Tag: Family Involvement

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What Happens in Family Therapy?

Family therapy for addiction or mental health conditions may come as an unexpected aspect of treatment. If you’re not the one getting treatment, why are you getting involved? Many families initially wonder the same thing.

Many family members also want to, and would, do anything to help their loved one get better. If that means going to family therapy, they’ll do it in a heartbeat, even if it’s unexpected. Others may feel more skeptical and resistant, depending on the nature of their family dynamics and their mental health literacy. 

However, each group will likely have the same question: what’s family therapy like? What happens? 

We’ll help you learn more about it and what to expect in this article. You can also explore more about family therapy and group work by listening to our recent podcast episode with Dr. Claudia Black.

What Is Family Therapy?

Some family members first assume family therapy means hearing everything they did wrong and getting blamed for their loved ones predicament. That’s false. If behaviors from family did contribute to the patient’s condition, that will likely come up, but in a respectful, compassionate way. Family therapy isn’t a trick for the patient and their therapist to gang up on family members—it’s meant to restore loving relationships and heal their family dynamics.

The therapist, psychologist, or counselor who leads family therapy strives to help both the patient and their loved one verbalize and work through problems with respect and love, not judgment or blame. Through open communication, patients and their families can resolve issues, forgive, and learn how to modify potentially harmful behaviors. 

Many treatment centers strongly suggest and offer family therapy as part of their core treatment. That’s because family therapy has the power to heal relationships, improve the support system of the person in treatment, and give the whole family unit hope in recovery. You can also attend family therapy as a stand-alone service, without your loved one being in a residential or outpatient program.

Goals and Reasons for Family Therapy

The ultimate goal of family therapy is to help the person in treatment get better. Since family is often an extension of ourselves, their involvement in this healing is often crucial. 

And, after patients leave treatment, the closest and most impactful support system they return to is often their family. Discussing concerns, past issues, and resolving conflict in family therapy can create a stronger support system for when they get back. 

Another crucial reason for family therapy is to give loved ones the chance to heal. They often have their own recovery journeys to walk, even if they weren’t the one struggling with an addiction or a mental health concern. For example, some family members fall into codependency as a way to have some grasp at control over their loved one’s condition. Family therapy can help you recognize your own recovery needs and process the experience of your loved one’s condition without guilt, anger, or self-responsibility.

What Family Therapy Looks Like: First and Continuing Sessions

Family therapy typically begins once your loved one has stabilized, expressed approval for family therapy, and has shown initial progress in their treatment. This means your sessions could start anywhere from a couple weeks to 1+ months after they admit into treatment. It’ll depend on their preferences and progress. Once they’re ready and their treatment team determines it beneficial, you’ll come in for your first session.

Before that, you’ll likely meet with the family therapist to go over expectations, ask questions, and become more comfortable in the space. This might happen as soon as your loved one admits into treatment or just before your first official session.  

First Session

Your very first family therapy session will likely include these key parts:

  1. Setting expectations together.
  2. Agreeing (and even signing a written contract) on how you will conduct yourself and treat others in your session. For example, you may all sign a contract promising to listen without interrupting or to not raise your voices.
  3. Outlining what your goals are for family therapy and how the therapist will know if they’re being met.
  4. Defining a direction and plan for your future sessions.
  5. If time allows, diving into how everyone’s feeling and any conversations they’d like to have now, or something they’d like to understand about their loved one in treatment.

You’ll likely sit in a small, private room—probably the therapist’s office, or the designated family therapy room if the treatment center has one. Your sessions will stay confidential and what’s shared won’t leave the room. Before you leave, your therapist may check in with how you’re all feeling and how you think the session went.

Continuing Sessions

Treatment centers vary in how often they provide family therapy. Some will schedule it once a week or once every couple weeks; others will designate 3-5 consecutive days for loved ones to engage in education and family therapy. This format is called a family week, or family program. Family programs often split their focus between 1) education and multi-family support groups and 2) family therapy with the patient and their loved ones. 

If your loved one isn’t participating in a residential or outpatient treatment program and instead attending family therapy as a stand-alone treatment, your sessions may be more regular and adaptable to your schedules. For example, you could request weekly or bi-weekly appointments. 

In continuing sessions, you’ll build off the goals and outlines set in your first session. They may also flow more organically, addressing issues as they arise or as they come to mind. For example, you may talk about something that happened recently or, during your session, your discussions may remind you of a past event you want to go over.

You’ll check in continuously with others and the therapist to ensure you’re meeting the goals set in the beginning, and that you’re finding the therapy beneficial. If you have changes or suggestions in mind, you may discuss these at the very beginning or end of the session.

Who Can Go to Family Therapy?

You don’t need to share DNA to go to family therapy. Chosen family can come too—anyone who supports the patient and that they trust. When asking the patient about family therapy, the therapist will see who they’d like included or excluded. Here are just some of the people that can come to family therapy:

  • Parents
  • Siblings
  • Friends
  • Cousins
  • Step-siblings
  • Step-parents
  • Coworkers
  • Children
  • Foster parents
  • Foster children
  • Grandparents
  • Grandchildren
  • Honorary and/or chosen family members

Is Family Therapy Required?

No. The patient may not want to engage in family therapy, or family members may not want to participate. No one is forced to, though family therapy is often strongly recommended.

For example, patients who were abused and traumatized by their families would not find it appropriate to bring their family members into treatment. Their treatment providers would agree. In these cases, and any other time the patient doesn’t want their family involved, family therapy will not be required or pursued.

Family Therapy vs. Family Education

Therapy and education for families aren’t the same things. They may overlap in some ways, but they have different goals and purposes. 

Family Therapy

Family therapy aims to heal relationships and reconnect loved ones, strengthening their bond and support system. They learn how to communicate better and process disagreements with respect and love. 

Family Education

Family education focuses on teaching loved ones about addiction and mental health conditions. It covers how conditions develop, contributing factors, and the recovery process. Families learn the biological background of addiction and mental health conditions, helping them see behavioral health conditions don’t arise from a lack of willpower. 

If a treatment center offers a family program, they may include workshops and presentations from a variety of professionals or those with lived experience. These sessions are often more interactive between the educator and other family members. 

Family therapy will likely touch on these aspects as questions arise or to explain behaviors of the patient. But the main focus of family therapy isn’t education.

Resources for Family Healing and Education

Family members have many resources and support available, whether their loved one is in treatment or not. 

Online Resources and Groups

Here’s a few online resources to access support:

Call Lines

And here are some numbers you can call for support or crisis care:

Books

These books offer education and support for family members of someone with behavioral health concerns:

  • Undaunted Hope by Dr. Claudia Black, “Stories of Healing from Trauma, Depression, and Addictions”
  • Unspoken Legacy by Dr. Claudia Black, “A far-ranging examination of how the effects of addiction and trauma in the family can reverberate for generations”
  • Codependent No More by Melody Beattie, “How To Stop Controlling Others And Start Caring For Yourself”
  • Addict in The Family by Beverly Conyers, “Rather than providing simple solutions or definitive answers to every question, Conyers’ careful research and warm writing offer education and support from those who “have been where you are” and the healing, isolation-breaking power of shared experiences.”

Family members can also attend individual therapy to discuss their experiences, process trauma, and develop coping skills in a 1-1 setting. These private sessions offer greater personalization and may be helpful for family members who don’t feel comfortable sharing in a family setting.

Ultimately, family therapy in rehab benefits both the person in treatment and the ones who love them. It’s often a critical aspect of recovery, and one you can support simply by attending and participating in sessions. 
To learn more about family therapy and its importance in recovery, you can listen to our recent podcast episode with expert Dr. Claudia Black!

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Healing in Numbers: The Power of Group and Family Therapy in Recovery

We have an exciting new podcast with guest Dr. Claudia Black! We had an insightful and educational time discussing Dr. Black’s professional and personal experiences. We also explored what drew her to focus on behavioral health, adolescent treatment, and healing dysfunctional families. Dr. Black has authored multiple books on addiction, children of addiction, how families heal, and much more.

Listen to this fascinating episode with Dr. Black here!

Past Experience and Background

Dr. Claudia Black is the clinical architect of the Claudia Black Young Adult Center with the Meadows. She’s a renowned author and speaker, and a trailblazer in the field of addiction and family systems therapy. Her work shaped the awareness and healing surrounding adult children of parents with substance use disorders, and children from dysfunctional and abusive families. Clinicians around the world use her frameworks to understand, and treat, addiction and dysfunction within family systems. 

