ones you trust can help you feel supported. Opening up to a therapist might give you insight into your feelings. You can also join a depression support group to connect with people going through similar experiences. The opportunities are endless. But data shows that a few specific activities can be especially helpful.

Exercise 

Exercise has many powerful physical and emotional benefits. First and foremost, practicing physical self care is a meaningful way to cope with feelings of depression. Instead of working out so you can look a certain way, the activity itself can be your primary goal.

Exercise is shown to reduce depressive symptoms.4 When it’s hard to get out of bed, the last thing you might want to do is go for a run. But starting small, even for 10 minutes, helps you slowly build endurance and get stronger every day.

Changing Your Diet

Have you ever heard of the link between food and mood?5 Depression can make you skip meals, crave sweets, and indulge in junk food. Foods like refined sugars, processed foods, and fried foods can make depression worse. Adopting a balanced diet can help positively transform depressive symptoms.6

Eating whole foods that nurture your body can improve your mood along with your physical health. Complex carbs, protein, omega-3 fatty acids, and antioxidants are just a few vital nutrients that can help fight depression.

Getting Enough Sleep

Depressive symptoms can intensify when you don’t get enough sleep. Ironically, depression can trigger sleep problems7 like insomnia, making it hard to fall asleep or stay asleep. It can be frustrating to navigate this situation. But making your best effort to improve your sleeping habits is a start. 

You can consistently prioritize sleep with small habits like getting in bed earlier, removing distractions like TV or phones at night, and creating a comfortable sleep environment. These small changes can have a huge impact on the quality of your sleep. You can also ask your doctor or therapist for more specific advice, with your exact symptoms and health history in mind.

Mindfulness Activities

Depression often brings up a lot of dark thoughts. You can take a step back and reflect on your feelings by making time for mindfulness activities like meditation. Mindfulness helps you acknowledge those thoughts without blaming yourself. The act of noticing a thought, accepting it, and then letting it go can empower you to break out of negative cycles.

Creativity 

Many people use creativity as a form of therapy. Spending time on creative outlets like art, music, or web design helps you shift your focus as well. Putting your energy into something positive can help you grow and feel better.

For example, studies suggest journaling is good for mental health8 because it can help you get your thoughts out and clear your mind. Even if your writing is all negative or doesn’t make sense, putting it on the page can make you feel lighter.

Journaling can also help you make sense of your own thoughts and feelings. When you start to notice emotional patterns, you might discover ways to work through them. You’ll also have a written record of your progress, which might help you stay on track when you encounter future challenges. 

The Road to Recovery

The journey to recovery isn’t always straightforward. But with the right support, you can find the best way to improve. For many people, professional treatment is essential. With your care team’s help, you can learn the skills you need to get and stay well.

Healing from depression looks a little different for everyone. You might benefit from any combination of medication, therapy, or alternative treatments. Talk to your provider about which options might best suit your needs, and don’t be afraid to experiment. It can take time to find the most effective approach.

With an effective depression care plan, you can rediscover the things you love most. For example, if you’re a nature lover, your plan might incorporate hiking or time at the beach. Beyond being fun, data shows that spending time outdoors improves mental health.9

Stick to your treatment plan as best as you can. If it feels like it’s not working, get support from your care team. They may suggest changes, or they may encourage you to be patient as treatment takes effect. Healing can be a slow process, and you may experience setbacks. Recovery doesn’t mean that you’ll never feel depressed again. Instead, it means you’ll have the tools to live a rich, meaningful life, even when you’re experiencing mental health symptoms.

Planning Your Journey

As you start to plan your recovery from depression, you can choose from many treatment options. Make sure to put yourself first, and find the type of care that best meets your unique needs. When you’re on the right path, you can take things by day. Small changes in diet, exercise, and other routines can make a huge difference over time. 

Getting professional help for severe depression is a vital part of recovery. When you take this step, you regain power over your own life. Check out our list of depression rehab centers to start your recovery journey. 


Frequently Asked Questions About Severe Depression

What’s the difference between sadness and depression?

Sadness and depression share similar symptoms, but depression is characterized by persistent feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness that interfere with daily life. Depression can also cause physical symptoms such as changes in appetite, physical aches and pains, and restlessness.

What are the available treatment options for severe depression?

Treatment options for severe depression include medication, psychotherapy, inpatient rehab, outpatient treatment, and alternative therapies. These options can be tailored to your specific needs and often include a combination of approaches.

What are some ways to find support and cope with depression?

Building a solid support system is essential when recovering from depression. This can include spending time with family and loved ones, opening up to a therapist, joining a depression support group, exercising, changing your diet, getting enough sleep, and practicing mindfulness meditation. These activities help improve mood and overall well-being.