This article summarizes a heartfelt conversation from the Giving Voice to Depression podcast, hosted by Terry McGuire. In Episode 357, “The Power of Yet: Reclaiming Hope,” Terry and co-host Dr. Anita Sanz revisit Lori’s deeply personal journey through persistent depression. With remarkable honesty, Lori shares the painful truths, small victories, and gentle shifts that helped her reclaim a sense of hope after nearly a decade of feeling stuck.

This article isn’t about “quick fixes” or magic solutions. It’s about the power of small steps, the importance of connection, and the courage it takes to remain open to the possibility of change—even when hope feels out of reach. Whether you are navigating depression yourself or walking alongside someone who is, these insights offer gentle reminders that healing is possible—even if you haven’t found the right path yet.

1. Understand That You Are Not Broken, You Are Stuck

The most profound realization Lori took away from her treatment experience was one that challenged the very foundation of how she saw herself:

Lori: You don’t need to be fixed because you’re not broken. You’re just stuck.

Those words softened years of self-blame. Because broken feels permanent. It suggests damage that cannot be undone. But stuck? Stuck means there’s still a way forward. Maybe not easily, maybe not quickly—but forward nonetheless.

Why this matters:

• Stuck means temporary. Broken feels hopeless.
• Stuck suggests there is a way through. Broken suggests there is not.
• Stuck invites compassion. Broken fuels shame.

If you are struggling, please hear this: You are not broken. You are not beyond help. You are stuck—and stuck is something that can change.

2. Know That You Are Not Alone

For so many people living with chronic depression, one of the heaviest burdens is the belief that they are the only one who feels this way. Lori expressed this beautifully when she said:

Lori: I didn’t know anybody at all like me that just lived with that all-the-time depression.

That sense of isolation can deepen despair and reinforce the lie that something is uniquely wrong with you. But Lori’s experience at the treatment center introduced her to others who shared similar struggles. It was life-changing.

Lori: It maybe just took a little bit of the burden off of me just thinking that it was just me.

Ways to remind yourself you’re not alone:

• Join a peer support group
• Listen to stories like Lori’s and others on Giving Voice to Depression
• Seek community through online mental health forums

Connection breaks isolation. It chips away at the lie that you are the only one.

3. Make Small, Consistent Shifts

One of the most powerful lessons Lori learned was the importance of small, manageable changes—what she calls “tiny shifts.”

Lori: They said, what if you’re willing to shift your thinking like one degree? Not 180 degrees—one degree.

It can be tempting to believe that healing requires radical transformation. But often, it’s the small, consistent adjustments that move us toward a better place.

Think of an airplane changing course by just one degree. Over time, that tiny shift leads to an entirely different destination. It’s the same with depression recovery.

Gentle suggestions:

• Try one new coping tool
• Adjust your inner self-talk by just one phrase
• Commit to one small act of self-care each day

You don’t have to overhaul your life. You just have to be willing to try something different—even one degree different.

4. Embrace the Power of “Yet”

Throughout the episode, Terry and Dr. Anita reflect on the significance of one small word: yet. It’s a word that keeps the door to possibility cracked open, even when hope feels impossible.

Instead of saying:

• “I’m not better.”

Try saying:

• “I’m not better yet.”
• “I haven’t found what helps yet.”

“Yet” acknowledges the reality of where you are without closing the door on where you could go. It’s an invitation to remain open to the possibility of change—even if that change hasn’t arrived today.

5. Recognize Depression’s Lies

Depression is more than sadness. It’s a master manipulator—a voice that whispers cruel, believable lies about your worth and your future.

Lori: I always wanted somebody to fix me. I’m like, why can’t somebody fix me? Why can’t meds fix me, why can’t a counselor? Why can’t I be fixed? And they said, you don’t need to be fixed because you’re not broken. You’re just stuck.

Depression lies when it tells you:

• “You are worthless.”
• “You will always feel this way.”
• “Nothing will ever help.”

As Terry gently reminds listeners:

Terry: Of course, every message you’re getting is ‘Nothing will change and you’re not worth it,’ but that’s the lie.

To counter these lies:

• Speak your truth out loud
• Challenge the negative thoughts, even when they feel convincing
• Surround yourself with people who remind you of your value

6. Honor Your Past Without Letting It Define You

Lori shared how easy it was to live in the story of her past—believing that the failures and pain behind her were proof that nothing could change.