C Black scaled

Dr. Black grew up in a dysfunctional home herself, a child of a father struggling with alcohol use disorder. She deeply understands the effects dysfunction and addiction have on families, especially adolescents. Dr. Black brings a unique blend of empathy and clinical expertise to her treatment, books, and our conversation in this episode with host Dr. Malasri Chaudhery-Malgeri (Editor-in-Chief) and co-host Cliff McDonald (Chief Growth Officer).

Group Work as a Pillar in Successful Treatment

Dr. Black primarily works with adolescents, developing a campus and program specifically for young adults after recognizing they learn and respond to treatment much differently than older peers. For this age group and others, Dr. Black has seen profound benefits with group therapy. She notes,

“And…the advantages of group work, I think the biggest advantage is what I’ve really already stated. It is a major shame reducer. There is so much healing that comes with the possibility of connecting with somebody else who, on a gut level, knows exactly what you’re talking about.” 

She adds another truth patients often realize through group work: 

“It’s okay for me to be vulnerable because there is nothing wrong with me. And I understand that because there’s nothing really wrong with you. This is what happened to you. And I like you. You’re really an okay person. Therefore I must be okay too.” 

Dr. Claudia Black eloquently highlights the transformative power of group therapy in recovery, and how it can significantly reduce shame by connecting patients with others who truly understand their struggles. She also highlights a vital realization created in group settings: the acceptance of vulnerability. Patients learn that being vulnerable is acceptable because their core selves are intact and unblemished by their experiences. This mutual recognition of inherent worth helps patients accept themselves and others, creating a supportive community where everyone can feel truly ‘okay’.

Healing Emotional Abandonment in Dysfunctional Families

Much of Dr. Black’s work focuses on healing emotional abandonment, which can take many forms and roles. Her books and speeches cover the realities of growing up with parents with substance use disorders, abusive parents, and emotionally unavailable parents. Dr. Black defines emotional abandonment, stating,

“Emotional abandonment is when you have to hide a part of who you are in order to be acceptable.”

Emotional abandonment can skew what children believe about themselves, especially as they grow into adults. For example, they may believe showing emotion is weak or being kind to others opens them up for attack. Dr. Black adds,

“So what are these parts of self that I’m having to hide? Was it okay to make a mistake in this family? Or did you learn that if you did anything less than perfect, there was something wrong with you? Was it okay for you to have feelings?” 

As a result of emotional abandonment from abuse, emotional detachment, or absent parenting, children can turn to substances and illicit practices to find comfort and community. 

This quote poignantly addresses the deep-seated fears and insecurities many people carry into adulthood, often stemming from their familial environments. It challenges us to reflect on the parts of ourselves we’ve felt compelled to hide, questioning whether our upbringing allowed room for mistakes or if perfection was the unattainable standard. This introspection helps us understand and heal the internalized beliefs that may hinder our personal growth and emotional well-being.

Substance Use to Numb Emotional Pain

One of Dr. Black’s books, It Will Never Happen to Me!, highlights the connection between children of addiction and becoming a substance user themselves, despite seeing the effects and damage of addiction first-hand.

She notes how children of addiction almost always experience emotional abandonment, which can lead to substance use as a way to cope with the pain and manage their emotions on their own. As they get older, children of addiction and/or abusive parents may also use substances to numb painful memories and the trauma of their experiences. Even if these children, who watch their parents suffer with addiction, vow to live differently, they can end up following the same pattern. Dr. Black says, 

“If becoming addicted was an issue of willpower, children of addiction would be the last ones to become addicted. But it has nothing to do with willpower. What happens is alcohol or drugs can do something for this child that it doesn’t have to do for somebody else. It can give them a greater sense of confidence. It can give them courage. It can give them a sense of empowerment against the powerlessness in their life.”

The Role of Family Therapy and How It Works

Family therapy is an important part of treatment for all age groups, but especially young adults. Dr. Black deftly explains the importance of family therapy, anxieties and misconceptions family members may have, and how the patient and their loved ones can optimize the experience for their collective healing. 

Dr. Black notes common fears loved ones have coming into treatment:

“Anybody who walks into the treatment setting is very scared. It’s very vulnerable, in a way that is foreign to them.” … “So they’re, they don’t want to be part of a treatment program because they feel so guilty or they feel like they’re going to be blamed.”

These anxieties and fears are some of the reasons why Dr. Black and many other treatment providers focus on creating a welcoming, non-judgemental space for families to learn more about the condition their loved one has and discuss their experiences. What this reaps is:

“…the patient, the identified patient, the client themselves who goes to treatment, probably has a better chance of recovery typically when family members participate in family programming and ultimately experience their own recovery process.”

Sessions with loved ones often center on education, helping them understand each aspect of the patient’s behavior and conditions. It also helps them understand their own needs and recovery process. Dr. Black says, 

“Most of the family members, when they leave, will walk away saying, I couldn’t believe that I’d have a recovery process. I didn’t even know that I had something that I needed to recover from.”

“People Are So Resilient”

Dr. Black describes the inspiring sense of resilience each person has, and how that contributes to their recovery journey. She also describes real stories of resilience in her book Undaunted Hope. On resilience, she says, 

“So being able to recognize that some of what was survivorship is where our resiliency is today, as well. You get to keep the strengths that you created. A lot of dysfunction or a lot of trauma in your life, you get to keep the strengths. You just want to take away the rigidity of those strengths.”

Dr. Black gives an example of someone used to taking control and taking care of others. They turn out to be a natural leader, which is an inner strength, but can be over controlling and micro-manage. Loosening the reins allows this person to still lead, but be a better listener, more receptive to feedback, and gentler in how they communicate. 

Promising Trends and Innovations in Addiction Treatment

Dr. Black pointed out new trends in addiction treatment and suggestions for how providers can offer better care. One, she suggests new providers read her book Undaunted Hope for the real-life experiences highlighted in the book and stories of resilience. She adds,

“You have to know addiction. You don’t have to specialize in the field of addictive disorders. But you can not, as a mental health professional, work in this field and not know addiction and be open to the fact that that could be what it is that’s going on.”

As far as emerging trends and needs, Dr. Black says, 

“I think that we need to pay more attention to long term, what supports long term recovery and that, from an inpatient treatment standpoint, 45 days is not enough. It’s a wonderful start, but I don’t think that we’ve given credence to those next handful of months into this first couple of years.”

Dr. Black sheds light on evolving trends in addiction treatment and offers critical guidance for care providers. She emphasizes the importance of a deep understanding of addiction, regardless of a provider’s specialization, highlighting that it is essential knowledge for any mental health professional. Dr. Black also advocates for a reassessment of treatment times, pointing out that while a 45-day inpatient program is a good start, it doesn’t always support long-term recovery. She stresses the need for extending care well beyond these initial stages, which can significantly bolster recovery outcomes.


This episode was rich in information and wisdom. To find out more about this episode and Dr. Claudia Black’s work, listen to her podcast here!

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What Is Self-Harm and Why Is It Done?

*Trigger warning: This article includes details and discussions of self-harm.*

Self-harm is self-inflicted and harmful behavior done without the intent of death. Examples include cutting, burning, and bruising the skin. Picking at wounds and pulling hair may also be self-harm. 

Self-harm is often used to manage strong emotional pain, express intense emotions, and escape numbness. It’s not typically done to initiate suicide, but someone who self-harms is more likely to die by suicide1.

Understanding Self-Harm

Self-harm can be confusing and difficult to understand, whether you or a loved one do it. It can seem illogical—causing pain to escape the pain. Knowing the reasons behind it can help you support a loved one or learn more about how treatment can help you. 

Definitions and Forms of Self-Harm

Self-harm is defined as inflicting physical harm to yourself on purpose1. It’s more common in teens and women. Some people will only do it a few times; others may struggle to stop once they start. Media representation (TV shows or movies) commonly portrays self-harm as cutting the skin, but it actually takes many forms. Here’s some examples:

  • Burning the skin with matches, a lighter, or another source of fire. Chemical substances can also cause burns.
  • Punching or hitting to cause bruising or broken bones.
  • Scratching, piercing or cutting the skin with razors and other sharp objects.
  • Pulling out hair. 
  • Ingesting toxic substances, like drugs, high doses of medications, and chemical cleaners to inflict harm.
  • Any self-inflicted behavior intended to cause physical harm. 

Though self-harm can cause injuries that need medical treatment (and even life-threatening injuries), it differs from suicide attempts in that the person does not intend to die. Suicide attempts are often intended to cause death, while self-harm is used as a coping tool. 

For example, someone may cut deeper than intended, requiring immediate medical care for a wound that could have killed them. This differs from a suicide attempt because they did not make that cut with the intention or hope to die.

