Tag: Mental Health

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How to Stop Suicidal Thoughts: Find Support for You or a Loved One

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, or unsure how to keep going, please hear this: what you’re feeling is real—and your life deeply matters. 

Suicidal thoughts can feel isolating and unbearable, but there is help and there is hope. 

Whether you’ve struggled in silence for a long time or these feelings are new and frightening, reaching out for support can be the first step toward relief. Reaching out for help, talking to a mental health professional,1 or connecting with a support network2 can make a critical difference.

Illustration of a person sitting on the floor with knees drawn to chest, looking toward a doorway with light streaming in, accompanied by the message:

In your clinical experience, what are the most effective ways to support someone in the midst of a suicidal crisis—and how can everyday people offer meaningful help?

To support someone in a suicidal crisis, it’s most important to help them stay safe and to stay connected. Ask them how they’re feeling, listen to them nonjudgmentally, and talk about their suicidal thoughts openly and clearly. If the person wants professional support, offer to help them call 988, text ‘HOME’ to 741741, or get to the closest crisis center or emergency room. Otherwise, offer to support them in other ways that you feel comfortable—staying with them, going on a walk or watching TV together, connecting them with other loved ones, helping them complete an errand or get something to eat, or continuing to talk about what’s going on—and then follow-up with a caring text, call, or check-in later.

Kiki Fehling, PhD, DBT-LBC

Meeting Yourself Where You Are

When experiencing suicidal thoughts, even basic self-care can feel overwhelming. Instead of setting expectations to immediately build a support network, acknowledge where you are right now. Getting through the next hour, or even the next five minutes, is a valid goal. You can meet yourself where you are with grace and acceptance.

Infographic titled “Factors That Increase Risk of Suicide” featuring icons and phrases such as mental health conditions, substance use or withdrawal, chronic pain or illness, isolation, trauma, recent loss, financial stress, discrimination, access to lethal means, and family history. On the right, a person is shown hunched over, burdened by overlapping warning signs.

Why Do I Feel Suicidal?

Suicidal feelings often arise from a mix of emotional, psychological, and environmental factors, including:

  • Mental health conditions3 like depression, bipolar disorder, or anxiety
  • Chronic health problems4 or physical pain
  • Substance use or withdrawal
  • Isolation, shame, trauma, or identity-based discrimination

Why Suicide Can Seem Like the Only Option

During a mental health crisis, your ability to think clearly or see alternatives may become impaired. Thoughts of suicide can feel like the only escape from emotional pain, but there are other ways to find relief. 

Depression, trauma, or overwhelming stress can cloud your judgment and make it difficult to see beyond your current suffering. This cognitive distortion, where everything feels permanent and hopeless, is a hallmark of suicidal thinking. In these moments, the brain’s ability to process options narrows, making death seem like the only way out. 

But suicidal thoughts are symptoms, not truths. With the right support, your perspective can shift, and you can begin to see other ways to reduce pain and reclaim your life.

Infographic titled “5 Steps to Help Someone Struggling With Suicidal Thoughts” featuring five action steps: 1) Directly ask, 2) Keep them safe, 3) Be there for them, 4) Help them connect, and 5) Stay connected. Each step includes a tip and supportive example statement. Visual includes symbolic icons and reaching hands.

A Suicidal Crisis Is Almost Always Temporary

Strong suicidal urges often peak and fade. Many people who survive an attempted suicide later report feeling grateful they did not end their lives. Crisis support can help you move through this moment safely.

Intense emotional pain can convince you that it will last forever, but it won’t. Research shows that suicidal thoughts often rise sharply and then fade,5 much like a wave cresting before it recedes. 

Many people who survive suicide attempts report that they felt differently within minutes, hours, or days. They often express deep relief and gratitude for surviving. If you can ride out the storm—even for a few minutes—it opens the door for healing. Reaching out for help, calling a crisis line, or talking to someone you trust can be the first step toward making it through this moment alive and supported.

Even Problems That Seem Hopeless Have Solutions

You may not see it now, but solutions exist—even if they don’t feel immediately accessible. Talk therapy and peer support6 can help uncover new ways of coping.

When you’re overwhelmed, it can feel like your problems are too big or too complex to fix. But even the most painful circumstances like abuse, loss, shame, financial strain, or addiction, can improve with time, care, and support. 

Therapies like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) have helped countless people develop tools to manage emotions and rebuild their lives. Peer support groups, faith-based communities, and crisis counselors can also offer perspective and encouragement. You don’t have to solve everything alone, and you don’t have to do it all at once. Small steps can lead to profound change.

If You’re Feeling Suicidal, Take These Immediate Actions

If you are in immediate danger, please call 988 or visit the nearest emergency room. You can also reach out to:

Small steps can interrupt harmful patterns. Try grounding techniques, journaling, or connecting with someone you trust.

When the urge to self-harm feels strong, commit to waiting—even for just 24 hours. This pause gives you time to access coping strategies and reconnect with support systems.

Suicide Crisis Lines Worldwide

Plan Ahead and Create a Suicide Prevention Plan

When you’re struggling with suicidal thoughts—or supporting someone who is—it can be difficult to see a way forward. But creating a suicide prevention plan offers a proactive, lifesaving path through crisis. By identifying support systems, warning signs, and personalized coping tools ahead of time, you can regain a sense of control and safety. The following strategies combine professional care, community support, and daily wellness practices to help prevent suicidal ideation and promote long-term mental health.

  • Preventing Suicidal Ideation: Preventing suicidal ideation involves several approaches that address mental health, social connections, and lifestyle factors. Here are some evidence-based strategies:
  • Seek Professional Help: Mental health professionals can provide proper diagnosis and treatment for conditions that may contribute to suicidal thoughts, such as depression, anxiety disorders, bipolar disorder, and substance use disorders. This can include therapy, medication, or a combination of both.
  • Build a Support Network:9 Maintain regular contact with supportive friends, family members, or support groups who can provide emotional support during difficult times. Having people to talk to openly about feelings can reduce isolation.
  • Develop Healthy Coping Skills: Learning healthy ways to manage stress and emotional pain is crucial. This might include mindfulness meditation, deep breathing exercises, physical activity, journaling, or engaging in creative outlets like art or music.
  • Create a Safety Plan:10 Having a written plan that outlines warning signs, coping strategies, people to contact for help, and ways to make your environment safe can be invaluable during a crisis. This plan should be easily accessible.
  • Limit Access to Means: Reducing access11 to potentially lethal means, such as firearms or large quantities of medication, is an important preventive measure.
  • Address Substance Use: Alcohol and drugs can worsen suicidal thoughts and impair judgment. Getting help for substance use issues can reduce suicide risk.
  • Maintain Physical Health: Regular exercise, adequate sleep, and proper nutrition can positively impact mental health and reduce symptoms that may contribute to suicidal thoughts.

How to Help Someone Who is Suicidal

Experiencing suicidal thoughts or watching a loved one struggle with suicidal feelings can be frightening and overwhelming. It’s important to know that suicidal ideation is often a symptom of underlying mental illness or emotional distress, and help is available. 

If someone is showing warning signs such as talking about ending their own life, withdrawing from others, or engaging in self-harm, they may be at immediate risk and need urgent care.

  • Encourage them to connect with a mental health professional or call a crisis line like the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline can be life-saving. Trained counselors can provide compassionate, non-judgmental support and guide them through mental health crisis situations.
  • Offer alternatives like creating a safety plan, joining a support group, or just being part of their support network can reduce their risk of suicide. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, asking direct questions like “Are you thinking about hurting yourself?” shows concern and does not increase the chance of a suicide attempt—instead, it opens the door for support. 

Continued follow-up after a crisis and access to affordable mental health care are essential, especially for those affected by substance abuse or facing barriers to mental health services. Whether you’re a family member, a friend, or a peer, knowing how to help someone by recognizing the signs and connecting them to professional help like Samaritans or 988 can truly make a difference.

No matter how dark things feel right now, this moment does not define your future. 

What do you wish more people understood about the nature of suicidal thoughts, and how can early intervention or mental health literacy reduce stigma and save lives?

As a multi-attempt survivor, I have lived with stigma surrounding suicide my entire life and was always told how it is a ‘sin’ or ‘selfish’ just to have those thoughts. Working in mental health has shown me time and time again how common suicidal ideation is, and how individuals should have the ability to openly talk about and receive care and compassion in response.

When we talk about early intervention, we need to address how the discussion surrounding suicide needs to change, and entire communities need access to resources, such as NAMI, that provide education on suicide & prevention. The more we fight the idea that suicide and suicidal ideation are ‘taboo’ topics, the more we are removing shame and opening the conversation, which will save lives.

Sage Nestler, MSW | Releasing the Phoenix

It’s okay if reaching out feels impossible right now. When you’re in that kind of pain, asking for help can take more strength than most people will ever understand. Suicidal thoughts can cloud your sense of hope, making it feel like there’s no way out. But, it is important to remember that these thoughts are not permanent. You don’t have to face them alone. 

Whether it’s calling a crisis line, confiding in a trusted friend, or simply making it through one more day, every small step is a powerful act of survival. You deserve support. You deserve healing.

There are people who care about you, who want to help you, and who believe in your worth—especially when you’re struggling to see it yourself. Treatment is available that meets you where you are, without judgment or pressure.

FAQs

Q: What should I do if someone I know is suicidal?


A: If someone is expressing thoughts of suicide, stay with them and help them feel heard. Encourage them to contact a crisis counselor or call/text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If they are in immediate danger, do not leave them alone—call 911 or take them to the nearest emergency room.

Q: What are the 5 action steps for helping someone in emotional pain?


A: According to the National Institute of Mental Health, the five steps are:

  1. Ask
  2. Keep them safe
  3. Be there
  4. Help them connect
  5. Stay connected

These steps can reduce the risk of suicide and make a critical difference in someone’s recovery.

Q: What not to say to someone who is suicidal?

A: Avoid saying things that minimize their pain like “just snap out of it” or “you have so much to live for.” These statements can feel invalidating. Instead, listen without judgment and direct them toward mental health support.

Q: How to deal with a loved one being suicidal?


A: Support them with empathy and without panic. Help them develop a safety plan, remove access to means of self-harm, and stay in close contact. Encourage them to seek professional care, such as talk therapy or outpatient services.

Q: Why does someone have suicidal thoughts?


A: Suicidal thoughts often stem from complex interactions between mental illness, trauma, substance use, physical pain, or intense emotional distress. Life stressors like relationship breakdowns or discrimination can worsen these feelings, especially in marginalized groups like the LGBTQ+ community.

Q: What is suicidal ideation?


A: Suicidal ideation refers to thoughts about or planning suicide. These thoughts can range from passive (“I wish I weren’t here”) to active (“I want to end my life”). Ideation doesn’t always lead to action but should always be taken seriously.

Q: How can I know if they’re in immediate danger?


A: Immediate danger signs include talking about wanting to die, having a plan, giving away possessions, or withdrawing suddenly. According to the 988 Lifeline, any mention of intent or means to attempt suicide requires urgent intervention.