But one small shift in thinking changed everything:

Lori: Your past is very important… but now what? How do you get through the rest of your life?

Acknowledging where you’ve been is vital. But staying stuck there keeps you from moving forward. Healing invites us to carry the lessons, not the weight.

Ways to let go of the past’s grip:

• Mindfulness practices that anchor you in the present
• Forgiveness work (especially self-forgiveness)
• Compassionate self-reflection instead of harsh judgment

7. Lighten Your Load: From Backpack Person to Screen Door Person

One of the most memorable metaphors Lori shares is the idea of being a “backpack person” versus a “screen door person.”

Lori: I was a huge backpack person. Everything that happened to me—and to others—I put it in my backpack and carried it. It just got so heavy.

When we carry every hurt, every disappointment, and every responsibility like stones in a backpack, the load becomes unbearable. Lori learned to let go of that weight, choosing instead to let life’s experiences “blow through” like air through a screen door:

Lori: I don’t need to cling to it. I don’t need to judge it. I don’t need to carry it.

Visualize this:

• Notice what you’re packing into your backpack
• Ask yourself what you can let go of today
• Picture yourself as a screen door—allowing life to flow through without trapping it inside

8. Redefine Your Worth: You Don’t Have to Earn It

A major shift for Lori came when she realized how much of her pain was tied to contingent self-worth—the belief that her value had to be earned through success, perfection, or selflessness.

But in treatment, she heard a truth that helped her begin to break free from that cycle:

Lori: My worth is a set point. It’s not changeable.

Your worth is not up for debate. It is not based on your productivity, your weight, your income, or how many people you please. It is inherent. It is constant. It is yours.

Daily reminders:

• “I am worthy as I am.”
• “My worth does not fluctuate.”
• “I do not have to earn the right to take up space.”

9. Stay Open-Minded About What Might Help

Lori’s healing journey didn’t look like what she expected. In fact, some of the tools that made a difference were things she might have dismissed before.

As Terry observed:

Terry: There may be gourd painting, and it’d be real easy to be like, ‘Oh, hell no.’ But the act of doing that shifted something.

The truth is, we never know what might open a door, spark a shift, or offer relief. Sometimes, what seems silly or “not for me” turns out to be the thing that helps the most.

Stay open to:

• Creative outlets
• Mindfulness exercises
• Group experiences you’ve never tried before

Remember Anita’s words of wisdom: “Never say never.”

10. Trust That Slow Progress Is Still Progress

Healing is not linear. There are no straight lines in this journey, and there is no timeline you “should” be on.

Lori: It took a lot of years—my whole lifetime—to get to where I was. I can’t just spin on a dime and everything’s different now.

But even with that reality, Lori noticed something beautiful: the dread that once met her every morning had begun to soften.

Lori: I don’t go to bed at night fearing having to wake up the next morning. I don’t wake up feeling severely disappointed because I wish I hadn’t. I’m slowly doing better, and I’m not in any rush to get better or be happy—but I’m noticing more contentment in my days. And that’s enough for now.

Let this be your encouragement:

• Slow is okay
• Small is meaningful
• “Enough for now” is still enough

Final Thoughts: You Are Worthy of Hope and Healing

Lori’s story is a powerful reminder that even when depression feels like it has stripped away every ounce of hope, there are still paths forward—even if they are small, even if they are slow, even if you haven’t found them yet.

Terry: Depression is too dark a road to walk alone.

Please remember: you are not alone. You are not broken. You are worthy of support, compassion, and hope.

Healing may not happen overnight. But with each small step, each gentle shift, and each courageous act of staying open to the possibility of something new, you are moving forward.

And sometimes, that’s the bravest thing we can do.

This article summarizes a deeply personal conversation featured on the Giving Voice to Depression podcast, hosted by Terry McGuire. In each episode, Terry speaks with someone who has lived experience of depression or a mental health professional working in the field. In Episode 356: “Living at 60%: A Raw Look at Persistent Depression” guest Lori shares her story of living with persistent depressive disorder (PDD), offering honest insight into what it’s like to survive—not thrive—on a daily basis.