The Psychology Behind Self-Harm

Self-harm commonly occurs as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions2, including anger, grief, and numbness. It’s also frequently used as a tool for self-punishment. Some people self-harm to gain attention and help from others (also called a cry for help). Others may self-harm for all 3 reasons. In any case, they need and deserve help.

Self-harm also serves as an emotional outlet2 and provides a sense of control. It can provide a more continuous distraction from intense emotional pain, as the inflictor often needs to bandage and care for their recurring wounds, which also offers a sense of control and can provide nurturing not otherwise received. 

Though it seems counterintuitive, self-harm can release endorphins3 as the body responds to pain. This can spike your adrenaline and improve your mood, which offers an escape from numbness and a break in intensely low mood. But it’s only temporary. 

Addressing The Stigma Around Self-Harm

The stigma surrounding self-harm claims it’s a sign of weakness and attention-seeking, which can cause people to feel ashamed and unwilling to ask for help. Cuts, scars, and bruises also don’t align with most beauty standards, which can cause further shame. 

Shame can cause a cycle of self-harming, as continuous harm reinstates shame, which can cause ongoing self-harm. Hiding injuries and crafting cover-up stories can also fuel shame and cause even greater stress, which can feed the cycle.

To break through the stigma, you can practice empathy and compassion—towards yourself and others. Educate yourself on self-harm to better understand its causes; this can help you approach conversations about getting help with greater confidence and compassion. You can also advocate for yourself or others by correcting common misconceptions about self-harm. Discuss it as a symptom of overwhelming pain, not an inability to cope with it. If people don’t understand and are not willing to try, you can leave them out of your journey.

Factors Contributing to Self-Harm

Self-harm isn’t usually the first way people try to manage strong emotions and cope with pain. People may even seek treatment but ultimately not get the relief they need. And since self-harm can offer momentary relief or distraction, stopping may sound pointless and daunting—why quit something that works? Fear can then contribute to repeated self-harm: fear of giving up potentially the only coping tool you have.

Treating underlying conditions, beginning treatment as soon as possible, and catching the signs early can prevent self-harm and the fear of letting it go. 

Emotional Distress and Mental Health Disorders

Conditions like depression, anxiety, trauma, and borderline personality disorder can contribute to and cause self-harm as a symptom. Here’s why:

Pre-existing mental health conditions can largely contribute to and cause self-harm, but so can your environment, the people around you, and the media you take in.

Environmental and Social Influences

Bullying, family dynamics, and peer pressure can lead to self-harm. Media may also create curiosity around self-harm, which could lead to experimentation, and then a habit that becomes hard to break. Some TV shows and movies geared toward teens vividly show (and often romanticize) self-harm. This can prompt teens to replicate the behavior or see it as the only way to deal with negative emotions. 

Similarly, and especially for teens in middle or high school, being in a peer environment where self-harm is normalized and romanticized can lead to experimentation. Teens may self-harm to fit in, to relate to their friends, or to gain sympathy from classmates (which is often a genuine cry for help). Bullying can cause self-harm as a way to cope with emotional pain and as a form of self-punishment.

Signs and Symptoms of Self-Harm

If you’re worried about a loved one or a friend self-harming, you can keep a few warning signs in mind as you note their physical and emotional changes. If you do notice any signs, try to keep your questions gentle and centered on concern. Make sure your emotional state invites vulnerability. Though distressing, self-harm and the causes behind it are treatable.

Warning Signs of Self-Harm

If you’re a parent, a teacher, a sibling, or a concerned friend, you can keep a lookout for the following signs of self-harm in someone you care about.

  1. Suddenly spending time alone, usually in a shut or locked room. This could be their bedroom, bathroom, or another area of your house. 
  2. Unexplained injuries, cuts, or burns.
  3. Taking or hoarding first-aid supplies. 
  4. Finding blood on their clothes, sheets, and used first-aid supplies (like gauze or bandages).
  5. Wearing full-coverage clothes and seeming particular about not revealing their arms, legs, stomach, or other areas they’re normally okay with showing. This may be especially noticeable in the summertime (like wearing a hoodie in hot weather). 
  6. Items like razor blades, knives, lighters, or other self-harm tools going missing in your home. You may find them tucked away into a hiding place in their room or bathroom. School lockers can also hide supplies.
  7. Behavioral changes like seeming down, tearful, and hopeless.
  8. Acting withdrawn and unfocused in social and family situations.
  9. Flinching or seeming in pain when certain parts of their body are bumped or touched. 

Starting The Conversation and Next Steps

Remember: noticing these signs may mean your loved one needs help, but with that help, they’ll learn to heal. Keep that in mind as you bring your concerns to light. You can start with gentle questions about their behaviors and items you may have noticed go missing, like self-harm tools and first-aid supplies. You may ask something like,

“I’ve noticed you seem very down and that you spend a lot of time in your room. I’ve also found band-aid wrappers hidden in the trash. You aren’t in trouble if you say yes, but I want to know if you are hurting yourself.”

If your loved one answers yes, they have been hurting themselves, you may need to see the wounds to make sure they don’t need medical attention. If they’re unwilling to show you but agree they need treatment, you can offer to take them to urgent care or the emergency room. 

If they don’t need immediate medical treatment, you can discuss getting help in other ways. Acknowledge and validate their pain, avoid judgment, and encourage them with the vast array of treatments available to people who self-harm (like therapy, peer support groups, virtual care, outpatient care, and even residential rehabs). When they’re ready, you can help them take the first steps into treatment.

Depending on your relationship, you may be able to control their environment in the meantime. If you’re the parent of a child who self-harms, for example, you may gather and hide all your knives, razors, lighters, and other self-harming tools as a preventive measure. You can also set rules about alone time (like limiting it to an hour a day, keeping their door open, or requiring frequent check-ins) to keep a closer eye on them and their behaviors. 

In some cases, alone time may not be safe in any sense. Consider going to the emergency room to get admitted to a psychiatric hospital, where your loved one receives continuous monitoring in a safe environment. 

Support and Treatment Options

Many forms of treatment and therapy can help you or your loved one heal from self-harm and its underlying causes. 

Professional Help and Therapies

Behavioral therapies address the unhealthy or inaccurate thoughts and emotions leading to behaviors like self-harm. Examples include:

  • Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which addresses and challenges the emotions causing self-harm, like anger, shame, and grief. Using CBT, a therapist will help their patient determine the validity of their thoughts, prevent spiraling, and reshape their thought patterns. 
  • Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) helps manage intense emotions and teaches tools for coping and resilience. Rather than challenging or changing thoughts, DBT helps patients accept the thought and manage how they respond to it. For example, someone experiencing intense emotions may respond with a coping tool they learned in therapy, not with self-harm.
  • Problem-Solving Therapy8 uses skill and attitude training to see problems as solvable, promote rationalization, and reduce impulsivity. This therapy can be especially helpful for adolescents with depression, suicidality, and self-harming behaviors.

Self-Care Strategies and Coping Mechanisms

Alongside professional help, you can also practice self-care strategies and at-home coping mechanisms for self-harm. Here are a few of those strategies and practices you can try:

  • The ice-cube method: Hold an ice cube in your hand (or your mouth) when emotions become intense and overwhelming. The cold ice cube serves as a neurological distraction9 and can give you mental clarity. Relief and clearer thinking can then prevent self-harm.
  • Exercise: Fitness can serve as a distraction8 and an action. Let out emotions through weight-lifting, boxing, running, or taking a walk. 
  • Drawing/doodling: Making shapes, lines, or drawings can release emotions and give a sense of accomplishment. You can make angry slashes with your pen over the page, slowly color in shapes, or draw lines over and over. You can even add words and combine journaling with doodling.
  • Busy your hands: Whether you have to sit on them, play with a fidget toy, or simply run them over textured fabric, keeping your hands busy can help distract you until the urge to self-harm fades.
  • Tear something apart: Rip up paper, food, or something you’re okay with tearing. This serves as a distraction and an emotional outlet, which can prevent self-harm by satiating the need to do so.
  • Tell someone: Let a trusted friend or family member know when you feel the urge to self-harm. They can keep you company (even virtually) and keep you accountable by checking in. You don’t even have to specifically mention self-harm, just let them know you need support.
  • Remove yourself from your environment: Physically step away from your current environment and the potential self-harm tools within it. Ideally, you could go on a walk to get outside and separate from your home or other living environment. If you can’t, move to another room or seek company with a family member.
  • Make your environment as safe as you can: As you feel able, remove, destroy, or throw away self-harm tools. Give your stash to someone to get rid of. Tell a trusted family member to hide or lock up other self-harm tools in your home. These could include knives, shaving razors, and other sharp tools.
  • Be kind to yourself: The recovery journey for self-harm isn’t a straight line. You may go one, two, even 10+ days (or months) without self-harming, but end up doing it again. That’s okay. Don’t see it as failing, rather as a bump in your road to recovery—and you’re still on the road. Remind yourself of that often.