Q: Who is most at risk of suicide?


A: High-risk groups include people with untreated mental health conditions, individuals with a history of trauma or abuse, those with access to lethal means, and members of marginalized communities. LGBTQ+ youth, veterans, and those with chronic illnesses or a history of substance use are especially vulnerable.

Q: Is there a link between self-harm and suicide?


A: Yes. While not all self-harm leads to suicide, individuals who engage in self-injury are at a higher risk of suicidal behavior. Both are serious signs of emotional distress and require compassionate intervention.

Q: What are warning signs for suicide?


A: Warning signs include increased substance abuse, feelings of hopelessness, social withdrawal, changes in sleep or eating, and expressing a desire to die. The CDC provides a comprehensive overview of behavioral risk indicators.

Q: How can I support a friend who is feeling suicidal?


A: Be present, listen nonjudgmentally, and offer to help them access a helpline or mental health professional. Encourage connection to a support group or peer support community. Just knowing someone cares can be powerful.

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Saad’s 7 Steps to Starting Your Mental Health and Wellness Recovery Journey

Saad’s powerful story of overcoming significant health challenges and transforming his life offers a beacon of hope for anyone facing similar struggles. His journey, marked by weight gain, injury, mental health issues, and job loss, led him to a profound realization: recovery is possible through a combination of inner faith, practical action, and a shift in perspective.

Saad vividly recalls his lowest point: “I completely hit the rock bottom…I started hating my body the way I looked. I hid behind those baggy clothes, always trying to cover your area of your, you know, belly avoiding mirrors. Fear of confrontation of your to yourself had very low self-esteem.” This feeling of despair and self-loathing is a common experience for many who find themselves struggling with their physical and mental well-being. However, Saad’s story underscores that this “rock bottom” can also be the catalyst for profound change.

1. Shift Your Mindset and Perspective

Saad emphasizes the crucial role of changing his mentality. He realized that his previous approach of self-punishment through extreme diets was unsustainable. Instead, he focused on understanding his body’s needs and cues. This shift in perspective is fundamental to long-term recovery. Instead of viewing lifestyle changes as restrictive punishments, consider them acts of self-care and investment in your well-being. Recognize that recovery isn’t about perfection, but about progress with self-compassion.

2. Take Practical, Sustainable Actions

Saad didn’t just rely on a change in mindset; he took concrete steps to improve various aspects of his life. He focused on nutrition, sleep, emotional health, exercise, movement, and mobility – all factors that contribute to functional metabolism and long-term health. This holistic approach is vital. Recovery isn’t just about addressing one symptom; it’s about nurturing your overall well-being through consistent, sustainable habits. Consider incorporating small, manageable changes into your daily routine, such as a short walk, a healthier meal, or a few minutes of mindfulness.

3. Listen to Your Body’s Cues

One of Saad’s key learnings was the importance of listening to his body. He moved away from rigid rules about “good” and “bad” foods and instead focused on mindful eating and understanding his body’s signals of hunger and fullness. Developing this awareness is crucial for sustainable health and well-being. Pay attention to how different foods make you feel, notice when you feel truly rested, and acknowledge any discomfort or pain signals your body might be sending.

4. Find Your “Why” and Cultivate Purpose

Saad found motivation in wanting to help his family and others. Helping his mother reverse her type 2 diabetes fueled his passion and provided a strong sense of purpose. Having a clear “why” can be a powerful driving force in your recovery journey. What motivates you to change? Is it your health, your relationships, your aspirations? Connecting with this purpose can provide the resilience needed to navigate challenges.

5. Embrace Learning and Seek Knowledge

Saad’s journey involved extensive learning about functional metabolism, clinical research, and health and wellness coaching. While you don’t need to become a certified expert, actively seeking knowledge about mental health, nutrition, and well-being can empower you to make informed decisions about your recovery. Explore Recovery.com’s Resource Library to gain a better understanding of your challenges and potential solutions.

6. Understand That Shame and Isolation Are Harmful

Saad’s powerful statement, “shame and isolation are more harmful than food,” highlights the detrimental impact of negative self-talk and social withdrawal. Shame can erode self-esteem and hinder progress, while isolation deprives you of crucial social support. Be kind to yourself, practice self-compassion, and actively seek connection with supportive individuals. Consider exploring support groups or therapy as avenues for reducing isolation and processing difficult emotions. Recovery.com can help you find treatment centers and support networks.

7. Ask for Help and Break Free from Ego

Saad emphasizes the importance of asking for help when needed. “No matter how far gone you feel, there is always a solution out there. You just have to ask for help when you need to ask. Do ask. Don’t get that ego in the middle. Don’t hold yourself back.” Overcoming the fear of vulnerability and reaching out to trusted individuals, professionals, or support systems is a sign of strength, not weakness. Just as Saad sought guidance, allow yourself to lean on others during your journey.

Saad’s journey is a testament to the power of resilience and the possibility of profound transformation. He reminds us that “you are not broken, just a bit overwhelmed by the situation and the circumstances.” By starting small, taking practical steps, listening to your body, finding your purpose, seeking knowledge, combating shame and isolation, and asking for help, you too can embark on a meaningful and sustainable recovery journey. Remember, as Saad wisely advises, “just start. You’ll be amazed by the capacities your body’s built in. You’ll be amazed on how your mind is capable of what extent it can go to achieve something.”

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Sensory Overload ADHD: Understand Triggers and Learn Coping Strategies

Imagine walking into a bustling café—the chatter of conversations, the clinking of dishes, and the aroma of freshly brewed coffee all collide in a sensory whirlwind. For individuals with ADHD, this scene can quickly escalate into an overwhelming experience known as sensory overload.

This phenomenon not only makes everyday environments feel chaotic but can also hinder focus and emotional well-being. As we delve into the intricate world of sensory overload in ADHD, we’ll explore how it affects people’s lives and uncover effective strategies to navigate this sensory storm.

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What is ADHD?

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental mental health disorder characterized by persistent patterns of inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity that interfere with functioning or development. According to the DSM-5-TR (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition, Text Revision),1 the traditional signs and symptoms of ADHD are categorized into two main groups: inattention and hyperactivity-impulsivity.

Symptoms of inattention may include difficulty sustaining attention, frequent careless mistakes in schoolwork or other activities, difficulty organizing tasks, avoidance of tasks that require sustained mental effort, and forgetfulness in daily activities. Symptoms of hyperactivity-impulsivity may include fidgeting, difficulty remaining seated, excessive talking, interrupting others, and acting without thinking.

To receive a diagnosis, these symptoms must be present for a minimum of six (6) months and must be evident in more than one setting, such as at home and school. Understanding ADHD is essential for providing effective support and interventions for those affected by it.

The ADHD Brain

The ADHD brain exhibits distinct neurobiological differences that influence attention,2 impulse control, and emotional regulation. Neuroimaging studies have shown that individuals with ADHD often demonstrate variations in brain structure and function compared to neurotypical individuals.

Key areas affected include the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for executive functions such as decision-making and impulse control; the basal ganglia, which play a role in regulating movement and attention; and the cerebellum, which is involved in coordination and the processing of sensory information. Research shows that individuals with ADHD may have decreased dopamine levels in these regions, which can contribute to difficulties in motivation, focus, and reward processing.

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Differences Depending on Age

In children, ADHD symptoms may present as hyperactivity and impulsivity,3 which are often more pronounced due to the ongoing neurodevelopmental processes in their brains. As children transition into adolescence, there may be a shift in symptoms, with increased challenges in attention and emotional regulation.

Neurological growth spurts during adolescence can lead to further changes in brain connectivity and working memory capabilities, marking a period where individuals with ADHD may face heightened emotional responses and social pressures.

In adults, the manifestation of ADHD4 often changes again, with hyperactive symptoms typically diminishing but challenges in attention, organization, and emotional self-regulation becoming more prominent. The adult ADHD brain may demonstrate adaptive behaviors developed over time, but individuals may still experience residual symptoms that impact daily functioning and quality of life.

How have you professionally supported someone with ADHD experiencing sensory overload, and what strategies proved most effective?

When it comes to supporting someone with ADHD and sensory overload, the first thing I always focus on is understanding their sensory profile, for which I use an evidence-based assessment. It’s really important to get a formal assessment, if possible, in order to pinpoint exactly what types of stimuli and environments are overwhelming for that specific person. Some of the most effective strategies I’ve used include having clients carry a grounding pack—something small they can keep on them filled with sensory tools that help them regulate in the moment, like fidget items, calming scents, or textured objects.

I also work with them to figure out which environments are most overwhelming, and we make a plan, like using noise-canceling headphones or Loop earplugs if auditory input is a trigger. Another helpful strategy is modifying how or when tasks are done. Simple changes can make a huge difference in avoiding overload and keeping energy steady throughout the day. At the end of the day, it’s really about listening to what their body is telling them and building in supports that work with their nervous system, not against it.

Sarah Anderson, OTD, OTR/L | Elevated Wellbeing OT

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What is Sensory Overload?

Sensory overload or overstimulation in the context of ADHD occurs when an individual experiences an overwhelming amount of sensory input5—whether from sights, sounds, textures, or even strong smells like perfumes—making it difficult to concentrate or cope with the environment. [4] For those with ADHD, heightened sensitivity to sensory stimuli can lead to feelings of anxiety, irritability, and fatigue.

Here’s a closer look at some common symptoms of sensory overload, along with relatable examples:

  • Inability to Focus: Struggling to concentrate on a conversation at a party because of the loud music and chatter surrounding you.
  • Feeling Overwhelmed: Walking into a busy shopping mall and feeling anxious or drained due to the bright lights and multiple noises happening at once.
  • Irritability: Becoming easily frustrated or upset when trying to work in a noisy café, where the sounds make it hard to think.
  • Physical Discomfort: Becoming irritated by the tags on your clothing or the texture of certain fabrics, leading you to rip off your shirt in discomfort.
  • Panic or Anxiety Attacks: Experiencing a sudden rush of panic when in a crowded space, causing you to feel trapped and needing to escape.
  • Processing Challenges: Having trouble following a lecture because your mind is racing from the sounds and movements around you.
  • Avoidance Behavior: Choosing to stay at home instead of attending social events because you fear being overwhelmed by the environment.

Recognizing these symptoms can help individuals with ADHD, as well as their friends and family, develop effective coping strategies and create more supportive environments. Understanding sensory overload is key to managing it effectively and improving overall well-being.

Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD)

Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD)6 refers to a condition where the brain has difficulty receiving and responding to sensory information from the environment. Individuals with SPD may overreact, underreact, or have unusual responses to sensory stimuli, such as sounds, flashing lights, textures, or tastes. This is called sensory over-responsivity. This can lead to challenges in daily activities, social interactions, and emotional regulation.

SPD can occur independently or alongside other conditions, such as ADHD or autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Treatment often involves occupational therapy, which focuses on improving sensory integration and coping strategies to enhance daily functioning and quality of life.