Unlike the more episodic nature of major depressive disorder, PDD is a chronic, long-lasting form of depression, often described as living life through a heavy, emotional fog. Lori’s reflections are raw and real, shedding light on the misunderstood experience of “high-functioning” depression. Below are the key takeaways and hard truths Lori reveals about this condition.

1. Persistent Depression Is Not Just “Sadness” That Won’t Go Away

PDD isn’t about feeling low occasionally—it’s about feeling low always. Lori has lived in a nearly constant state of depression for nine years, with the occasional major depressive episode layered on top. This overlapping experience is sometimes called “double depression.”

“I’m not, you know, laid out flat where I just can’t function. But it feels like that’s kind of where I stopped, but I’ve never truly regained the emotional feelings of what it feels like to be out in the sunshine like normal.” – Lori

2. People With PDD Can Still Function—But It Comes at a High Cost

Lori explains she operates at about 60% of her capacity most days. To outsiders, she may appear functional, but internally, every task requires immense effort.

• She finds herself completely drained, whether or not she worked that day.
• Even pleasant activities are exhausting.
• Smiling or participating in joyful moments feels performative, not genuine.

“I can do things…but it’s still really hard and I just have to push myself to keep going because I have to. I mean, I don’t have a choice.” – Lori

3. Starting at 60% Means You’re Already Close to the Bottom

Living at 60% makes you more vulnerable to the lows. A minor setback can plunge someone dangerously close to the pit of depression. This constant proximity to the edge is one of the most harrowing realities of PDD.

“It’s scary because you’re closer to the bottom… So just maybe sometimes even a little swing can make a dramatic difference in how much I’m able to function because it’s like starting out underwater.” – Lori

4. Joy Feels Muffled—Like You’re Underwater

In one of the most powerful metaphors of the episode, Lori likens her experience of depression to listening to music underwater. You know the song is beautiful, but you can’t really hear it.

“So like, say I’m doing something with my kids … I can know that I should be feeling joyful about it, like this is a joyous occasion. I know what it should be. I just can’t get there” – Lori

5. Morning Is the Hardest Part of the Day

For Lori, every morning begins with despair. It’s not about needing more sleep. It’s about not having the will to face another day of heavy emotional labor.

“Every single morning I wake up and I’m really disappointed that I woke up again… it feels like I have a beanbag chair full of lead on top of me. It’s like, I’m awake and I can’t … I can’t do anything.” – Lori

6. Passive Suicidal Ideation Is Real and Misunderstood

Lori’s experience includes passive suicidal ideation—not active planning, but a consistent, draining wish to “just not wake up.” This type of ideation is often overlooked or minimized.

• It’s not a desire to die.
• It’s a desire for the pain to stop.
• It’s a yearning for rest from a relentless internal struggle.

7. Depression Isn’t Always Visible—Or Obvious

Lori’s story reinforces how well people with chronic depression can mask their struggles. To outsiders, they may appear fine—cheerful, even productive. But appearances can be deceiving.

“You fake it well enough that someone who doesn’t know you wouldn’t know.” – Terry McGuire, describing the hard-to-see nature of Lori’s depression

8. Well-Meaning Advice Can Do More Harm Than Good

Friends and loved ones often try to help, but the impulse to fix or minimize the issue often backfires. Common phrases like:

• “Still?! I thought you were better.”
• “Well, you look fine.”
• “Maybe try adjusting your meds again.”

…can feel dismissive, invalidating the chronic nature of the illness.

“So to try to fix things is just really, really hard to have people suggest … If there was anything, anything that I could do, you know I would do it.” – Lori

9. Support Is About Validation, Not Fixing

The best support isn’t about solutions—it’s about acknowledging the struggle. Lori stresses how powerful it is when someone simply recognizes her effort to stay afloat.

• Say: “That sounds so hard. Props to you for showing up anyway.”
• Avoid: “Have you tried XYZ?”

10. Hope Can Feel Impossible—But Curiosity Might Be Enough

Telling someone with chronic depression to “stay hopeful” can feel cruel. But offering them the idea of staying curious can be more accessible and effective.

“Years ago a guest said, you don’t have to be hopeful about your future, but try to be at least a little curious—and that can be enough.” – Terry McGuire

11. Persistent Depression Deserves Its Own Diagnosis and Compassion

Dr. Anita Sanz, the podcast’s former co-host and a psychologist, emphasizes that persistent depressive disorder is not a failure of treatment or effort. It’s a legitimate, chronic mental illness that demands acknowledgment and compassion.