Self-care strategies can reduce your overall stress and promote wellness day-to-day. Here are a few techniques you can try:

  1. Set aside time to relax and do something you enjoy. Schedule yourself an hour each night (or however long you can) to read, meditate, craft, or call a friend.
  2. Stay hydrated and incorporate more whole foods into your diet to fuel and nourish your body.
  3. Get outside to soak in sunlight and Vitamin D—try walking through your neighborhood, taking your dog to a park, or sitting on your balcony.
  4. Prioritize good sleep. Follow a nighttime routine and try to wake up at the same time each morning to even out your sleep cycle.
  5. Move your body through exercise, yoga, playing with a pet, or taking walks. You could also take up new sports or hobbies like hiking, swimming, and rollerblading.

Prevention and Building Resilience

Changing the narrative around self-harm and offering education can prevent teens and adults from using it as a coping tool. To combat the glamorization of self-harm, schools, peers, and teachers can instead educate vulnerable teens on the realities of self-harm and what it means for their health. 

Knowing your treatment options can also serve as a prevention tool, as someone may not feel drawn to self-harm if other sources of relief are readily available (like therapy, support groups, or crisis services). The earlier schools and other organizations can make these resources available, the better.

Find Help and Hope

Understanding self-harm is the first step towards offering the necessary support and compassion to those in need. It’s about looking beyond the behavior and recognizing the underlying pain, offering a helping hand in their journey toward healing. Remember, with the right approach and resources, recovery is not just a possibility but a reality. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm, seek help from a professional to navigate the path to recovery together. You can also find rehabs with self-harm treatment by browsing Recovery.com.

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How To Deal With My Husband’s Addiction

Dealing with a loved one’s addiction has no set blueprint, but learning how to cope with your husband’s addiction can help you both heal. Addiction’s deep roots and substantial impacts on life can make dealing with it feel impossible. But with the right treatment and support, you and your husband can find recovery.

What Should I Do About My Husband Being Addicted to Drugs or Alcohol?

If your husband is addicted to drugs or alcohol, know you can’t force them to get better. You can support them in their treatment journey, offer encouragement, and set boundaries, but you can’t cure them. That’s okay; you’re not meant to. 

What you should or shouldn’t do also depends on your unique situation. Spouses in abusive relationships may not feel safe acknowledging their husband’s addiction or suggesting they get treatment. If you’re in an abusive relationship, you have several resources for help. You can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline, the National Sexual Assault Hotline, and 911 (or your local emergency number) if you’re in imminent danger. 

Some spouses may feel comfortable with a direct, confrontational approach. How you go about it can differ widely from one relationship to the next. Your unique relationship can determine what you do and don’t do about your husband’s addiction. Here are a few examples:

Have a Discussion About Getting Help

You can raise your concerns during a conversation. For example, you could say:

“I’ve noticed you’re drinking more and regularly getting tipsy or drunk. I don’t think this is good for you, and it makes me uncomfortable. I want to help you get help. What do you think about starting treatment?”

In this discussion, you can gauge their willingness to seek treatment. Be sure you tell your husband how their drinking affects you, your relationship, and the children you may have. Let them know you’re there to support and encourage them through treatment.

Set Boundaries and Avoid Enabling

You likely spend a lot of time with your husband. They live with you, see you daily, and may also parent with you. It’s natural to want to help them in any way you can, but that can lead to enabling behaviors and the loss of your personal boundaries.

You can prevent this by setting healthy boundaries as soon as you can. Establish immediately that you won’t cover their absences, give them money, or make excuses for their behavior. That can help keep your time and emotional wellness intact. You can also refuse to take responsibility for the consequences of their actions. 

Giving money, making excuses, or taking on their responsibilities can enable your husband’s addiction. Doing so can make them feel more comfortable not seeking treatment or help.

How to Cope with Husband’s Addiction

Coping strategies can help you stay mentally well. Remember, your coping strategies are to help you cope, not your husband. You’re not responsible for fixing them. What you can do is help yourself; that way, you’ll be in a place to offer support and encouragement.

Spend Time With Them Mindfully

Be watchful of the time you spend with your husband. If they’re actively addicted to drugs or alcohol, spending all your free time with them may negatively impact your mental health. Time away from them can help you set priorities and stay aware of your emotions and feelings. 

Practice Self-Care

Maintaining a self-care regime can help you cope with your husband’s addiction. Self-care could look different for everyone. Examples include:

  • Time set aside for your hobbies and interests
  • Taking care of your body–skincare, exercise, and good sleep
  • Meeting up with friends and loved ones
  • Making yourself nutritious meals and stay hydrated

Get Professional Treatment

Going to therapy can help you cope with your husband’s addiction. Your therapist or counselor can help you process challenges, create a toolset of coping skills, and help you formulate action plans. Loved ones can also join family support groups to connect with other families.

Discover Support for Family Members

Spouses and other family members have options for support. Peer groups meet worldwide to connect, offer encouragement, and share in each other’s challenges. One of these groups is Al-Anon, created for the loved ones of alcoholics. It follows a similar structure of AA/NA meetings.

Family members can also join Nar-Anon, which supports family members of someone struggling with a drug addiction. Learn to Cope offers peer support in person and online. SMART Recovery (non-12-Step) also has groups and resources for families.

In these groups, you’ll meet with other family members and a facilitator will lead the group. You’ll have the chance to share your experiences, offer and receive support, and find encouragement in shared struggles. Your groups may have a theme, like processing grief or trauma from your loved one’s addiction, or be a more broad sharing experience.

You could also find support groups in your local community. Some community centers, churches, or religious organizations have family peer support groups. Check your local resources (webpage for your city, social media groups) to see what’s available. 

You can also attend family therapy with your husband. Many treatment centers offer this service to help you and your spouse heal together. You can also attend family therapy in an outpatient setting.

Treatment Options for Your Husband’s Addiction

When your husband feels ready and committed to treatment, they’ll have many options to choose from. His clinical needs, history of substance use, and preferences determine which level of care will be the best fit. His doctor can assess his current state with addiction and recommend a level of care, or staff at a rehabilitation center may make the assessment before admitting your husband into treatment.

Questions to Ask Your Provider

Your husband can ask several questions at the initial doctor’s appointment to clarify his needs and treatment pathway. Here are a few to keep in mind as he embarks on this journey:

  1. What level of care would suit my situation and symptoms best?
  2. Do I have a co-occurring mental health condition?
  3. Will medications improve my symptoms, and would you recommend them?
  4. What are the potential side effects of those medications?
  5. Will I need to detox?
  6. What other care options and resources would you recommend?

Levels of Care for Addiction

Many people begin their treatment journey in detox to rid their bodies of addictive substances safely. Some people won’t need detox; it’s always best to let your doctor or a treatment facility decide. From there, your husband may progress through each level of care or start and stop at one level.

  • Detox: a safe, monitored phase where your husband will stop taking substances and let them clear from his system. Medications can make this process safer and more comfortable. It’s not recommended to detox at home since detoxing can cause potentially harmful withdrawal symptoms.
  • Residential Treatment: live-in treatment with 24/7 monitoring, structured schedules, and onsite treatment. Your husband will attend various therapies to address the root cause of their addiction. Many residential rehabs allow family visits and provide family therapy.
  • Day Treatment: your husband will live at home or in a sober living residence (living in a house with other peers in sobriety; strict no-substance rules) and attend about 30 hours of weekly treatment. 
  • Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP): similar to day treatment, but your husband will spend less time in treatment. Some IOPs have day or evening programs for greater flexibility. He’ll spend about 20 hours in weekly treatment and have more time for work and family.  
  • General Outpatient: two or three weekly therapy sessions, usually in a group setting. Your husband will live at home or in sober living.

Locate a Detox Center

Detox may be the first step in your husband’s recovery journey. It can also be the first step to a healthier marriage and improved mental health. Detox centers have experience detoxing clients from alcohol and a wide range of illegal and prescribed drugs. 
To find a detox center, use Recovery.com to browse detox centers in your area and view photos, insurance information, and reviews.

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Empowering Support: Resources and Strategies for Loved Ones in Mental Health and Addiction Treatment

Addiction and mental health conditions don’t only affect the individual—they affect the entire family unit. If you know someone in recovery, chances are you are a part of the healing process. 