What Leads to Sensory Overload?

Sensory overload in individuals with ADHD can be attributed to several causes, many of which relate to the way their brains process sensory information. Here are some key factors, explained in an accessible way:

  • Increased Hypersensitivity: People with ADHD often have a heightened sensory sensitivity7 to sensory input, meaning their brains are more reactive to stimuli like sounds, lights, and textures. For example, while a typical busy environment might feel just lively to some, an individual with ADHD may perceive it as chaotic and overwhelming, leading to discomfort and difficulty focusing.
  • Difficulties with Filtering Information: The brain’s ability to filter out irrelevant sensory information is less efficient in those with ADHD. This means they may struggle to tune out background noise or visual distractions. Imagine trying to watch a movie while someone is talking loudly in the background. For someone with ADHD, the distractions can be hard to ignore, making it difficult to concentrate on the movie.
  • Imbalances in Neurotransmitters: Neurotransmitters are chemicals in the brain that help transmit signals between nerve cells. In individuals with ADHD, there can be imbalances,8 particularly with dopamine and norepinephrine, which play roles in attention and arousal. When the brain struggles to manage these chemicals effectively, it can lead to a state of sensory overload, as the individual may react more strongly to stimuli that would typically be manageable.
  • Co-Existing Conditions: Many individuals with ADHD also experience other conditions, such as anxiety or sensory processing disorder. These co-occurring conditions can exacerbate sensory overload symptoms. For instance, someone with both ADHD and anxiety9 might feel even more overwhelmed in bustling environments, as their anxiety amplifies their reaction to sensory inputs.
  • Environmental Factors: The environments in which individuals with ADHD find themselves can significantly affect sensory overload. Bright lights, loud noises, or crowded spaces can trigger an intense sensory reaction. Think about a busy supermarket on a Saturday afternoon; the combination of bright lights, loud announcements, and crowded aisles can create a sensory overload experience for someone with ADHD.

By understanding these causes, we can better support individuals with ADHD in managing sensory overload and creating environments that are more accommodating to their needs.

The Sensory Overload Experience for Those with Higher Functioning ADHD

High-functioning ADHD often presents differently than traditional forms of the disorder, with individuals able to maintain various levels of functionality in their daily lives. However, they still experience symptoms that can impact their social, academic, and professional functioning and may benefit from medical advice or treatment.

Here are some common symptoms of high-functioning ADHD, along with relatable examples:

  • Chronic Disorganization: Frequently misplacing items (like keys or important documents) and struggling to maintain an organized workspace or living area, leading to frustration in daily routines.
  • Procrastination: Putting off important tasks until the last minute, causing stress and a rush to complete work that could have been managed more smoothly over time.
  • Difficulty Focusing on Tasks: Starting a project enthusiastically but becoming easily distracted by background noises or even by the urge to check social media, preventing completion of the task.
  • Impulsivity in Social Situations: Interrupting friends during conversations or blurting out thoughts without considering the social context, which can lead to misunderstandings.
  • Emotional Dysregulation: Experiencing intense emotional reactions, such as anger or sadness, over relatively minor issues, which may be perplexing to friends or family.
  • Restlessness: Feeling the need to constantly move or fidget, even in situations where it’s not appropriate to do so, like tapping a foot during a meeting or shifting in a chair.
  • Difficulty Following Through on Commitments: Agreeing to help a friend but forgetting about the commitment, leading to guilt and potential strain in the friendship.
  • Hyperfocus: Becoming so engrossed in a hobby or a special interest that hours can pass unnoticed, resulting in missed obligations or deadlines.
  • Sensitivity to Feedback: Taking constructive criticism very personally, leading to feelings of inadequacy or frustration, even when the feedback is meant to be helpful.

Understanding these symptoms can help individuals with high-functioning ADHD identify and address their challenges more effectively, leading to improved self-awareness and strategies for managing their daily lives.

What are some of the most overlooked environmental or emotional triggers that contribute to sensory overload in adults with ADHD?

One of the most common, yet often overlooked, environmental triggers that I see with all of my clients, not just adults with ADHD, is the negative impact of constant notifications, alerts, and interruptions. In order to produce quality work and get into a flow state, people need to be able to maintain focused attention. To help achieve this, I recommend that clients turn off notifications–even just visual notifications–close computer windows, and, when necessary, use apps to limit/block phone and website use. Having uninterrupted time to work and think not only helps with productivity, but it also helps reduce stress and feelings of overwhelm.

Tricia Johnson, LCSW

Dual Diagnosis: ADHD and Substance Use Disorders

Sensory overload can be particularly challenging for individuals who are dually diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and a substance use or alcohol use disorder. The interplay between these conditions can exacerbate the experience of sensory overload and create a complex set of challenges.

Here’s how this phenomenon affects individuals with such dual diagnoses:

  • Increased Sensitivity to Stimuli: Individuals with ADHD often exhibit heightened sensitivity to sensory stimuli.10 This can be intensified when coupled with a substance use disorder, as substances may alter sensory perception, making environments feel more chaotic or overwhelming. For example, someone in recovery from alcohol use disorder might find bright lights, loud noises, or other sensory triggers, particularly jarring, leading to feelings of anxiety or distress.
  • Impaired Coping Mechanisms: Substance use may initially provide the individual with a way to escape from overwhelming sensory experiences. However, over time, reliance on substances can hinder the development of effective coping strategies. When not using substances, the individual may struggle to handle sensory input due to a lack of established coping mechanisms.
  • Emotional Dysregulation: ADHD is often linked to emotional dysregulation, where individuals may have difficulty managing their emotions and reactions to stress. When combined with the effects of substance use, which can further impair judgment and emotional control, sensory overload can lead to emotional outbursts and/or heightened irritability, aggression, or feelings of helplessness in response to overwhelming stimuli.
  • Triggers and Cravings: Certain sensory environments can serve as triggers for cravings or relapse in individuals in recovery. For instance, loud music or crowded spaces might remind someone of experiences associated with substance use, leading to uncomfortable feelings or a desire to self-medicate with drugs or alcohol.
  • Social Challenges: Social situations, which can be inherently sensory-rich, may pose additional hurdles for individuals with this dual diagnosis. The combination of ADHD-related impulsivity and the effects of substance use can lead to social anxiety or uncomfortable interactions,11 making it difficult to navigate typical social environments without feeling overwhelmed.

Despite these challenges, individuals with a dual diagnosis can implement tailored strategies, such as the following to manage sensory overload effectively:

Structured Environments: Create calm, predictable spaces at home or work that minimize sensory distractions. Using soft lighting and comfortable textures can help reduce overwhelming feelings.

Mindfulness Techniques: Mindfulness and grounding exercises can be particularly beneficial for those experiencing sensory overload. Techniques such as deep breathing or focusing on one sensory aspect at a time can help regain control.

Professional Support: Engaging with therapists or support groups specializing in dual diagnosis (i.e., Dual Recovery Anonymous/DRA) can provide valuable coping strategies and emotional support. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be particularly effective in addressing both ADHD and substance use issues.

Gradual Exposure: Gradually exposing oneself to social situations or environments that may be overwhelming can help build tolerance and reduce anxiety over time. It may also help to visit these places during less busy times.

Routine Breaks: Scheduling regular breaks during activities or work can help manage sensory input effectively, allowing time to recharge and refocus.

Understanding the complexities of sensory overload in individuals with both ADHD and substance use disorder is crucial for creating effective interventions and support systems. By fostering awareness and employing adaptive strategies, individuals can work toward improving their quality of life while navigating the challenges posed by both conditions.

Effective Coping Skills

Coping skills play a crucial role in managing sensory overload and hypersensitivity for individuals diagnosed with ADHD. These skills provide strategies for recognizing and regulating sensory input, enabling individuals to navigate overwhelming environments more effectively.

Here’s a list of effective coping skills12 that individuals diagnosed with ADHD can use to minimize sensory overload:

  • Create a Calm Space: Designate a quiet area at home where you can retreat when feeling overwhelmed. Use soft lighting, calming colors, and minimal decorations to reduce distractions.
  • Use Noise-Canceling Headphones: Invest in good-quality headphones to block out distracting sounds. Listening to calming music or white noise can also help create a soothing auditory environment.
  • Practice Mindfulness and Deep Breathing: Engage in mindfulness exercises and deep breathing techniques to center your thoughts and reduce anxiety during overwhelming situations.
  • Establish Routine Breaks: Schedule regular breaks during tasks to step away from sensory input. Use this time to engage in a short walk, stretching, or a brief relaxation exercise.
  • Limit Multitasking: Focus on one task at a time instead of juggling multiple activities. This helps reduce cognitive load and allows for better concentration.
  • Use Visual Tools: Utilize tools like planners, to-do lists, or visual timers to stay organized and manage tasks more effectively, reducing the mental noise associated with forgetfulness.
  • Gradual Exposure: If certain environments are overwhelming, consider gradual exposure. Spend short periods in busy settings and gradually increase your time as you become more comfortable.
  • Engage in Sensory Grounding Techniques: Practicing grounding techniques, such as feeling a textured item or aromatherapy, can help refocus your attention and soothe sensory overload.
  • Communicate Preferences: Inform family, friends, or coworkers about your sensory sensitivities, and advocate for environments that accommodate your needs, such as quieter meeting spaces.
  • Stay Hydrated and Well-Nourished: Ensure you are drinking enough water and eating balanced meals. Dehydration or poor nutrition can heighten sensitivity to sensory input.
  • Develop a Personal Sensory Diet: Create a sensory diet that includes a variety of activities tailored to your needs, such as physical exercise, creative pursuits, or calming hobbies that help regulate sensory input.

Implementing these coping skills can empower individuals with ADHD to take control of their sensory experiences, minimize feelings of overload, and enhance their overall quality of life.

What advice would you give to someone navigating both ADHD and a co-occurring condition like anxiety or substance use, especially when it comes to managing overwhelming sensory input?

Navigating both ADHD and a co-occurring condition like anxiety or substance use can feel overwhelming, especially when sensory input becomes too much. Start by identifying your triggers, which can be bright lights, loud noises, or crowded spaces. Develop a plan, like using noise-canceling headphones or taking quiet breaks, to minimize exposure to stimuli, as they can overwhelm your ability to soothe yourself. Prioritize grounding techniques, such as deep breathing or holding onto a totem or object, to help regulate your nervous system when stress peaks.

David Tzall, PhD, Licensed Psychologist

Medication Options

Medications for ADHD, primarily stimulant and non-stimulant options, can play a significant role in alleviating sensory issues and processing challenges associated with the condition. Stimulants, such as methylphenidate (i.e., Ritalin, Concerta) and amphetamine-based (i.e., Adderall, Vyvanse) medications, work by increasing levels of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain, enhancing attention, focus, and impulse control.

By improving these cognitive functions, individuals may find it easier to filter and manage sensory input, reducing feelings of overwhelm. Non-stimulant medications, like atomoxetine, can also assist with attention and impulse regulation, contributing to improved emotional stability and social interactions. Ultimately, medication can serve as a valuable component in a comprehensive treatment plan aimed at addressing both ADHD symptoms and sensory processing difficulties.