• It’s not caused by a failure to try hard enough.
• It’s not due to ineffective therapy or medication alone.
• It’s its own category, deserving of understanding and patience.

“It is not milder in the sense of the impact on the person… because it can just literally feel like you’re being worn down.” – Dr. Anita Sanz

12. Even Enjoyable Activities Can Be Exhausting

Socializing, hobbies, or special occasions may seem like a break from depression—but for someone with PDD, even positive interactions can feel like another task.

• Lori often agrees to activities for her own good.
• But when the time comes, she regrets committing.
• The guilt and self-judgment compound the emotional load.

13. Change Is Possible—But It May Be Subtle

While Lori’s condition didn’t disappear, she did attend a treatment program that made a noticeable shift. She now no longer dreads waking up, even if mornings are still difficult.

• The change was subtle—but significant.
• It proves that things can shift, even if healing doesn’t look like a complete recovery.

“[Lori] will tell us she no longer goes to bed dreading waking. And when she wakes, while it’s still difficult physically and mentally to get up and get the day started, it’s not because she wishes she hadn’t waken. [Her treatment] did effect a shift.” – Terry

+1: Just Stay—Even If It’s Just One Day at a Time

A central takeaway from Lori’s story and Terry and Anita’s reflections is that sometimes staying alive and continuing to show up is the hardest and most courageous thing a person can do. It might not get better right away—but staying alive means you’re here if it does.

• Focus on just getting through today.
• Be kind to yourself in the hardest moments.
• Understand that managing chronic depression is a full-time job.

“The most important thing is to stay so that you’re here to see the shift. And that’s what we always come back to is, please stay, that’s the most important thing. And then the next most important thing is, let’s not make staying be so miserable because that’s not okay either. I don’t want you to stay and be miserable. I want you stay and have life be actually something worth feeling like it’s worth living. And so then we go from there.” – Dr. Sanz

Final Thoughts

Living with persistent depressive disorder (PDD) isn’t about surviving a rough patch—it’s about enduring a constant emotional weight that never fully lifts. As Lori shares in her courageous and unfiltered interview, the experience isn’t defined by dramatic breakdowns or total dysfunction, but rather by the exhausting, relentless effort it takes to maintain a semblance of normalcy while feeling internally disconnected from joy, motivation, and hope.

This kind of depression can be deeply isolating. When the world expects smiles, productivity, and gratitude, living at 60% feels like you’re failing to meet invisible standards—standards that don’t apply to a chronic mental health condition. Lori’s honesty gives voice to an experience that many silently endure: waking up disappointed to still be here, pushing through the day without access to joy, and feeling invisible because you “look fine.”

But her story also reminds us that even subtle shifts—like no longer dreading the morning—are worth acknowledging and celebrating. While recovery might not mean a return to 100%, it can mean finding better tools, support, and moments of relief.

The most important takeaway? We need to believe people when they say they’re struggling, and support them in ways that emphasize presence, compassion, and endurance—not quick fixes or false optimism.

This in-depth exploration is inspired by the Giving Voice to Depression podcast, hosted by Terry McGuire. The podcast serves as a platform to foster open conversations about mental health, recognizing the importance of addressing conditions like depression with clarity and empathy. In this episode, a critical yet often misunderstood topic takes center stage: the distinction between sadness and clinical depression.

The ability to differentiate between these two states is paramount. Misunderstanding can lead to the dismissal of a serious mental health condition, preventing individuals from seeking the help they need. Conversely, it can also result in unnecessary alarm and overreaction to transient emotional experiences that are a normal part of life. 

To navigate this complex terrain, the podcast features insights from respected experts in the field: Dr. Robert Duff, Dr. Margaret Rutherford, and Dr. Maduka Trivedi, each offering valuable perspectives rooted in their clinical experience and research.

1. Defining Depression: Beyond the Common Usage

Dr. Robert Duff, a psychologist, begins by dissecting the common understanding of “depression.” In everyday language, the term is frequently used to describe a temporary state of feeling down, discouraged, or simply “blue.” These feelings are a natural part of the human experience and can be triggered by various life events, from minor disappointments to significant losses. However, Dr. Duff emphasizes the crucial distinction between this transient sadness and clinical depression.  