Support from loved ones plays a critical role in the treatment journey, not just as a supplementary aspect of care but as a core component of successful recovery. Your help is a profound act of love, but it comes with challenges. Loved ones can face obstacles that test their resilience, patience, and emotional stability. Understanding these challenges is crucial for developing strategies to navigate them effectively. 

Understanding the Role of Loved Ones

Each person’s journey with recovery looks different, and so does the support of their loved ones. Regardless of when you joined their treatment journey, your help matters. 

When a person undergoes addiction or mental health treatment, support from loved ones can greatly improve their outcomes1. Family engagement can lead to fewer relapses, longer duration between relapses, reduced hospital admissions, shorter inpatient stays, and improved compliance to medication and treatment plans.

These massive patient benefits are likely why you want to help your loved one through recovery; however, witnessing their struggle with mental health issues or addiction can be emotionally taxing2. The constant worry and need to provide ongoing support can be physically and mentally exhausting. This can lead to emotional burnout3, where the supporter feels overwhelmed and unable to continue providing care effectively.

Assisting a loved one through treatment requires patience, understanding, and a compassionate approach. Your guidance during this time is invaluable; however, remember that you don’t have to do it alone. There are many resources to support you and your loved one during recovery.

Types of Resources Available

To support your loved one to the best of your abilities, you will need outside help. Fortunately, there are multiple avenues available.

Educational Resources

Substance use disorders and mental health conditions can be very complex. The more you know about the condition(s), and what your loved one is going through, the better equipped you both are to navigate recovery.

To learn more about different disorders, types of treatment, insurance coverage for rehab, and more, visit our Resource Library to explore comprehensive articles covering a variety of educational topics.

You may also do your own research and talk to medical professionals to stay informed. Reading up on the condition(s) can provide you with a basic understanding of the symptoms, treatments, and potential risks. Speaking with a doctor or your loved one’s care team can offer personalized insights and information. 

Support Groups

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA) groups use the 12-Steps program as their foundation. AA and NA hosts meetings for family members of people with substance or behavioral addictions to learn from the others’ shared experiences. They offer in-person or virtual groups across the country. Find an Al-Anon or Nar-Anon group near you. 

SMART Recovery also offers family support groups, however they differ from the 12 Steps by focusing on one’s resilience and ability to overcome addiction rather than a higher power.

For those with a loved one in mental health care, the National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) provides family support groups. During sessions, peers discuss their experiences to foster understanding and hope. You may work on coping skills, forgiving yourself for past mistakes, releasing judgment, and embracing resilience. Groups are free and confidential. Find a NAMI family support group near you.

Therapy and Counseling

Family therapy will likely be an option as part of your loved one’s treatment plan. Addiction and mental health treatment is more effective with family therapy4, helping both the person in recovery and loved ones. By making positive changes in family dynamics, therapy can reduce the stress of having a loved one in treatment and improve how families treat each other as a whole. In a family therapy session, you can set boundaries, work on communication skills, and resolve conflicts.

You may choose to seek professional 1:1 counseling. It can provide a confidential and safe space for you to process your feelings, develop coping strategies, and maintain your well-being while supporting your loved one. Your therapist might help you communicate your boundaries, prioritize self-care, and practice stress management techniques.

Strategies for Supporting Treatment

Supporting a loved one through treatment for mental health issues or addiction is a compassionate yet complex journey. It requires patience, understanding, and a proactive attitude to support your loved one and take care of your own well-being. A well-rounded approach, emphasizing helpful communication, is key. 

Effective Communication Techniques

Talking to someone who’s experiencing addiction or mental health issues can be an opportunity to show your empathy and understanding5. You can approach these conversations with a calm and non-judgmental attitude. Show that you genuinely care and want to listen. And be clear that you’re concerned about them.

Encourage them to share their feelings by asking open-ended questions like “Can you tell me what you’ve been going through?” or “How have you been feeling lately?” 

Try to make your loved one feel seen by acknowledging their experiences. You can say things such as “Tell me how you are feeling, I care about your feelings and well-being,” or “I am right here for you. Tell me how I can help you.” Empathize with what they’re experiencing—they’ll be more likely to trust you for help.

Your loved one is going through a challenging time, so try your best to be patient. Stay calm and collected when they tell you about their feelings. Make sure they know that they don’t have to go through this alone. Remind them that seeking help is a positive step.

Setting Boundaries and Practicing Self-Care

Setting healthy boundaries can help maintain a positive relationship dynamic and prevent enabling behaviors. Boundaries are essential for both your loved one and yourself, as supporting someone in recovery can be emotionally taxing.

For example, you can express that you won’t participate in activities or situations that enable their addiction, but you’ll support their recovery efforts. This could look like withholding money they would use to buy drugs or not bailing them out of jail. You can offer your help finding appropriate treatment and stay consistent with your support. 

Take care of yourself by setting healthy boundaries, seeking support from others, and practicing self-care. You cannot care for someone else if you are not taking care of your own needs first.

Encouraging and Reinforcing Positive Behaviors

Recognizing both big and small achievements propel the recovery journey. Your loved one is likely to sustain recovery by staying positive and motivated6. Conversations should stay optimistic and realistic—acknowledge their hard work and express your belief that they can overcome these challenges. You can offer regular support and words of affirmation with your love and confidence in their ability to recover. 

Milestones could look like attending therapy sessions regularly, reaching sobriety cornerstones,  or simply having a good day. You can personalize celebrations to what your loved one finds meaningful and enjoyable, such as a favorite meal or a small gathering with close friends and family. 

Establishing traditions around milestones can give your loved one something to look forward to. For example, for each month of sobriety, you might plant a new flower in the garden.

Ways to Help Loved Ones Help Themselves

One of the best ways you can help your loved one is by guiding them towards tools to effectively sustain recovery by themselves. Your loved one may deal with uncomfortable feelings for the rest of their life because of their condition(s). Creating healthy habits can manage discomfort during their journey.

Outside of professional treatment, your loved one can participate in multiple self-reflection and self-care techniques to support their recovery. Taking time to reflect on personal values and treatment goals can help your loved one stay aligned with their desires. Journaling can be therapeutic7, so encourage them to write responses to questions such as 

  1. What events or decisions led you to this point in your recovery journey? How do you feel about them now?
  2. What triggers have you identified that impact your mental health or addiction? What healthy coping mechanisms have you found effective?
  3. What are the most important lessons you’ve learned from your experiences before and during recovery?
  4. What achievements, big or small, have you made in your recovery? How did you accomplish them?
  5. What personal strengths have you discovered or strengthened through your recovery process? How have they helped you?
  6. How has your journey affected your relationships with family and friends? Are there relationships that need mending or strengthening?
  7. What are you grateful for today? How does gratitude impact your recovery journey?
  8. Write a letter to yourself expressing compassion and understanding for your journey. What would you say?

You could offer to engage in healthy activities with your loved one to support their recovery. You might take a walk or do yoga with them for exercise, and you could make healthy, nutritious dinners with them. Your loved one may enjoy creative outlets such as painting, so you could do a weekly paint night with them. And promote supportive relationships with family, friends, or support groups who understand and encourage their recovery journey.

By integrating these healthy self-care practices into daily life, your loved one in recovery can build a strong foundation for sustained well-being and resilience. You play a valuable role in their treatment journey, so be sure to give yourself the love and recognition you deserve. With your help and professional support, your loved one can create a healthier, more fulfilling life.

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What Is Generational Trauma? Definition, Examples, and Effects

Generational trauma affects a generation’s worldview, mental health, and overall well-being, starting with something that happened to the parents. Their children, and their children’s children, can carry the effects of trauma despite not living through it. 

Generational trauma can be passed down through learned behaviors, parenting styles, and can influence children’s genetics, predisposing them to mental and physical health challenges. 

What Causes Generational Trauma?

Generational trauma is caused by a parent, or both parents, experiencing trauma1 and transmitting it to their children. The parents can be part of a collective group, like Holocaust survivors, or singular survivors of a traumatic event like childhood abuse, disasters, or rape. 

Children with generational trauma don’t experience the trauma directly. Instead, the effects of it pass down from their parents and can leave their children with symptoms and worldviews as if they did directly experience it. Without treatment, generational trauma can pass down through multiple generations.

Examples of Generational Trauma

Generational trauma can affect entire groups and races. For example, Indigenous and minority communities still feel the effects of racism, brutality, and segregation. Survivors of war and Holocaust survivors similarly experience collective generational trauma. 