The Bright Side of ADHD

While ADHD can present challenges, many individuals who effectively manage their symptoms find that they can enjoy several unique benefits. Here are some potential advantages of having ADHD when it is well-controlled:

  • Creativity and Innovation: Individuals with ADHD often think outside the box and are capable of coming up with creative solutions to problems. Their ability to connect unrelated ideas can lead to innovative thinking and unique perspectives.
  • Hyperfocus Ability: One of the hallmark traits of ADHD is the capacity for hyperfocus—becoming intensely absorbed in tasks that are stimulating or interesting. This can lead to high productivity levels when working on projects or pursuits that capture one’s attention.
  • High Energy Levels: Many individuals with ADHD possess abundant energy, which can be channeled into productive activities. When managed well, this energy can enhance performance in both work and hobbies.
  • Adaptability and Flexibility: Individuals with ADHD often learn to adapt quickly to changing situations. Their experiences in navigating diverse environments can foster a sense of flexibility that is beneficial in fast-paced careers.
  • Strong Problem-Solving Skills: The ability to see the bigger picture and navigate complexities can lead to exceptional problem-solving skills. Many individuals with ADHD excel in high-pressure situations where quick thinking is required.
  • Passion and Enthusiasm: People with ADHD often approach their interests and passions with great enthusiasm. This can infectious energy can inspire and motivate others in collaborative settings.
  • Resilience: Overcoming the challenges posed by ADHD can develop strong resilience and perseverance. Many individuals become adept at facing obstacles and finding creative ways to overcome themwhat-is-sensory-overload.
  • Outstanding People Skills: Many individuals with ADHD are outgoing and enjoy engaging with others. They can form strong interpersonal connections and excel in social situations, often being perceived as charismatic or engaging.
  • Enhanced Multitasking Abilities: While multitasking can be challenging, people with ADHD often thrive on switching between tasks, enabling them to manage various projects simultaneously when it fits their work style.
  • Unique Learning Styles: Individuals with ADHD may have unconventional learning styles that can foster creativity and a different approach to acquiring knowledge. This adaptability can lead to innovative ways of thinking and working.

When individuals with ADHD effectively harness and manage their symptoms through strategies like mindfulness, organizational tools, and support systems, they can turn these potential advantages into strengths in both their personal and professional lives.

Conclusion

If you or someone you know is grappling with sensory overload related to ADHD, seeking support is essential. This can be achieved through therapy, where professionals can offer tailored strategies and coping mechanisms. Connecting with support groups or community resources can also provide valuable insights and camaraderie. Developing skills such as mindfulness, organizational techniques, and creating a structured environment can help mitigate the effects of sensory overload.

Remember, while the challenges associated with ADHD and sensory overload13 can be daunting, there is hope for growth and improvement. With the right tools and support, individuals can learn to navigate their environments more comfortably, embracing their unique strengths and perspectives.

Stay committed to your journey; every step taken toward understanding and managing sensory overload brings you closer to a fulfilling and balanced life. You are not alone in this journey, and brighter days are ahead.

FAQs

Q. What is sensory overload in relation to ADHD?

A. Sensory overload occurs when individuals with ADHD experience an overwhelming amount of sensory input, such as sights, sounds, strong smells, or tactile sensations. This can lead to heightened anxiety, irritability, difficulty concentrating, and emotional distress.

Q. What are common triggers for sensory overload in individuals with ADHD?

A. Common triggers include loud noises, bright or flickering lights, crowded environments, strong odors, emotional stress, and visual clutter. These stimuli can easily overwhelm someone with ADHD, making it hard to focus or regulate emotions.

Q. How can coping skills help manage sensory overload?

A. Coping skills provide individuals with strategies to recognize and manage sensory input. Techniques like mindfulness, deep breathing, using fidget tools, taking breaks, and creating structured environments can significantly reduce feelings of overwhelm and improve focus.

Q: When should I seek professional help for ADHD sensory overload?

A: It’s advisable to seek professional help if sensory overload symptoms disrupt daily life, lead to emotional distress, or affect relationships. Professionals such as psychologists, psychiatrists, and occupational therapists can provide support and effective interventions.

Q: What types of therapies are beneficial for managing sensory overload?

A: Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is commonly used to help individuals develop coping strategies and emotional regulation skills. Occupational therapy may focus on sensory integration techniques to help individuals better handle sensory input.

Q: Are medications available to help with ADHD sensory overload?

A: Yes, medications designed to manage ADHD symptoms, such as stimulants and non-stimulants, can help reduce impulsivity and improve attention, which may indirectly reduce sensory overload experiences. It’s important to consult with a psychiatrist to determine the best medication and dosage.

Q: Can changes in diet or lifestyle help with sensory overload?

A: While individual results may vary, adopting a balanced diet, regular exercise, and maintaining a consistent sleep schedule can positively impact overall well-being and ADHD symptoms. Some individuals may find it helpful to limit stimulants like caffeine or sugar, which can exacerbate sensory sensitivities.

Q: What are some effective sensory tools to mitigate overload during daily activities?

A: Useful sensory tools include noise-canceling headphones, earplugs, fidget toys, weighted blankets, visual timers, and calming scents (like essential oils). These items can help manage sensory input and promote a more comfortable environment.

Q: How can I advocate for my sensory needs in various environments?

A: Communicating openly about your sensory needs with family, teachers, or coworkers can help create accommodations. You can discuss specific triggers and suggest practical solutions, such as using quieter spaces, reducing visual clutter, or incorporating sensory breaks to help manage overload.

Q: Is sensory overload a lifelong issue for individuals with ADHD?

A: While many individuals with ADHD may experience sensory overload throughout their lives, effective coping strategies and interventions can significantly mitigate its impact. With the right support and techniques, individuals can learn to navigate and manage sensory challenges more successfully.

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Kate Garn’s 13 Insights on Breaking Free From Hidden Alcoholism

Kate Garn joined Recoverycast to share her powerful journey through the depths of alcohol dependence and her inspiring climb toward sobriety. Her story, filled with raw honesty and vulnerability, sheds light on the often-hidden struggles of functional alcoholism, the impact of postpartum depression, and the transformative power of finding connection in recovery. Kate’s narrative underscores the crucial message that addiction doesn’t always look like the stereotypical image, and that finding a path to a healthier life is possible.

1. The Gradual Descent: From Social Drinking to Coping Mechanism

Kate’s relationship with alcohol began in high school, a seemingly typical experience for many. However, what started as occasional social drinking gradually morphed into a coping mechanism, particularly as she navigated the pressures of young adulthood and the drinking culture prevalent in hair school and the service industry.

“It had just become something that was normal to me,” Kate reflected. “It was routine. I wanted to unwind after work. I wanted to, you know, my body hurt, my mind was exhausted, everything. And I just wanted to numb it.” This highlights how easily social drinking can transition into a reliance on alcohol to manage stress and emotions.

2. Postpartum Depression: A Turning Point Towards Dependence

The arrival of her son brought immense joy, but also an overwhelming wave of postpartum depression, exacerbated by a traumatic birth experience. Kate recounted the harrowing moments after her son’s birth, stating, “I still remember the feeling that I had when he started breathing…” This trauma created significant anxiety and sleep deprivation, leading her to self-medicate with alcohol.

“When I stopped breastfeeding after three months, I started drinking all the time. ’cause I could now. Mm-hmm. You know, and I knew that’s what I had used before to calm me down.” This period marked a significant shift towards using alcohol as a primary way to cope with intense emotional distress. Postpartum depression is a serious condition affecting many new mothers and can significantly increase the risk of substance use as a form of self-treatment1.

Explore depression treatment options.

3. The Illusion of Control: Functional Alcoholism

Despite drinking frequently and heavily, Kate’s struggles weren’t immediately apparent to those around her. Even her ex-husband, who witnessed her drinking firsthand, didn’t recognize the extent of her dependence. “‘I wasn’t hiding it. You know, he was right there. But even he didn’t think she’s an alcoholic. And when I look at it, I’m like, how? How did you guys not think it?'”

This illustrates the phenomenon of functional alcoholism, where individuals maintain their daily responsibilities while still struggling with alcohol dependence. This can make it difficult for loved ones to recognize the problem and for the individual to acknowledge it themselves.

4. The Internal Disconnect: Masking Pain with Performance

Kate astutely pointed out the internal conflict she experienced, feeling the need to present a certain image to the world while battling inner turmoil. Tom Farley agrees, stating “They’re putting out this person that they think the world wants to see or that they need to be. And it’s not real. And you feel that inside this doesn’t, this is not real for me. And so therefore the only way I to deal with that feeling, at least for me, was to, was to drink.”

This resonates with many individuals who use substances to cope with feelings of inadequacy or inauthenticity. The constant performance can be exhausting and isolating, further fueling the cycle of dependence.

5. Hitting Rock Bottom: The Desire to Not Exist

Kate’s journey reached a critical point where she no longer wanted to live with the pain and dependence. “On the day that I stopped drinking, I was, you know, it was a bad place. It was scary and I had struggled for a long time, but I, it had hit its peak.” This moment of despair often serves as a catalyst for change, a stark realization that the current path is unsustainable and life-threatening. The fear of the impact her addiction would have on her son also played a significant role in her decision to seek help.

Explore alcohol addiction treatment options.

6. Seeking a Lifeline: The First AA Meeting

Facing her desperation, Kate took a courageous step and searched for resources. “I knew what you see on tv, AA, or rehab. Like, that’s where my mind went. So that’s what I Googled that morning.” Her discovery of a local AA meeting, particularly an all-women’s meeting, proved to be a pivotal moment. The sense of connection and shared experience she found there was crucial in her early sobriety.

7. The Power of Connection: Finding Common Ground

Walking into that first meeting, Kate had preconceived notions about what it would be like. “For me, when I pictured AA meetings, I didn’t picture a bunch of women like me. I pictured a bunch of women who had lost everything. Homeless, you know, worst case scenario.”

Instead, she found a community of regular women who understood her struggles. “To see and hear what these women had to say really like, struck a chord with me. Like, I was like, wow. They are regular people. Living, you know, life every day. Like a lot of people do. Their stories, some of them very similar to mine.” This sense of belonging and relatability is a cornerstone of successful recovery.

8. Beyond Dry Drunk: Embracing the Steps

Early in her sobriety, Kate described herself as a “dry drunk,” indicating that she had stopped drinking but hadn’t yet addressed the underlying issues fueling her addiction. It wasn’t until she began working the 12 Steps that she started to experience true recovery and healing.

“When I finally got, you know, to the point where I was ready to work the steps, because I think before that I just really wasn’t ready. I couldn’t get myself there. So when I finally started doing that and seeing the benefits of it…” The 12 Steps provide a structured framework for self-reflection, accountability, and spiritual growth, which are vital for long-term sobriety.