Clinical depression, he explains, is characterized by a persistent pattern of these negative feelings. It’s not just a fleeting moment of sadness but a prolonged state that can encompass a range of emotional, physical, and cognitive symptoms. These symptoms can include persistent sadness, loss of interest or pleasure in activities, changes in appetite or sleep, fatigue, feelings of worthlessness, difficulty concentrating, and even thoughts of death or suicide. The key differentiator lies in the duration, intensity, and pervasive nature of these symptoms, and the degree to which they significantly interfere with an individual’s daily life and overall functioning.  

“You can feel depressed without being depressed, right?

Without being clinically depressed.

Depression is a feeling that everybody has of being sad, of feeling like the wind’s taken out of your sails, maybe being lethargic, things like that.

But with clinical depression, it’s a pattern of those feelings.”  

2. Depression as a Real and Tangible Illness

One of the most important messages conveyed in the podcast is that clinical depression is a real and diagnosable mental illness. It’s not simply a matter of lacking willpower, being overly sensitive, or failing to “snap out of it.” Dr. Duff firmly states that there are actual physiological differences in the brain of a person experiencing depression.  

Research has shown that depression is associated with changes in neurotransmitter activity, brain structure, and hormonal function. These biological factors contribute to the symptoms of depression and explain why treatments such as medication and psychotherapy can be effective. The podcast emphasizes that recognizing depression as a legitimate illness is crucial for reducing stigma and encouraging individuals to seek help without shame or self-blame.  

3. The Insidious Nature of Depression: A Parasitic Force

Dr. Duff offers a powerful analogy to illustrate the insidious nature of depression, comparing it to a parasite. He explains that depression has a way of draining an individual’s energy, perpetuating a cycle of guilt and negativity, and distorting their self-perception.  

Depression often leads to lethargy and a lack of motivation, making it difficult to engage in activities that typically bring joy or a sense of accomplishment. This inactivity can then lead to feelings of guilt and worthlessness, further deepening the depression. Moreover, depression can warp a person’s thoughts, causing them to develop negative beliefs about themselves, their abilities, and their future. This “cognitive distortion” is a hallmark of depression, and it can be incredibly challenging to overcome without intervention.  

“I like to think of depression kind of as a parasite because it does all of the things to you that it needs to keep itself strong.

It saps your energy, so it makes you feel more lethargic, which makes you not do things, which makes you feel more guilty, which make you feel more depressed, and so it goes in a cycle and it builds itself up and up.”  

4. Triggers and Duration: Key Distinguishing Factors

Dr. Margaret Rutherford, another experienced psychologist, highlights the importance of considering triggers and duration when differentiating between sadness and depression.  

Sadness is often a direct response to a specific event or situation. It might be triggered by a disappointment, a loss, a conflict, or a challenging life transition. While sadness can be intense and painful, it tends to be time-limited. The intensity of the emotion gradually subsides, and the individual is able to return to their normal level of functioning.  

In contrast, depression can sometimes arise without an identifiable external trigger. While it can certainly be precipitated by a traumatic event or significant loss, it can also develop gradually or seemingly out of the blue. Furthermore, depression is characterized by its persistence. The feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and despair linger for weeks, months, or even years, significantly impacting the individual’s ability to function in daily life.  

5. The All-Encompassing Impact of Depression

Depression is not confined to just one aspect of an individual’s experience; it can be all-encompassing, affecting their emotional state, physical health, thoughts, and behaviors.  

Bridget, the podcast’s co-host, uses the word “consumed” to describe the feeling of being overwhelmed by depression. Dr. Rutherford adds that it can feel as though one “forget[s] how to be happy.” This highlights a crucial aspect of depression: it can significantly impair an individual’s capacity to experience positive emotions. It’s not that the desire for happiness is absent, but rather that the brain’s ability to process and generate those feelings is compromised.  

6. Depression Is Not a Choice: Dispelling Misconceptions

A common misconception about depression is that it’s a matter of choice, that individuals could simply “choose” to be happier if they wanted to. The podcast strongly refutes this notion.  

Dr. Rutherford emphasizes that people with depression are not “whiners” or simply feeling sorry for themselves. Depression is a distinct “state of mind” characterized by changes in brain function that affect mood regulation, motivation, and cognitive processes. The inability to experience joy or find pleasure in activities is a core symptom of depression, and it’s not something that can be overcome through sheer willpower.  