Since generational traumas often impact a group’s culture and way of life, newer generations may collectively seek out more information about their history and the traumas affecting them in the present day. Some groups and races may not be comfortable with that yet, but many are. Here are a few examples of generational trauma in specific groups/races/communities.

Indigenous Communities

Residential schools in America and Canada housed Indigenous children in an attempt to disseminate their culture, impose religion2, and ultimately force Indigenous children to adopt a Western culture. Malnutrition, racism, violence, genocide, and abuse in and out of residential schools imposed trauma that’s extended over generations.

Indigenous communities bear generational trauma as a collective group, with singular instances of trauma in each unique family and community. Children and grandchildren of those who were in residential schools and victims of colonization can feel the effects of their trauma despite not having gone through it themselves.

Asian Communities

Past wars, immigration, imperialism, and racism can all cause generational trauma in Asian families and their community as a whole. Many Asian Americans also bear the “model minority” label3, where generations are continually expected to behave with gratitude towards America and to forget the trauma in their past (and America’s contribution to it). Thus, silence can prevail between generations, which further distributes generational trauma3. 

Black Communities

Slavery, racism, segregation, and violence impacted black communities from the slave trade and continued racism from it. Black families and communities in America share a haunting past of death, brutality, and inhumanity that still carries into the present. As a result, generational trauma can pass through families and affect generation after generation.

African Americans have been segregated and not seen as equals. Racial violence has been hidden and expected to be forgotten. Even in present-day America, issues like these continue to affect new generations and promote further generational trauma. 

Holocaust Survivors

The men, women, and children who survived the Holocaust (1933-1945) can carry the burden of generational trauma. Murder, assault, racism, and genocide impacted Jewish families and left deep scars in their lineage. Survivors experienced unforgettable horrors and developed post-traumatic stress disorder.

The effects of the trauma passed through generations of Jewish families in and outside Europe. The brutality of the Holocaust continues to shake and affect Germany, European countries, and America despite efforts of justice and healing.

Other Genocide Survivors

Several countries and cultural groups within them have experienced genocide. Rwanda, for example, experienced genocide in 1994. Genocide has also happened in Darfur, Bosnia, Herzegovina, China, Ukraine, Armenia, and more. Murder, violence, theft, and rape were often used as weapons. 

Those who survive genocide are often left with emotional scars. Many women and girls, for example, were raped and mutilated. The communities and cultures who survived genocide bear the weight of it and can pass that down in future generations, especially as groups try to rebuild relationships and reestablish harmony. 

How Is Generational Trauma Passed Down? 

Trauma can pass through parenting styles, imposed worldviews, and, as research recently suggests, genetics. For example, mothers in the Holocaust were found to pass on the genetic changes4 that dysregulated their stress response. That’s because of epigenetics, or how your environment and behaviors affect how your genes work5. Biological and genetic changes can make children more disposed to inherited health and mental health conditions.

Silence can be the catalyst3 for generational trauma. Older generations may not feel comfortable talking about, or at all acknowledging, their trauma. Burying their trauma can inadvertently pass it on to their children, who pick up on their traumatized state and adapt in response. 

Children may adapt by becoming overprotective1 of their parents, by holding onto the trauma and attaching to it, and by taking their parent’s view of the world to maintain their idea of safety. They may see the world as unsafe, unfriendly, and feel isolated by what their parents or grandparents went through. 

How Does Generational Trauma Affect Families?

Families can become disconnected and distant as a result of generational trauma. Parents experiencing PTSD and trauma may struggle to form secure attachments to their kids, affecting their emotional growth and wellness. An unwillingness to talk about obvious trauma can frustrate children and derail their desire to heal. 

Children may also feel the burden of fixing the trauma. They may see how it affects their parents and subconsciously decide perfection can fix their parent’s problems and restore their family. Perfectionism, anxiety, and obsessions can then pass down to their children and extend the original trauma’s effects. 

Ultimately, unacknowledged and untreated generational trauma can forfeit familial closeness and intimacy. Parents and children can then turn to maladaptive coping strategies, like substance use, to cope with the initial trauma and its later effects.

Effects of Generational Trauma

Generational trauma has a few key effects6, including:

  • Fused identity with parents and what they experienced
  • Poor self-esteem
  • Self criticism—”Why am I struggling with this when my parents had to go through ___?”
  • Worrying the initial trauma will happen again
  • Guilt
  • Hypervigilance
  • Mental health conditions, like anxiety and depression

Breaking The Cycle of Generational Trauma

If silence is the catalyst of generational trauma, then conversation is its mediator3. Having open conversations about the traumatic experience educates children, helps older generations process, and can prevent trauma’s effects from passing further. 

In these conversations, emphasizing collective resilience can help survivors3 and their children heal. Collective resilience occurs when a group comes together to get through a challenge, rather than isolating, and recognizes their strength. Facing generational trauma can make future generations more adaptive6 and resilient to future challenges. 

Leaning into tradition and culture can empower old and new generations and instill resilience. Storytelling, traditional activities, and other cultural practices can help survivors acknowledge what happened, its effects, and their efforts toward collective healing.

Parents can also prioritize mental health treatment to improve how they communicate with their kids, how they react to challenges, and how they cope with trauma they experienced without it inadvertently affecting their parenting. 

How to Heal Generational Trauma

Parents and their children—and their children—can also heal from generational trauma through mental health treatment. A mental health professional, like a therapist, psychologist, or counselor, can help those affected by generational trauma process the past and move into the present.

A mental health professional can also help challenge worldviews affected by generational trauma and expose truth. They may use evidence-based therapies like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which challenges unhelpful thought patterns and their resulting behavior. 

Internal family systems (IFS) therapy takes a more creative and engaging approach to identifying generational trauma and equipping your inner Self to heal it. In IFS, generational trauma is identified as an outcast part of yourself that your inner Self can heal. You’ll learn to identify generational trauma and how to realize your innate ability to heal.

Find Help for Trauma

Attending a residential rehab center for trauma can help you take focused time for healing in a safe, non-triggering environment. Browse our list of rehabs that treat trauma to see photos, reviews, insurance information, and more.

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What to Ask a Rehab Center

Calling a rehab center for the first time can feel overwhelming, but it’s an important first step toward getting help.

Knowing what to expect when you get on the phone with a rehab can give you the confidence you need to make that first call. Here’s what to expect—and what to ask—when inquiring at a rehab.

Before you pick up the phone, it’s a good idea to have a list of questions you want to ask. It’ll help you feel prepared, and ensure you’ll get all of the information you need to make a decision about your treatment. 

Rehab Questions: The Basics

How much does treatment cost?

This is the first question on most people’s minds when they call a treatment center. Knowing the costs of treatment upfront allows you to financially prepare for rehab.

In the U.S., most insurance policies cover up to a certain level of treatment. Rehab admissions teams can usually help you find out what your plan will cover. Heather Charlet, Director of Admissions at Gallus Detox Center Colorado, explains that coverage “depends on each individual’s policy and what their out-of-network benefits are. We run a verification of benefits for every patient that has insurance to see what we’re able to cover.”

Use these questions as a starting point: 

  • Do you accept my insurance? 
  • If not, what are my payment options?
  • Is full payment required upfront or can I pay a deposit to hold my spot? 

Read more about how much rehab costs.   

Is there a waitlist?

Most people seeking treatment want help as soon as possible. Because of the large number of treatment centers available, waitlists generally aren’t common in the U.S. But in Europe and Australia have far fewer private rehab options, which may be waitlisted.  

Because addiction is an urgent issue, whether a rehab has a waitlist or not may determine if you can, or want to, receive treatment there. Knowing this right away can save you time. 

gallus detox center coloradoGallus Detox Center in Littleton, Colorado

Tell me more about your treatment approach and therapies.

The path to recovery is highly personal: What works for one person may or may not work for another. That’s why rehabs use so many different methods to treat addiction and mental health disorders. 

Faith-based, 12-Step, non-12-Step, and holistic rehabs are examples of rehab treatment approaches that frame entire programs and may appeal to different types of people. Specific therapies include a range of evidence-based and holistic treatments.

What works best for you depends on your personal framework, past treatment experiences, and addiction or mental health history. Learn what each center offers so you can decide whether their approach resonates with you.

How qualified is your staff?

Knowing who will care for you is just as important as knowing what methods they use. These rehab staff-related questions will help you get a clearer picture of the people guiding your treatment: 

  • What kind of professionals will I be interacting with on a day-to-day basis? 
  • Who will be on my treatment team? 
  • What are their qualifications? 