9. Finding Motivation: Doing It for Someone Else

While the common advice in recovery is to focus on oneself, Kate found her primary motivation in her son. “‘They say do it for you. I do it for him. I’m second there and I know that’s, you know, everyone’s like, no, it’s you. And it’s like, I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him. It is healthy for me to think this is for Mac because I didn’t value my own life like that.'” This highlights that the path to recovery can be deeply personal, and finding a strong external motivator can be a powerful initial driving force.

10. The Vulnerability of Sharing: TikTok as a Platform for Connection

Kate’s journey took an unexpected turn when she began sharing her experiences on TikTok. This platform became an outlet for her raw honesty and vulnerability, creating a space for connection with others facing similar challenges. “I’m a vulnerable person. I’m raw, I’m honest. That’s what my TikTok is… I just am who I am.” Her willingness to share her struggles openly has resonated with a large audience, fostering a sense of community and reducing the stigma surrounding addiction.

11. The Power of Unseen Support: “I Love Who You Are Sober”

A poignant moment in Kate’s story was her mother’s heartfelt affirmation during a difficult time in early sobriety. “I was crying, and my mom came over and she was like being super supportive to me and I just told her, you know, I want a drink. And she was like, but I love who you are sober. And it just like I do, I get super emotional when talking about that because it’s like, that just shows me like they have never known me.” This powerful statement underscored the profound difference sobriety had made in Kate’s true self, a self that had been obscured by alcohol for so long.

12. Navigating the Journey: Amends and Self-Compassion

Kate touched upon the challenging aspect of making amends in recovery, acknowledging the difficulty of confronting past actions. She also highlighted the importance of self-compassion, recognizing the progress she has made rather than dwelling solely on past mistakes. “‘Getting sober, you realize so many things about yourself when you get sober.’ ‘Well, it’s about your pain, not theirs.'” This emphasizes the introspective nature of recovery and the need to focus on personal healing.

13. The Misunderstanding of Shame: Finding Strength in Vulnerability

Kate addressed the negative feedback she sometimes receives for being so open about her struggles, with some suggesting she should be ashamed. However, her vulnerability is precisely what allows others to feel less alone. By sharing her truth, Kate is breaking down stigma and offering hope to others on their own recovery journeys.

Kate’s story is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the power of seeking help and connection. Her journey from functional alcoholism and the depths of postpartum depression to a place of sobriety and open sharing offers a beacon of hope for anyone struggling with addiction. It reminds us that recovery is possible, and that finding a supportive community can make all the difference.

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Maureen’s Journey in Eating Disorder Recovery and Self-Love

The Giving Voice to Mental Health Podcast recently shared a deeply personal story of resilience with Maureen, who recounted her journey through an eating disorder that began during her time as a ballet dancer in the 1980s. Her powerful narrative offers crucial understanding and hope for individuals facing similar challenges and those who support them. Hosts Terry McGuire and Caroline Beidler guided a conversation that illuminated the isolation of struggling with an eating disorder when awareness was limited, contrasting it with the growing resources available today.

More Than Just Food: Understanding the Core of Recovery

Maureen thoughtfully described her experience not as a “battle,” but as “working through” an eating disorder. This highlights the ongoing and internal nature of recovery, extending beyond just physical health to encompass self-image, self-esteem, and, most importantly, self-love.

“I feel that I am recovering from a combination of… not understanding how to take care of myself. It’s beyond the amount of food that you put in your body, for example, it’s really about self-image and self-esteem and self-love…”

Her words emphasize that true recovery involves a fundamental shift in how one perceives and values themselves.

The Weight of External Expectations: Body Image and Triggers

As a ballet dancer in the 1980s, Maureen faced immense pressure regarding her body image. This environment became a significant trigger, highlighting how external expectations can contribute to the development of eating disorders.

“As a young person in college, I was a dancer, a ballet dancer in the 1980s and at that time, body image was a huge thing and you had to look a certain way and be a certain way in order to perform…”

This experience underscores the importance of recognizing and addressing societal and environmental factors that can fuel disordered eating.

A Long and Winding Road: The Reality of Ongoing Recovery

Maureen’s journey to self-acceptance has spanned decades, illustrating that recovery is rarely a straight path. It involves continuous effort, with challenges and negative thoughts potentially resurfacing.

“It’s taken me this much of my life to arrive at being okay with myself, you know? And even that gets challenged all the time… I’m always in recovery. I’m always working on recovery.”

Her strength lies in her ability to identify unhealthy patterns and consciously choose a healthier direction, affirming, “You’re okay. You’re good just the way you are.”

Explore eating disorder treatment options.

The Harmful Words: What Not to Say to Someone Struggling

Well-intentioned but misguided advice, such as “just eat more,” can be detrimental to someone with an eating disorder. Maureen emphasized the importance of avoiding comments about food altogether.

“Teachers didn’t really know what to do with me. They didn’t know what to say. They just kept saying, well, you have to eat more. You have to eat more. It’s not what, it’s not the right thing to say… Don’t say anything about food. Leave it alone and let me figure it out.”

Instead, she suggests expressing non-judgmental support and focusing on aspects of their life unrelated to food or body image. Suggesting alternative activities, like “Let’s go for a walk,” can be far more helpful.

Finding Support: The Power of Connection

While formal therapy wasn’t consistently available to Maureen in the early stages, she found crucial support in friends, particularly within the modern dance community, which offered a more accepting environment. This highlights the significance of supportive relationships in recovery.

“I found support in friends and interestingly in among dancer friends… I found a really wonderful, supportive community there.”

The lack of readily available professional help in the 1980s underscores the progress made in providing resources today.

A World of Options: Hope for Today and Tomorrow

Maureen reflected on the lack of treatment options available when she was struggling, a stark contrast to the resources that exist now. Today, individuals have access to information, various therapies, peer support groups, and treatment facilities.

“If it happened to me now, I wouldn’t hesitate to look around for a place to go, you know, somebody to talk to or a situation to take care of myself…”

Caroline emphasized the wealth of information available on https://recovery.com/resources/ and the importance of educating ourselves and others about eating disorders and available support.

Embracing Life: Finding Joy in Self-Acceptance

Maureen’s journey ultimately led her to a powerful realization: life is truly good when you treat yourself with kindness and embrace self-acceptance.

“Oh. ’cause life is so good when you’re, when you’re able to treat yourself well. When you’re able to love yourself and accept yourself, life is really, really great.”

This message of hope and the possibility of a more positive and vibrant life serves as an encouragement for anyone currently struggling to believe in their own potential for recovery and self-love.

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Chelsea Ocean on Losing a Loved One to Alcohol Addiction and Navigating Grief

“I used to call him Jekyll and Hyde because he was a perfect man when he was sober. Handsome and perfect and sweet and kind and loving and hardworking… And then when he was drunk, he was the worst human being on the planet, the most manipulative, conniving, careless…” These powerful words from Chelsea Ocean on Recoverycast paint a stark picture of the duality that often characterizes life with someone struggling with alcoholism. Her raw and honest account of loving and ultimately losing her partner, Dan, to this insidious disease offers invaluable insights for anyone navigating the turbulent waters of addiction in their relationships.

Chelsea’s story is a testament to love, resilience, and the heartbreaking realities of alcoholism. Through her journey, we can glean crucial lessons about recognizing the signs, understanding the progression, and coping with the profound impact of addiction on individuals and their loved ones.

The Illusion of Perfection and the Mask of Addiction

Chelsea recounts the early days of her marriage with Dan as “literally perfect.” This highlights a common phenomenon where individuals struggling with early-stage alcoholism can maintain a seemingly normal and even exceptional facade. As Chelsea notes, “people used to come over and be like, how do you guys have such a perfect marriage? Tell us.” This can make it incredibly difficult to recognize the subtle beginnings of a problem.

However, beneath this veneer of perfection, the insidious nature of addiction can take root. As Chelsea later realized, looking back with knowledge about alcoholism’s progression, they were already in the later stages of addiction by the time she recognized a significant issue. This underscores the importance of understanding the stages of alcoholism to identify potential problems early on.

The Gradual Progression and Missed Warning Signs

Chelsea’s initial unawareness of Dan’s increasing tolerance exemplifies how easily the early stages of alcoholism can be missed, especially by those unfamiliar with heavy drinking. “Before he left, we were in stage two, I would say, where he was building a tolerance. But to me who had not been around alcohol… I never noticed anything. He was fine. He never got drunk.” In a culture where social drinking is prevalent, and a high tolerance can even be seen as somewhat impressive, these early signs can be easily dismissed.

It’s crucial to remember that building a tolerance is a physiological adaptation to regular alcohol consumption and a key indicator of developing dependence. What might seem like simply holding one’s liquor well can be a sign of the body adjusting to increasing amounts of alcohol.

The Impact of Environment and Culture

Chelsea poignantly describes the drinking culture within the military and how it may have contributed to Dan’s early drinking habits. “Dan was that kid where he was drinking very young… he was in the military and they all drink in the military.” The high-stress environment, coupled with a bonding culture centered around alcohol, can create a breeding ground for problematic drinking.

The military has acknowledged the challenges of alcohol misuse within its ranks and has implemented programs aimed at shifting the culture and providing support. However, Chelsea’s experience highlights the potential disconnect between stated policies and the lived realities of service members.

The Isolation and Fear of Seeking Help

Chelsea’s account of the military’s unsupportive stance towards active-duty personnel struggling with addiction is deeply concerning. “If you’re active duty and you are an alcoholic or you’re struggling with some sort of addiction or mental health issue, you are afraid to tell anyone because you will lose your job.” This fear of repercussions can create a significant barrier to seeking help, trapping individuals in a cycle of secrecy and isolation.

This situation underscores the critical need for destigmatizing addiction and mental health issues within high-stakes professions and ensuring accessible and confidential support systems.

Recovery.com offers resources for finding support and treatment options.

The Strain on Relationships and the Burden on Loved Ones

Chelsea vividly portrays the emotional turmoil and practical challenges of living with someone whose personality drastically changes under the influence of alcohol. The “Jekyll and Hyde” analogy perfectly encapsulates this jarring contrast. The unpredictability, disappearances, and the constant state of worry take a significant toll on the mental and emotional well-being of the partner and family.

“And I’m home with a newborn baby without another vehicle and just kind of like, okay, well, if he dies, no one’s going to know because I have no clue where he is.” This desperate situation highlights the profound sense of helplessness and fear experienced by loved ones.

The Futility of Control and the Need for Boundaries

Chelsea’s early attempts to control Dan’s drinking – yelling, fighting, hiding credit cards – are common reactions from loved ones desperately seeking to stop the destructive behavior. However, as she learned, “none of that works. All it does is drive you insane.” Addiction is a complex disease, and the individual struggling with it must ultimately choose recovery.

Establishing healthy boundaries becomes crucial for the well-being of the non-addicted partner. This might involve detaching emotionally from the addict’s behavior and focusing on one’s own self-care and safety.

Read how to set healthy boundaries in relationships affected by addiction.