“People with depression are not whiners.

They’re not just feeling sorry for themselves. It is a state of mind.

It’s as if you can’t focus on whatever you had in your life that you enjoyed, you no longer enjoy it, and that’s not a choice.

That’s the reality of how you feel.”  

7. The Role of Genetics in Depression

The podcast also touches on the role of genetics in depression. Dr. Rutherford explains that there is often a “genetic predisposition” for depression.  

Just as individuals can inherit a predisposition for other medical conditions, such as diabetes or cancer, they can also inherit a vulnerability to depression. This means that if a person has a family history of depression, they may be at an increased risk of developing the illness themselves. It’s important to note that having a genetic predisposition does not guarantee that someone will develop depression, but it can make them more susceptible.  

8. Depression as a Cloud: A Distorted Perspective

Dr. Maduka Trivedi, head of the Center for Depression Research and Clinical Care at UT Southwestern Medical Center, offers a powerful metaphor to describe the impact of depression on an individual’s perception. He likens depression to a “cloud hanging over your head.”  

This cloud distorts thoughts, feelings, and experiences, casting a negative filter over everything. Even in the presence of positive events or experiences, the cloud of depression can make it difficult to feel joy or find relief from negative thoughts. Dr. Trivedi contrasts this with normal sadness, where positive events can provide temporary respite from negative feelings. In depression, however, the negative thoughts and feelings are pervasive and unrelenting.  

“So I think in general the way I explain to lay people is the following: all of us can have ups and downs in life and when you have a down period you do feel down but there are two easy signals that we tell you.

One is even when you are feeling down if there is some positive thing happening in your life or some positive event occurring or somebody … a loved one calls you, you temporarily or even sometimes immediately get out of that funk and start sort of communicating like you were before.

If you have a small-d depression … a sort of bad day.

If you have Depression it is very hard to do that because your ruminative negative thoughts just overtake no matter what the environment is.”  

9. The Importance of Acknowledging Depression as a Real Illness

Dr. Trivedi emphasizes the critical importance of acknowledging depression as a real illness. He stresses that it is a “brain disease” with distinct and identifiable signs and symptoms.  

Dismissing depression as “just feeling sad” or telling people to “get over it” is not only insensitive but also harmful. It invalidates the individual’s experience and discourages them from seeking the help they need. Dr. Trivedi asserts that depression is not a “weakness” or a character flaw. It is a medical condition that requires understanding, compassion, and appropriate treatment.  

10. Key Symptoms of Depression: A Comprehensive Overview

The podcast references a list of key symptoms of depression, drawing from resources like WebMD. These symptoms provide a more detailed understanding of the multifaceted nature of depression:  

• Depressed mood: This involves persistent feelings of sadness, emptiness, or hopelessness. It’s more than just a passing feeling of sadness; it’s a pervasive and enduring state.  
• Loss of interest or pleasure: One of the hallmark symptoms of depression is a significant decrease in interest or pleasure in activities that were once enjoyable. This can affect hobbies, social activities, work, and even relationships.  
• Significant weight changes: Depression can lead to changes in appetite, resulting in significant weight loss when not dieting or significant weight gain.  
• Sleep disturbances: Depression can disrupt sleep patterns, causing insomnia (difficulty sleeping) or hypersomnia (excessive sleeping).  
• Restlessness or slowed movements: Some individuals with depression experience psychomotor agitation, characterized by restlessness or irritability. Others may experience psychomotor retardation, a slowing down of physical movements and speech.  
• Fatigue or loss of energy: Persistent fatigue and a lack of energy are common symptoms of depression.

In conclusion, this exploration, deeply rooted in the insights of the Giving Voice to Depression podcast, underscores the vital importance of distinguishing between transient sadness and the pervasive condition of clinical depression. Depression is not simply an amplified version of sadness but a distinct and serious illness that can profoundly impact every facet of an individual’s life. 

By recognizing the key differences in triggers, duration, intensity, and the presence of accompanying symptoms, we can move towards a greater understanding of mental health and foster a more supportive environment for those who are struggling. If you or someone you know is experiencing symptoms of depression, seeking professional help is a critical step towards recovery and well-being.