Rehab Questions: Details of Your Stay

What types of clientele does your program serve? Do you offer specialized services?

These questions are important for several reasons:

  • Some rehab programs are tailored to the needs of certain clientele. There are rehabs that cater to executives and wouldn’t be appropriate for teens, for example.
  • If you identify with ethnic or sexual minority groups, you may require resources to address your minority experiences. For example, a trans person may need an LGBTQ+ affirming environment to safely process trauma. 
  • You may need other specializations for a successful treatment experience, such as co-occurring disorder treatment or trauma-informed care.
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Do you offer on-site detox?

Some people require detox before they begin inpatient treatment. And some residential rehabs are equipped with the facilities and medical staff necessary to offer detox services on-site. Other centers may offer detox off-site through partnerships with local medical facilities. 

An admissions counselor or addiction specialist can help you determine if you need medical detox. 

Detoxing on your own can be harmful to both your physical and mental health. Consult with your doctor or a qualified medical professional when making decisions about detox. 

How many clinical hours does your program include

A key indicator of a rehab center’s value is how many individual therapy sessions you’ll receive per week. The more time you get to spend with your counselors and therapists, the more help you’ll directly receive. Some treatment programs consist mainly of group therapy sessions, while others include more one-on-one time with practitioners. Finding this out upfront can help you avoid unpleasant surprises when you arrive.  

What’s your policy on contact with loved ones? Can I use my laptop or cell phone?

Relationships with your partner, family, and friends are an essential part of your life and recovery. Don’t let fear of not knowing whether you’ll be able to communicate with them be the roadblock that stops you from getting help. 

Ask the center what their device or communications policies are: 

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Questions to Ask a Rehab Facility Before Being Released

Is it possible for me to extend my stay if necessary?

Most inpatient rehab programs have set lengths of stay that range from 30 to 90 days. Still, you never know what’s going to happen and if you’ll feel fully prepared to check out once you’ve reached the benchmark time spent in treatment. While most centers are happy to allow clients to extend their stay, if yours is waitlisted, it’s worth checking in advance. 

What kind of continuing care do you provide?

Most people require ongoing support and care after their stay at a residential rehab. Jan Gerber, CEO of Paracelsus in Zurich, Switzerland, points out: 

“What happens after treatment is probably the most important question about treatment, because that’s what people go back to after they leave from treatment. The whole concept of aftercare is maybe even more important than the treatment itself.” 

Certain components of continuing care, such as ongoing therapy and a strong support network, are essential to relapse prevention. But aftercare options vary greatly between rehab centers. Some centers may not offer continuing care, or may offer these services at an additional cost. So make sure you find out as much information as possible about their aftercare program.

Choosing the Right Rehab Center for You

Wherever you are in the process of seeking help, it’s okay to not have all of the answers. The first phone call to a rehab is a key first step toward getting the help you need. Make the most of your conversation with an admissions advisor so you can make an educated choice about which center is best for your needs.

Browse our list of rehabs to learn more about available treatment options.

Frequently Asked Questions About Calling a Rehab Center

What happens when you call a drug rehab?

An intake specialist will ask a series of questions to learn more about you. This helps them determine the level of care you need and other treatment details. It’s also a chance for you to find out more about the center.

What questions should I ask when choosing a drug rehab?

These questions can help you make the most out of your call:

  • How much does treatment cost? 
  • Is there a waitlist? If so, how long is it? 
  • Tell me about your center’s philosophy and treatment methods.
  • What kind of specialists do you have on staff?
  • Do you offer on-site detox?
  • How many clinical hours does your program include?

Who answers the phone when you call a rehab?

An intake or admissions specialist picks up. Sometimes a receptionist will answer and redirect your call. All rehab staff should follow ethical standards when interacting with potential patients.

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Empathy with Boundaries

Having empathy for people you love, and even those you don’t know, is important to form and maintain deep relationships. Learning healthy empathy and setting boundaries can help keep positive relationships between you and your loved ones.

Dr. Kristen Neff1, an expert in empathy and self-compassion, dives into this topic through her research. She wrote a book called Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself2 about these ideas and created a program called Mindful Self-Compassion to help people live aligned with their goals, motivations, and happiest selves.

Using her research as a basis, you can learn to set boundaries, practice self-compassion, and care for your loved ones and your well-being.

Why Is It Important to Set Boundaries?

Boundaries are the emotional, physical, and mental limits you can establish to maintain your well-being. You can, and should, set boundaries with everyone from your spouse to the stranger on the street. 

By creating boundaries, you can prioritize what’s most important to you by aligning your thoughts and actions with your values. Identifying and communicating your needs can boost your emotional and mental well-being. And knowing your limits can also reduce stress, which can directly improve your physical health3.

Boundaries are not only important for yourself, but also for others. Boundaries foster respect and clear communication, which ensures that you and the other person are comfortable and feel seen, creating a stronger, healthier relationship. 

Balancing Empathy and Boundaries

Empathy allows you to understand and share another person’s feelings. It plays an important role in connecting with others, viewing experiences with a new perspective, and developing a deep understanding of yourself in the process.

Striking the balance between practicing empathy while maintaining personal boundaries can take some refining. It’s great to show empathy to others; however, some people may take advantage of that. Without boundaries, your empathy may overextend to the point of emotional burnout4. You may say “yes” to things you don’t want to, avoid conflict even when it’s necessary, and absorb others’ negative emotions.

Boundaries can provide a resolution. Expressing your feelings, acting on your values, and listening to your body are all ways to practice self-respect. Supporting others begins with supporting yourself.

Kristin Neff’s Approach to Balancing Empathy, Self-Compassion, and Boundaries

Dr. Neff’s work centers around the concept of self-compassion, which is treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. The 3 elements of self-compassion5 include 

  1. Being kind to yourself rather than judging, even if you make a mistake
  2. Recognizing that it’s part of the human experience to go through difficult times
  3. Practicing mindfulness in how your thoughts, feelings, and actions may positively or negatively impact your well-being

Utilizing this concept, Dr. Neff believes that prioritizing your mental, physical, and emotional health is essential to provide empathy and help to others. In fact, Kristen Neff’s research proved that when practicing self-compassion, you can be in a better position to help someone else6. When you are in a stable, happy state, you may be better at supporting loved ones. 

Setting boundaries can prioritize and protect your well-being. You can learn ways to recognize what your boundaries are, how to communicate them, and how to practice them, so you can be the best you can be for the other person and yourself.  

Strategies for Implementing Empathy with Boundaries

You can practice these techniques to honor your well-being and boundaries:

  1. Identify how much time, energy, and emotional support you can offer without compromising your mental health. This will set the basis for your boundaries. 
  2. Clearly communicate your boundaries to your loved ones. Describe ways that you will be able to show up for them. You may say,
    1. “I want to support you, but this is a difficult topic for me to talk about right now. Can we revisit it when I’m in a better headspace?”
    2. “I have a lot on my plate right now and need to focus on work. I won’t be available for social plans until the weekend. I hope you understand.”
  3. Practicing mindfulness7 can help you navigate others’ emotional responses. You’ll learn to be present with others’ emotions, while still honoring your own to avoid being overwhelmed.
  4. Keep some emotional distance. You can recognize and understand others’ feelings without absorbing them by realizing their emotions are their responsibility.
  5. Practice saying no when necessary. Establish clear limits on what you can take on, and recognize when additional commitments might hurt your well-being.

How Empathy with Healthy Boundaries can Change Your Life

Implementing boundaries can transform your relationships with loved ones and yourself. In addition to emotional health, you may foster greater resilience by staying true to your boundaries. Communicating your boundaries can hone your communication skills and help you be more open with others. And you may develop healthier, more authentic relationships. 

Find Additional Resources

You can browse Kristen Neff’s self-compassion exercises8 to see how self-kindness is the first step towards setting your boundaries. 

If you’re looking to learn more about how you can support yourself, or how you can care for others in need, visit our resource library.

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25 Recovery Quotes for the Christmas Season

Although addiction has no yearly time frame, the holidays can be a hard time for people with an addiction, those in recovery from substance use disorders, and their loved ones. Staying aware of recovery-related topics can help ensure that each family member or friend feels comfortable to celebrate. Discover recovery words of wisdom to inspire you this holiday season.

Recovery Quotes

Quote #1 

“Forgiving yourself, believing in yourself, and choosing to love yourself are the best gifts one could receive.” ― Brittany Burgunder

Quote #2 

“I am not defined by my relapses, but in my decision to remain in recovery despite them.” ― Anonymous 

Quote #3 

“Believe you can, and you’re halfway there.” ― Theodore Roosevelt

Quote #4

“Be stronger than your strongest excuse. Be greater than your most negative voice.”