The Rollercoaster of Hope and Disappointment

The cycle of Dan getting “better and then spiral and then get better and then spiral” is a heartbreakingly common experience for families dealing with addiction. These brief periods of sobriety can offer a glimmer of hope, leading loved ones to believe that change is possible. However, without sustained recovery efforts and addressing the underlying issues, relapse is a significant risk.

“Just enough for me to, like, hold on, like, just enough for me to have hope. Well, okay, he was sober for four weeks this time. So he can be sober.” This highlights the emotional manipulation inherent in the cycle of addiction, where intermittent sobriety can reinforce the partner’s hope and commitment.

The Physical Dependence and the Struggle to Stop

Chelsea’s description of Dan’s physical withdrawal symptoms illustrates the powerful grip of physical dependence in later stages of alcoholism. “He wants to be sober. He doesn’t want to drink, but he can’t, he can’t say no… he has tremors or he would get sweats or he would, you know, get anxiety attacks.” This highlights the medical necessity of proper detoxification and medical supervision for individuals with significant alcohol dependence.

The Erosion of Trust and the Impact of Dishonesty

The lack of “rigorous honesty” that often accompanies active addiction erodes the foundation of trust in a relationship. Even seemingly small lies about drinking habits chip away at intimacy and connection. “How many beers did you have?” becomes a loaded question, and the constant deception creates a climate of suspicion and distrust.

The Cycle of Guilt, Shame, and Relapse

Chelsea astutely points out the vicious cycle of guilt and shame that can perpetuate addiction. The negative behaviors and consequences of being drunk lead to feelings of remorse when sober. However, these feelings can be overwhelming and difficult to manage, often triggering a return to drinking as a way to numb the pain.

“When they get sober, what do they have, like you said, you have the guilt and the shame and you don’t want to feel those things, especially as an alcoholic. You can’t manage it… So what do you do? You drink again because you don’t [want to feel it].” Breaking this cycle requires addressing the underlying emotional and psychological issues that contribute to both the addiction and the inability to cope with sobriety.

The Misguided Attempts to “Fix” and the Powerlessness of Love

Chelsea’s heartbreaking account of trying everything to help Dan, including having another child, reveals the desperate measures loved ones often take in their attempts to “fix” the situation. “You think if I could just give them more good, if I could just put more good in their life, it’ll be enough… I can fix it. I can fix it. But you cannot.”

This realization is crucial. While love and support are essential, they cannot force someone into recovery. The individual with the addiction must ultimately make the choice to seek help and commit to the challenging journey of sobriety. Al-Anon is a support group for families and friends of alcoholics that emphasizes detaching with love and focusing on one’s own well-being.

The Breaking Point and the Need for Self-Preservation

The devastating incident following the birth and open-heart surgery of Chelsea’s second child served as a profound breaking point. Dan’s disappearance during this critical time underscored the severity of his addiction and the threat it posed to the well-being of their family.

“So that happened and after that, I was like, Oh, this is it, like, this is the end. I will raise two children by myself. We are done.” This moment of clarity highlights the critical need for self-preservation when living with active addiction. Setting firm boundaries and being prepared to prioritize one’s own safety and the safety of children is paramount.

Choosing Light and Living Fully

Chelsea’s journey, though marked by profound loss, has evolved into a testament to resilience and healing. Today, she lives a full and meaningful life, carrying Dan’s memory forward with love and honesty. She openly speaks about him with her children, ensuring his place in their family narrative while also imparting the crucial lessons learned from his struggles.

Importantly, Chelsea emphasizes that she carries no burden of blame for Dan’s passing, understanding that addiction is a formidable disease. Her focus now is on living her truth, advocating for awareness, and supporting others navigating similar paths, transforming her personal tragedy into a source of hope and empowerment.

Finding Strength in Vulnerability and Sharing Our Stories

Chelsea Ocean’s courageous sharing of her personal story on Recoverycast offers a beacon of hope and understanding for those touched by alcoholism. Her journey underscores the complexities of loving someone with addiction, the importance of recognizing the signs and stages, and the vital need for support and self-care.

Chelsea’s vulnerability is a powerful reminder that by sharing our experiences, we can break the stigma surrounding addiction, raise awareness, and ultimately help others navigate their own journeys toward healing and recovery. If you or someone you know is struggling with alcohol addiction, please know that help is available.

Recovery.com offers a comprehensive directory of treatment centers and resources.

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Katlyn’s 9 Steps Towards Healing from Trauma, Abuse, and an Eating Disorder

In a deeply candid and moving conversation, Katlyn, a survivor in recovery from narcissistic abuse, Complex PTSD, and anorexia, shared invaluable insights into her journey. Her words offer a beacon of hope and practical guidance for anyone grappling with the aftermath of trauma and the challenging path of recovery.

Katlyn’s experience highlights the tumultuous nature of healing, emphasizing that it’s not a linear ascent but rather a complex dance of progress and setbacks. Yet, through vulnerability and the development of crucial coping mechanisms, a more grounded and present life is possible.

1. Recognizing the Need and Finding Inner Strength

Before recovery, Katlyn described emotional instability and chaos, feeling disconnected from the present. The turning point came when she recognized her strength in escaping a harmful situation. “Once I got myself out of that situation, it was a wake up call for me that I had the strength and resilience to remove myself from the situation to even identify the abuse as it is.” This acknowledgment of inner resilience is the crucial first step towards healing.

2. Seeking Support and Building a Foundation

A cornerstone of Katlyn’s recovery was actively seeking support from trusted individuals and professionals. “To help set myself on a path to recovery, I reached out for help, first of all, to people that I trusted with my vulnerable state. Um, I then got myself into some therapy specifically for what I am going through in recovering from.” Therapy, support groups, and even nutritional guidance create a vital network for navigating the complexities of trauma recovery.

Explore treatment options for trauma and eating disorders.

3. Establishing Structure and Self-Care Rituals

Creating daily routines provided Katlyn with stability and fostered self-care. “Just kind of establishing daily rituals for myself, kind of a container and structure for my day…made me feel healthy, clean, loved, and taken care of by myself.” Consistent rituals, even small ones, offer comfort and reinforce self-compassion.

4. Processing Emotions Through Expression

Katlyn found significant benefit in expressing her emotions, whether through journaling or talking. “I think journaling was something else that I started doing daily…my main advice would be to get it out, vomit out the emotion, however you need to do that.” Externalizing feelings prevents them from becoming internalized and allows for greater self-awareness and emotional regulation.

5. Rebuilding the Self with Compassion and Connection

Recovery involves redefining one’s relationship with oneself, moving away from being defined by trauma. “Seeing me for the first time with all of the things that I’ve experienced as a beautiful, strong person versus feeling like those things are me, are defining me.” Connecting with others who have similar experiences breaks isolation and reinforces that healing is possible. Group and family therapy can provide a safe place to foster meaningful connections. Cultivating self-compassion is also key.

6. Allowing Time and Embracing the Nonlinear Journey

Katlyn emphasized the importance of patience in the healing process. “That’s something else that I learned that helped me stay in recovery is that I need time. Time changes things. It gives us new perspectives.” Trauma processing is not linear; it involves ups and downs. Accepting this reality and allowing time for healing is crucial.

7. Cultivating Present Moment Awareness and Reclaiming Joy

Finding grounding in the present and rediscovering joy are vital aspects of recovery. “Having started my recovery journey, my life now is definitely a lot more present…my life is filled with…just a lot of good freaking food.” Engaging with the present and allowing oneself to experience pleasure, even in small ways, counteracts the negative impacts of trauma.

8. Setting Boundaries and Communicating Needs

Learning to identify fear, set boundaries, and communicate needs empowers survivors. “I have had to retrain myself to defend myself and recognize when I’m having, um, an intuition of fear…I have the tools and, um, capacity to communicate that versus being stuck.” Developing these skills is essential for self-protection and building healthy relationships.

9. Embracing Change and Recognizing Inner Strength

Katlyn offered a powerful message of hope and resilience. “The advice that I would give someone who is a survivor of anything traumatic is that things will change and that you deserve to see out the change…remind yourself how strong you are, how worthy you are.” Recognizing one’s inherent strength and the impermanence of difficult times fuels the ongoing journey of recovery. Even acknowledging the desire for change is a significant and brave first step.

Katlyn’s journey underscores that healing from trauma is a multifaceted process that requires courage, support, and self-compassion. By embracing these essential steps, individuals can begin to find their footing and move towards a more grounded and hopeful future.

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Neurodivergent Symptoms: Insights and Resources for Enhanced Well-Being

Neurotypical people follow conventional paterns of thinking and behavior that align with societal expectations whereas neurodivergent brains function in unique ways. Neurodivergence is not a medical term, though some people with neurodivergence have a formal diagnosis of medical conditions like autism, ADHD, or dyslexia.

The idea of neurodiversity1 was introduced by Judy Singer in 1998 to highlight natural variation in brain development.

5 most common neurodivergent traits graphic

What It Means to Be Neurodivergent

Neurodivergent refers to individuals whose brains function differently from what is considered typical. This includes conditions like autism spectrum disorder (ASD), ADHD, dyslexia, and more.

These differences are not deficits, but rather natural variations in human brain function.

Neurodivergent individuals may face challenges2 in areas like communication, social interaction, or sensory processing, but they also possess unique strengths, such as creativity, problem-solving, or attention to detail.

People with neurodivergence can thrive by focusing on their abilities rather than limitations.

What are some effective strategies for supporting neurodivergent individuals in social settings, especially those struggling with social cues or anxiety?

When it comes to supporting neurodivergent people, it’s all about coming from a place of understanding and honoring neurocognitive differences. It’s not about teaching them how to socialize like a neurotypical person — it’s about guiding and supporting them so they can engage socially in ways that are meaningful to them.

When they understand their own sensory processing, they can begin to advocate for sensory-friendly environments when going out with friends. They may discover strategies or tools that support them socially, like fidgets, noise-dampening headphones, or choosing lower-stimulation settings.

Sarah Anderson, OTD, OTR/L | Elevated Wellbeing OT

Neurodivergent Conditions

The following are considered to be neurodivergent conditions:

  • Autism spectrum disorder (ASD)
  • Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
  • Dyslexia
  • Dyscalculia
  • Intellectual disabilities
  • Sensory processing disorders
  • Social anxiety

Notably, neurodivergence is not a medical term but a framework for understanding diverse ways of thinking and processing the world.

neurodivergence masking hidden self quote illustration

Recognizing the Symptoms of Neurodivergence

Neurodivergence encompasses a range of cognitive and developmental conditions that can manifest in various ways.

Common conditions under this umbrella3 include autism, ADHD, dyslexia, dyspraxia, and dyscalculia. Each of these conditions presents a unique set of symptoms, but there are general patterns that may be signs of neurodivergence.

  • People with autism often face challenges with understanding social cues which can make social situations uncomfortable and lead to difficulty in forming relationships. Additionally, people with autism and may display repetitive behaviors, demonstrate sensory sensitivities, and/or show intense interests in specific topics.
  • ADHD is commonly associated with difficulty in sustaining attention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity, though individuals with ADHD may also exhibit periods of hyperfocus, especially on areas of interest.
  • Dyslexia primarily impacts reading, spelling, and writing, with individuals often struggling with word recognition and decoding skills.
  • Dyscalculia is often referred to as, “math dyslexia” and can make it challenging for individuals to understand number concepts, perform basic arithemtic, tell time, and/or estimate quantities.
  • Dyspraxia affects coordination and motor skills, making everyday tasks like tying shoes or writing challenging for those affected.

While these neurodivergent symptoms may be noticeable from an early age, it’s important to recognize that they can vary significantly in severity from person to person.

Additionally, many neurodivergent individuals also experience co-occurring mental health conditions, such as anxiety or depression, which can further complicate symptom recognition. By understanding these diverse traits and challenges, we can better identify when someone may be neurodivergent and offer the right support and accommodations.

Impact on Daily Life

Being neurodivergent comes with both strengths and challenges that impact daily living.

Neurodivergent individuals often experience the world in unique ways, which can influence how they interact with their environment, approach tasks, and manage social situations. For instance, people with ADHD and autism have difficulties with time management, completing tasks, or understanding social cues.

Neurodivergence is often linked to an increased likelihood of experiencing mental health conditions like anxiety and depression. At the same time, neurodivergent people may demonstrate exceptional creativity, problem-solving abilities, or hyperfocus in certain areas of interest.

Ultimately, understanding and embracing neurodiversity can lead to better support systems in schools, workplaces, and social settings, helping individuals thrive despite these challenges.

common neurodivergent types and symptoms

Mental Health, Addiction, and Neurodivergence

Neurodivergent individuals, particularly those on the autism spectrum, often face heightened mental health challenges, including higher rates of anxiety and depression. These difficulties are influenced by a range of neurodevelopmental, genetic, and environmental factors.

Personalized mental health support4 that is informed by neurodivergence, recognizes the unique ways brains work in neurodivergent individuals. It is crucial that healthcare professionals provide a personalized, holistic approach to treatment when supporting neurodivergent individuals in navigating their mental health struggles and fostering resilience.

While the connection between neurodivergence and addiction is complex, it’s essential to recognize that mental health challenges, and potential mental illnesses, faced by neurodivergent individuals can contribute to the risk of developing addictive behaviors. Co-occurring mental health conditions, such as anxiety or depression, may lead some individuals to turn to substances or other coping mechanisms as a way to manage their symptoms.

Understanding how neurodivergence and mental health challenges intertwine is key to developing effective strategies for addressing addiction in people with neurodivergence.

How can we best address the mental health challenges that often co-occur with neurodivergence, and what role do individualized support systems play in promoting well-being?

Many of the same evidence-based therapies that exist for anxiety, depression, PTSD, and other mental health challenges can be helpful for autistic and ADHD folks, as long as they’re provided in a neurodiversity-affirmative way. Dialectical Behavior Therapy, for example, can help many people who struggle with intense emotions or impulsivity, and it can be adapted to accommodate various sensory, learning, and executive functioning needs.

Therapy is always going to be most effective when the client believes the therapist understands them and is considering their unique preferences, values, and goals. Individualized support systems are so important for promoting well-being, for anyone, but especially for neurodivergent people.

Kiki Fehling, PhD, DBT-LBC

Embracing the Unique Strengths of Neurodiversity

Neurodivergent individuals are often misinterpreted and undervalued; there are many unique cognitive abilities that are frequently viewed as challenges rather than strengths.

Embracing neurodiversity means recognizing the value of the unique ways in which neurodivergent brains work such as exceptional creativity, attention to detail, and intense focus. These strengths can drive innovation and problem-solving in various fields, from technology to the arts.

By fostering inclusive environments that celebrate cognitive diversity throughout society including in schools, universities, and workplaces, we can unlock the full potential of neurodivergent individuals, benefiting both society and the economy. Understanding and embracing these differences in the ways people’s brains work helps create more inclusive spaces where everyone can thrive.

Tips for Promoting Inclusion

Promoting inclusion involves creating environments that recognize and embrace neurodiversity. For schools and workplaces, this means offering individualized support or reasonable accommodations, to ensure that neurodivergent individuals can fully participate and thrive. Encouraging neurodivergent individuals to share their unique perspectives can enhance creativity and problem-solving within teams, ultimately driving innovation.

Training staff and peers on neurodiversity, along with providing accessible resources, further empowers individuals to feel accepted and valued in their communities or workplaces.

It is crucial that all areas of society work to foster a culture of empathy and respect—where differences in thinking and learning are celebrated rather than viewed as deficits. This approach not only benefits neurodivergent individuals but enriches the broader environment by promoting understanding and reducing stigma.

What are some of the most common misconceptions about neurodivergence, and how can we work to challenge these misunderstandings in schools, workplaces, and society at large?

One of the biggest misconceptions about neurodivergence is that it only shows up as visible or disruptive behavior, when in reality, many people mask their differences to fit in, often at the cost of their mental health. Another is assuming neurodivergent individuals are either ‘too much’ or ‘not enough’, rather than recognizing their unique strengths. We can start to challenge these misunderstandings by listening to lived experiences, making room for multiple ways of thinking and processing, and shifting from compliance-based environments to connection-based ones.

Amanda Stretcher Lewis, MA, LPC-S | Crescent Counseling

Improving Well-Being

Improving the well-being of neurodivergent folks requires a multifaceted approach that focuses on enhancing personal strengths, developing appropriate coping mechanisms, and keeping executive functioning in check.

Key resilience factors,5 such as effective emotion regulation, self-determination, and self-understanding, play a crucial role in promoting mental health and quality of life. Neurodivergent individuals who develop strong emotional regulation and adaptive coping strategies are better able to manage stress, reduce anxiety, and improve their overall resilience.

Similarly, fostering self-esteem and self-efficacy—through a sense of agency and competence—has been linked to improved mental health outcomes, including better social functioning and reduced depressive symptoms.

Additionally, cultivating a positive self-identity, including embracing one’s neurodivergence, can contribute to a stronger sense of self-worth and resilience, buffering against the challenges that arise from societal stigma.

Participation in meaningful activities, including leisure, recreation, and community engagement, also plays a vital role in enhancing well-being. These activities not only improve social functioning and life satisfaction but also buffer against negative factors like depression and loneliness. Regular engagement in physical activities, in particular, has been shown to foster resilience, reduce stress, and improve both mental and physical health.

By focusing on building self-awareness, offering opportunities for growth, and ensuring access to supportive environments, it is possible to significantly enhance the well-being of neurodivergent individuals, promoting greater life satisfaction and emotional health.

FAQs

Q: What are 3 signs of being neurodivergent?

A: Neurodivergence can manifest in various ways depending on the individual and their specific condition. A person qualifies as neurodivergent if they process information differently from the general population. Three signs of being neurodivergent are:

  • Behavioral traits that reflect atypical cognitive processing, such as challenges in social interactions, learning, or attention.
  • Diagnosis of a neurodivergent condition (such as autism, ADHD, or dyslexia).
  • Experiencing co-occurring conditions like anxiety or depression.

Q: What makes you considered neurodivergent?

A: You may be considered neurodivergent if you have a neurological condition that leads you to think or behave in ways that are different from the general population.

Q: What is a low-support neurodivergent?

A: A low-support neurodivergent individual is someone who, despite having a neurodivergent condition is able to manage day-to-day tasks, maintain executive functioning, and navigate social situations with minimal support. Many people considered to be low-support face challenges that are not always visible. Note that in the past, this was referred to as “high-functioning.” There is a move away from this language as some with personal experience note that determining a level of functioning does not always match the actual persons internal experience of their needs level.

Q: What is neurodivergence?

A: Neurodivergence refers to the natural variation in how people’s brains work, leading to unique ways of thinking, behaving, and learning. Conditions such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia, and others fall under the neurodivergent umbrella, challenging the concept of a “one-size-fits-all” way of thinking.

Q: Are people born with neurodiversity?

A: Yes, neurodivergence is often present from birth or early childhood. Some conditions, like autism, ADHD, and dyslexia, can be detected early, while others may become apparent as individuals grow older.

Neurodivergence is typically believed to be part of an individual’s genetic makeup, though environmental factors can also influence how traits manifest.

Q: What is regressive autism?

A: Regressive autism refers to a form of autism spectrum disorder (ASD) where children appear to develop typically for a period of time before losing previously acquired skills, such as speech or social abilities. This regression is a subject of ongoing research.

Q: What skills do neurodivergent people have?

A: Neurodivergent individuals often have exceptional skills, particularly in areas like attention to detail, creativity, problem-solving, and pattern recognition.

For instance, people with autism may have intense focus on specific topics, while individuals with ADHD may exhibit creativity and the ability to think outside the box.

Q: What does neurotypical mean?

A: Neurotypical refers to individuals whose cognitive functioning and behavior align with societal norms or expectations. They don’t have conditions like autism or ADHD that lead to unique ways of processing information, learning, or interacting socially.

Q: What are neurodivergent symptoms in adults?

A: In adults, neurodivergent traits may include unique challenges with time management, organization, maintaining focus, or navigating social relationships. These differences are part of the unique way in which you engage with the world and approach daily tasks.

It’s also common for adults with conditions like ADHD or autism to experience co-occurring mental health challenges, such as anxiety or difficulty managing stress.

Understanding these traits allows you to develop strategies that work for you and seek the support that empowers your well-being and success.

Q: How can I tell if I’m neurodivergent?

A: If you find that you approach focus, learning, social interaction, or communication in ways that are unique to you, you may be neurodivergent. These differences are part of the rich diversity of human experience and thinking.

Tools for self-assessment or evaluations from professionals can help you explore whether you identify with conditions like ADHD, autism, or dyslexia. While these traits often become apparent in childhood, they can also evolve and become clearer in adulthood, offering opportunities for self-discovery and growth.

Understanding these traits can empower you to embrace your strengths and seek support in areas where you may need it.

Q: How can I recognize neurodivergent traits in children?

A: In children, neurodivergent traits can manifest as unique ways of engaging with the world, such as deep and focused interests, heightened sensory awareness, and a distinctive approach to social interactions.

These children may demonstrate a strong ability to focus intensely on subjects they are passionate about, often displaying remarkable expertise in those areas.

While they may face challenges with attention, adapting to routine changes, or navigating social situations, these traits are part of their incredible diversity of thought and perspective.

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Wes’s 7 Steps Towards Hope and Joy in Addiction Recovery

The journey of addiction recovery can feel isolating, filled with shame and guilt, especially in its initial stages. If you’re navigating the turbulent waters of substance use or mental health challenges, you might find yourself asking, “Why should I listen to yet another story?”

In a recent episode of the Giving Voice to Addiction Podcast by Recovery.com, Wes, a man in long-term recovery, offered a compelling answer: “Because I have something to share.” His candid account illuminates the arduous path from the depths of addiction to a life brimming with gratitude, humility, and, most importantly, hope and joy.