― Alan Maiccon

Quote #5

“The best way to predict your future is to create it.” ― Abraham Lincoln

Quote #6

“It’s the days you have every right to break down and fall apart, yet choosing to show up anyway is what matters most. Don’t diminish the small steps that others can’t see.” ― Brittany Burgunder

Quote #7

“I am a great believer in luck, and I find that the harder I work the more luck I have.” ― Thomas Jefferson 

Quote #8

“Courage isn’t having the strength to go on―it is going on when you don’t have strength.” ― Napoléon Bonaparte

Quote #9

“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” ― Confucius

Quote #10

“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” ― J.K. Rowling

Quote #11

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Quote #12

“One of the hardest things was learning that I was worth recovery.” ― Demi Lovato

Quote #13

“Change your thoughts, change your life.” ― Lao Tzu

Quote #14

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.” ― Robert Louis Stevenson

Quote #15

”At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s keeping you together. ” ― Anonymous

Quote #16

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.” ― Mark Twain

Quote #17

“Recovery is hard. Regret is harder.” ― Brittany Burgunder

Quote #18

“Every worthy act is difficult. Ascent is always difficult. Descent is easy and often slippery.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

Quote #19

“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” ― Alice Walker

Quote #20

“Don’t let the past steal your present.” ― Terri Guillemets

Quote #21

“Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.” ― C.S. Lewis

Quote #22

“Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.” ― Charlotte Whitton

Quote #23

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” ― Lao Tzu

Quote #24

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” ― Albert Einstein

Quote #25

“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.” ― Henry Ford

Recover in Love

Whether it’s the holiday season or not, you can always prioritize healing. Discover the best version of yourself by exploring and connecting with rehabs near you.

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How to Help Someone with Schizophrenia: Strategies for Care

Schizophrenia is almost always a severe and disabling mental health disorder. Managing this condition is usually a lifelong process; however, with the right care and professional treatment, it is possible to live a healthy and fulfilling life with this disorder. 

If you know someone navigating this condition, you can offer support during this crucial time by helping them find professional treatment for schizophrenia.

Understanding Schizophrenia

Schizophrenia is a psychiatric condition that is characterized by a disruption in thought patterns, sensory perception, reactions to emotions, and connections with others.  Symptoms of this disorder usually appear during late adolescence or early adulthood, with the most common symptoms being hallucinations, delusions, and disordered thinking. These symptoms can have a major influence on every area of a person’s life.

Schizophrenia’s long-term effects can vary depending on factors such as your loved one’s treatment plan, medication management, when they started treatment, and overall health. Some common long-term effects of schizophrenia include: 

  • Reduced emotional expression
  • Less motivation to accomplish goals
  • Difficulty with social relationships
  • Motor and cognitive impairment

Myths about Schizophrenia

While this disorder can be complicated, there are a few things that schizophrenia is not. 

Myth #1: People with schizophrenia are violent and dangerous. Inherently, people with schizophrenia are not violent. They are actually 14 times more likely to be victimized compared to being the perpetrator.

Myth #2: Schizophrenia is directly caused by a bad childhood or a traumatic event. Schizophrenia is believed to be caused by a combination of genetic, environmental, and neurological factors. It’s a complex interplay of various factors. Parenting style or a single traumatic event does not cause schizophrenia. 

Myth #3: Schizophrenia is untreatable. While there is no cure for schizophrenia, it is a treatable condition. Antipsychotic medications, therapy, and psychosocial interventions can help manage this condition.

Myth #4: People with schizophrenia can’t work or lead meaningful lives. With proper treatment, support, and management, many people with schizophrenia can have fulfilling lives, maintain jobs, and have meaningful relationships. 

Educating Yourself

Schizophrenia is a very complex condition. The more you know about the disorder, and what your loved one is going through, the better equipped you both are to navigate it.

Doing your own research and talking to a medical professional who’s knowledgeable about schizophrenia ensures that you have a well-rounded understanding of the disorder. Reading up on the condition can provide you with a basic understanding of the symptoms, treatments, and potential risks associated with the illness. And speaking with a doctor can provide you with personalized insights and information. Doing both of these can ensure that you are as informed as possible.

Professional Help for Schizophrenia

In all cases, people with schizophrenia need professional help. And the earlier they get treatment, the better chance they have to live a fulfilling life. You can help them find appropriate resources, make appointments, or go with them to appointments if they are okay with that. 

Contact a mental health professional, like a psychiatrist, psychologist, or therapist, to develop a treatment plan. If you are having trouble finding an available professional, go to your primary care physician first. They will be able to refer you to the appropriate person. 

From here, incorporating therapy into their routine will be key. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), family therapy, and social and life skills training can help your loved one learn coping strategies, manage symptoms, and improve social skills. They’ll learn new ways of thinking about and managing their hallucinations and delusions.

Medication Management

Medication management is a cornerstone to treating schizophrenia. Your loved one will be prescribed antipsychotic medication. There are 2 groups of antipsychotics—first-generation, or “typical,” and second-generation, or “atypical.” These both affect the dopamine receptors in the brain, and second-generation also affect the serotonin receptors. Talk to your doctor to see which medication is right for their needs. They may also need prescriptions to manage co-occurring disorders, like substance use or depression. 

Combining medication with therapeutic interventions can be very effective in keeping symptoms under control and providing a more fulfilling life. Your doctor should regularly check in to ensure that the medication is working properly and monitor for any potential side effects. If you notice the medications have adverse side effects, or making schizophrenia symptoms worse, seek help from a medical professional right away. 

Navigating Crisis Situations

When someone with schizophrenia is in crisis, it’s crucial to recognize the warning signs to ensure their safety and well-being. Schizophrenia is a severe mental illness that could result in the person harming themselves or someone else. Seek professional help promptly if you see your loved one experiencing these signs:

  • Symptoms suddenly get worse
  • Social withdrawal
  • Intense paranoia
  • Resistance to treatment or medications
  • Decline in personal hygiene

If you believe the person is in immediate danger, do not leave them alone. Try to keep them in a safe, controlled environment. With a professional, develop a crisis management plan that outlines steps they can take when they experience elevated hallucinations or delusions. Include emergency contacts, coping strategies, and resources they can turn to for support.

Your Role in Their Recovery

Supporting someone with schizophrenia requires patience, understanding, and a compassionate approach. Your loved one will likely need some guidance, at least in the beginning of their recovery journey. But with your help, they can live a full, rewarding life.

Supporting Daily Living

A key element of your loved one’s treatment plan will be creating a structured routine. Help them build a daily schedule that includes regular meal times, medication management, and designated relaxation or leisure activities. Encourage healthy habits, such as proper nutrition and exercise. Offer to join them in this healthy lifestyle to keep them motivated. 

You can also help them maintain connections with friends, family, and support groups. Social activities can keep them from isolating and the negative effects that has on their mood.

Run through their crisis management plan regularly. Be sure that they have all the tools and skills to successfully navigate difficult symptoms, especially if you’re not there to support them in the moment.

Managing Symptoms and Challenges

Outside of therapy and medication, your loved one will also learn and practice coping skills for their symptoms. They should primarily be aware of the places, people, and things that trigger their hallucinations or delusions. They can, at first, avoid these stimuli and later work through their triggering effects. If symptoms do arise, they can manage them in a few ways:

  • Reality Testing: They can remind themselves that the hallucination is not real. Challenge the experience by asking, “Is there any evidence that supports this?”
  • Distraction: Reading, drawing, or doing puzzles, helps shift focus away from hallucinations.
  • Grounding Techniques: Your loved one can describe what they see, touch, hear, smell, and taste to help ground themselves in reality.
  • Positive Self-Talk: They can repeat affirmations or calming statements to counteract hallucinations’ negative or distressing messages.

While you can be an anchor during hard moments, make sure your loved one has consistent help and direct contact with a professional.

Patience and Empathy

Talking to someone with schizophrenia allows you to show empathy, patience, and understanding. Ask them how they feel or what they’re experiencing to show that you genuinely care and want to listen. Ensure they know you’re there for them and that they don’t have to go through this alone. And celebrate small achievements along the way because recovery is more fun when you give yourself credit for all the work you’re putting in. 

Their progress might be gradual, so show your loved one, and yourself, compassion. Be sure to prioritize your own well-being. While this process can be rewarding, taking time for yourself is important. Lean on friends and family for support.
There is hope for the person in your life who has schizophrenia. With a little guidance, and professional schizophrenia treatment, they can unlock the door to a fulfilling life.