This article delves into Wes’s powerful narrative, extracting key insights and expanding on the crucial elements of finding recovery. It’s a testament to the fact that even in the darkest of times, a life worth living is attainable.

1. Recognizing the Descent: When Casual Use Turns Problematic

For many, the slide into problematic substance use isn’t a sudden plunge but a gradual erosion of control. Wes described his early experiences with alcohol as normalized within his family culture. However, the transition from casual drinking to a severe alcohol use disorder was marked by pivotal “light switch moments,” particularly the loss of his father and a confluence of stressful life events, including buying a business and the birth of his twins.

“There’s definitely a couple of like, light switches. Light switch moments or moments where I can point to and say, ah, this was some gas on a fire here,” Wes reflected. This highlights how significant life stressors can act as catalysts for escalating substance use as a maladaptive coping mechanism.

It’s crucial to recognize these turning points in your own life. Were there specific events or periods of heightened stress that coincided with an increase in your substance use? Identifying these triggers can be the first step towards understanding the roots of the problem.

2. The Illusion of Control: Secretive Use and Denial

One of the insidious aspects of developing a substance use disorder is the tendency towards secrecy and denial. Wes admitted to being a “very closeted sort of a drinker,” concealing his escalating consumption from his wife and colleagues. He would drink heavily in his car after work, masking his intake by using non-descript containers.

This behavior is often driven by a combination of shame and a desire to maintain a semblance of normalcy. However, as Wes pointed out, certain behavioral changes can be red flags for loved ones: “Eventually some mood changes…meaning anger…not being myself.” These shifts in personality and emotional regulation can be subtle at first but often become more pronounced as the addiction deepens.

If you find yourself going to great lengths to hide your substance use or experiencing significant mood swings, it’s a strong indicator that your relationship with the substance has become unhealthy.

3. The Futility of Willpower Alone: Addiction’s Grip

The point at which willpower alone is insufficient to break free from addiction is a critical realization. Wes recounted a two-year period of sobriety achieved through “white-knuckling it,” only to relapse because he lacked sustainable recovery tools and support.

“Eventually, I realized that, but I was at a point where I couldn’t stop. The addiction that had just taken hold and that chemical dependency…was more than I could…overcome by just willpower,” he explained. This underscores the neurobiological changes that occur with prolonged substance use, leading to cravings and dependence that require more than sheer determination to overcome.

If you’ve repeatedly tried to stop using substances on your own and found yourself unable to maintain sobriety, it’s a sign that professional help and a structured recovery program are necessary.

Explore alcohol addiction treatment options.

4. The False Promise of Moderation: A Common Pitfall

Many individuals struggling with substance use attempt to regain control by moderating their consumption. Wes shared his experience with this common pitfall: “One of the first things we will reach for is, is moderation…Alright. I can, I can cut back, right? I can do this. And…I have yet to meet any of my coachees or mentees um, myself, I have yet to meet somebody that can do that.”

While moderation may be a viable option for some individuals who do not have a substance use disorder, for those with a history of addiction, it often proves to be an unsustainable and ultimately triggering path. Recognizing this personal limitation, as Wes did, is a crucial step towards accepting the need for complete abstinence.

5. The Ripple Effect: Damaged Relationships

Addiction rarely exists in a vacuum; it profoundly impacts the individual’s relationships with family, friends, and colleagues. Wes poignantly described the deterioration of his relationships, including his long-term marriage and his connection with his children. His employees even had to intervene due to his drinking at work.

“My wife of 20 years asked me to leave the house…Walking away from, you know, a marriage of 20 years and four children was pretty hard, you know? So it affected the relationships pretty significantly,” he shared. The consequences of addiction can be devastating, leading to loss of trust, emotional distance, and fractured bonds.

Repairing these relationships is a vital part of the recovery process, requiring vulnerability, honesty, and time. Seeking family therapy or support groups can be instrumental in this healing journey.

6. The Power of Accountability and Readiness

Wes’s turning point came with the stark reality of potentially losing custody of his children. This external accountability, in the form of a monitoring device and regular testing, proved to be a significant catalyst for his sustained sobriety.

“That right there was like, that was a big light switch for me. And what I call that is accountability…I didn’t have a huge accountability piece in my early recovery…And that piece was instrumental for me,” he explained. While external accountability can be crucial, it must also coincide with an internal readiness for change. As Wes noted, “I think it also came at a point when I was ready.”

Finding sources of accountability, whether through support groups, sponsors, or structured monitoring, can significantly strengthen your commitment to recovery. However, this external support is most effective when coupled with a genuine desire for change.

7. Embracing Joy: Life Beyond Sobriety

The ultimate goal of recovery extends far beyond simply abstaining from substances. It’s about rediscovering a life filled with purpose, connection, and joy. Wes beautifully articulated this distinction: “I feel like in recovery you’re joyful…I’m fricking sober. Like, yeah, this, this is good.”

This sentiment echoes the understanding that true recovery involves a holistic transformation, addressing not only the physical dependence but also the underlying emotional and psychological factors that contributed to the addiction. It’s about building a fulfilling life where substances no longer hold power.

As Caroline Beidler aptly summarized, “The recovery journey and getting well in recovery isn’t just about stopping our substance use…It’s about discovering this new life this life of joy and purpose and hope.”

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Finding Your Way Back: Coda’s 8 Steps for Healing Depression and Anxiety

For anyone grappling with the heavy weight of depression and anxiety, the path to recovery can feel shrouded in mist, the first step an insurmountable climb. It’s a journey often marked by isolation, a sense of being trapped within oneself, and the daunting prospect of facing the outside world. Coda knows this terrain intimately.

In his candid account, Coda shares his personal battle with depression and anxiety, offering a beacon of hope and practical insights for those seeking their own path toward healing. His story underscores a powerful truth: recovery is possible, and it begins with taking that first brave step.

1. Recognizing the Depths of Isolation

Before embarking on his recovery journey, Coda found himself ensnared in the suffocating grip of isolation. “Before I started my recovery journey, I was in bed all day. I didn’t hang out with anybody. I didn’t talk to anybody. I was completely isolating myself because the thought of going outside was just so terrifying to me.” This profound isolation manifested physically, leading to bed sores from prolonged periods in bed and significant weight loss due to a lack of appetite.

This paints a stark picture of how deeply mental health struggles can impact not only our emotional state but also our physical well-being. The fear of the outside world, amplified by external circumstances like the COVID-19 pandemic, solidified a belief that retreating was the only safe option. This highlights how external events can sometimes exacerbate underlying anxieties and depressive tendencies.

2. The Wake-Up Call: Physical Manifestations

The turning point for Coda came with a stark realization of the physical toll his condition was taking. “I noticed it was time to make a change or get some help when I got up one day to shower after being in bed for two weeks And I noticed how skinny my face got. And I could see all of my bones through my body. I just didn’t look like myself.”

This moment of confronting his physical deterioration served as a powerful catalyst for change. Recognizing the tangible impact of his mental state provided the necessary impetus to seek help. This emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and acknowledging when our struggles begin to manifest physically.

3. The Power of External Support

While the journey of recovery is ultimately personal, the support of others can be instrumental. Coda credits his guidance counselor for helping him recognize the academic consequences of his isolation. “I was also falling very far behind in school, and I had a great guidance counselor who helped me realize, hey, if you don’t get up and do something about this, you’re gonna have to repeat your sophomore year of high school.”

This highlights the crucial role that supportive individuals can play in prompting us towards seeking help. Sometimes, an external perspective can provide the clarity needed to acknowledge the severity of the situation and motivate action.

4. Embracing Professional Guidance: The Role of Therapy

One of the most significant steps Coda took was seeking professional help. “One big thing I did to help set me up on the path to recovery, get in touch with a therapist. It’s always nice just to have somebody that you can vent to and give advice unjudged.” Therapy provides a safe and confidential space to explore difficult emotions and develop coping mechanisms.

Coda emphasizes the importance of having an unbiased listener, especially when feelings of shame or the fear of judgment prevent open communication with loved ones. The therapeutic relationship can offer validation and guidance without the perceived biases that might exist in personal relationships.

5. The Power of Small Beginnings

Overcoming the inertia of depression and anxiety often requires starting with small, manageable steps. Coda shares a simple yet effective strategy: “Just getting up lighting a candle, there were days where I would just sit in bed constantly and never move. And simply getting up and taking a shower to start your day. It helps kind of wake your body up and get you ready for things that you might not have been doing before. It kind of tricks your brain into being like, okay, we’re in go mode now.”

These small acts of self-care can create a ripple effect, gradually building momentum towards more significant changes. The act of showering, lighting a candle, or any small positive action can disrupt negative patterns and signal to the brain that change is possible.

6. You Are Not a Burden: Breaking Stigma

A common hurdle for individuals struggling with mental health is the feeling that their problems are insignificant or that they are burdening others. Coda articulates this struggle: “I was embarrassed to tell people. Oh, you know, I feel like nobody’s there for me, even though I had all these friends and all of these family members who would throw themselves in front of a train for me, and it made me feel like my problems were less significant than others. And that’s just not true because if these problems are affecting you in this way, they’re just as important as anybody else’s.”

This is a powerful reminder that everyone’s struggles are valid, regardless of how they might compare to others’ experiences. Acknowledging the legitimacy of one’s own pain is a crucial step towards healing. “One big thing that I learned, that helped me stay on the path to recovery is it’s okay to ask for help. There’s a lot of stigma around mental health and how everybody’s going through the same thing, so why should you feel this way? But that also opens up a new possibility that, you know, anybody could be going through what you’re going through. That’s why we need to talk about it.”

The fear of judgment and the misconception that one is alone in their struggles often prevent individuals from seeking the support they need. Openly discussing mental health can create a more understanding and supportive environment, encouraging others to seek help without shame.

7. The Empowering Truth: You Are Your Own Savior

Coda shares a powerful mantra that guides his continued recovery: “One major, major piece of advice I have, uh, that I currently live by is that no one’s coming to save you but you. Um, and what that means is no one’s gonna come and get you outta bed every day. No one’s gonna make you take a shower. No one’s gonna make you do things that make you feel happy. It’s all up to you to do those things.”

This emphasizes the importance of self-reliance and internal motivation in maintaining recovery. While external support is valuable, the sustained effort and commitment to one’s well-being ultimately come from within.

8. The Promise of a Brighter Future Through Help

For those hesitant about seeking help, Coda offers an encouraging perspective: “One thing I would say to someone on the fence about considering getting help is your life will turn around exponentially. You’ll start experiencing things that you haven’t experienced in a very long time.” He reiterates the importance of recognizing that one is not alone and that resources are available. Choosing to seek help is an investment in a better future, breaking free from the cycle of suffering and opening oneself up to new possibilities and experiences.

Coda’s story is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the possibility of finding light even in the darkest of times. His experiences offer valuable lessons for anyone navigating the challenges of depression and anxiety, reminding us that recovery is a journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and the courage to seek help and embrace change.