Tag: Mental Health

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Sensory Processing and Mental Health: An Introduction: Dr. Sarah Anderson

Our senses shape how we experience the world—the sights we see, the sounds we hear, the textures we touch, the flavors we taste, and the scents we smell. While many people find everyday sensory experiences manageable or even enjoyable, others may find certain stimuli overwhelming or insufficient, creating challenges in their daily lives. By deepening our understanding of sensory processing and its link to mental health, we can foster greater well-being and support more effective paths to recovery.

What Is Sensory Processing?
Sensory processing refers to how your body and brain receive, recognize, and interpret sensory information (Brown et al., 2019). This process begins when your nervous system detects sensory stimuli through various receptors, leading to a behavioral response. For example, imagine hearing a loud alarm while working at your desk. You recognize the sound as a fire alarm, observe others moving toward safety, and are prompted to follow them. This highlights how sensory processing helps you respond adaptively to your environment.

There is variability in sensitivity to sensory stimuli based on individual thresholds (Brown et al., 2019). A high threshold indicates that a person needs a stronger stimulus to notice it, whereas a low threshold means even minimal stimuli can become overwhelming. For instance, while most people would quickly respond to a loud fire alarm, individuals who are hyper-responsive to auditory stimuli may find such sounds painful, causing long-lasting dysregulation. On the other hand, those who are hyposensitive may require a stronger stimulus for recognition.

While many people are familiar with the five traditional senses—sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell—three lesser-known senses are also critical for understanding sensory processing: proprioception (awareness of body position), vestibular (balance and movement), and interoception (awareness of internal body states) (Brown et al., 2019). In individuals with typical sensory processing, the brain effectively organizes and integrates sensory information, allowing appropriate responses to stimuli. For example, a person might walk along a crowded street, effectively filtering out distractions like billboards and other pedestrians, or engage in a conversation in a busy café without becoming overwhelmed by the surrounding noise and activity. Those with atypical sensory processing may struggle to take in stimuli and modulate their responses, leading to feelings of overwhelm or anxiety. 

A Model for Understanding Sensory Processing 

As a mental health occupational therapist, I use a specific framework to understand my clients’ sensory processing patterns—Dunn’s Sensory Processing Model. This model categorizes sensory processing into four quadrants (or patterns), each representing different ways individuals respond to sensory input (Brown et al., 2019):

Sensation Seeking

These individuals actively pursue intense sensory experiences and are often drawn to environments that provide heightened stimulation. They tend to crave loud environments, bright colors, and high levels of movement. Sensation seekers often thrive in situations that involve excitement and novelty. 

For example, they may enjoy engaging in contact sports such as football or rugby, where the physicality and intensity provide both sensory input and an adrenaline rush. Similarly, thrilling amusement park rides, like roller coasters, offer the fast movement and sensory overload they enjoy. Additionally, these individuals may find pleasure in activities such as dancing at loud clubs, racing motorcycles, or participating in extreme sports like skydiving or rock climbing, where the combination of physical exertion and sensory excitement is high. Sensation seekers are often drawn to high-energy, sensory-rich environments because they help satisfy their need for stimulation.

Sensation Avoiding

People with sensation avoiding patterns feel uncomfortable with strong sensory stimuli and actively limit their exposure to prevent stress or overwhelm. These individuals are particularly sensitive to intense or overstimulating environments, and they often seek out quiet, calm spaces to feel more in control and at ease. The key characteristic of sensation avoiders is that they make a conscious effort to avoid situations that may lead to sensory overload. 

For instance, they may prefer online shopping over visiting crowded stores because the noise, bright lights, and large crowds can cause distress. Similarly, they may choose to eat and converse at home rather than going to noisy restaurants, where the sounds, smells, and social interactions can be overwhelming. In other contexts, sensation avoiders might prefer a peaceful walk in nature over attending a crowded event or concert. They may also avoid certain types of music or films that feature loud noises or flashing lights due to their heightened sensitivity. By actively limiting sensory exposure, sensation avoiders can maintain a sense of comfort and reduce anxiety caused by overstimulation.

Sensory Sensitivity

Sensory-sensitive individuals, like sensation avoiders, are highly attuned to sensory stimuli and can become overwhelmed or anxious when exposed to certain sounds, sights, or other sensations. They are particularly responsive to environmental inputs, such as bright lights, strong odors, or loud noises. However, the key distinction between sensory sensitivity and sensation avoidance lies in their reaction to these stimuli. While sensation avoiders actively work to limit their exposure to sensory triggers, sensory-sensitive individuals do not necessarily avoid them. Instead, they confront and endure these sensory experiences, often feeling the full intensity of the distressing sensations. 

For example, a sensory-sensitive individual might attend a concert despite being sensitive to loud music, or they might work in a busy office environment even though the noise and activity create discomfort. The difference here is that, rather than avoiding these situations, they are exposed to them and may struggle to manage their heightened sensitivity, leading to feelings of overwhelm, irritability, or anxiety.

Low Registration

Individuals in this category may not notice sensory input readily, requiring stronger or more intense stimuli to respond. This can make them appear inattentive or uninterested in their surroundings, as they may not pick up on subtle sensory cues that others might notice immediately. For example, they may not be aware of a ringing phone, a colleague speaking to them, or even a change in the temperature of the room until the sensory input becomes more intense or disruptive. Because of this, people with low registration might be perceived as daydreaming, disengaged, or disinterested, but in reality, they are simply less responsive to sensory input.

These individuals often need support systems built into their environment to help them stay on track and become more aware of important stimuli. For example, they might benefit from the use of alarms to signal tasks or appointments, sticky notes as reminders for daily responsibilities, or bright, noticeable signs to highlight important information. These external cues help trigger their attention and provide necessary prompts to remain engaged with their environment.

In some cases, individuals with low registration may not respond to social cues or environmental changes unless they are more extreme. For example, they may not notice a subtle shift in tone when someone is upset with them, but if the person becomes visibly angry or vocal, they are more likely to react. Similarly, they might not notice a decrease in room temperature until it becomes very cold or uncomfortable. The challenge lies in their ability to process and respond to sensory stimuli only when the input reaches a certain threshold of intensity. While this pattern of sensory processing may not necessarily cause distress or anxiety for these individuals, it can lead to difficulties in social or work environments, where a heightened awareness of sensory details and a more timely response are often necessary.

It is important to know sensory processing is not always uniform across all sensory modalities, and people may display different patterns depending on the type of sensory input they encounter. For example, while someone might avoid certain auditory stimuli, they may actively seek out specific tactile or oral sensory experiences. This complexity emphasizes the importance of tailoring sensory interventions to the unique needs of each individual, ensuring that therapeutic approaches are both comprehensive and personalized. 

The Relevance of Sensory Processing in Mental Health
Many individuals with mental health conditions, including anxiety disorders, depression, ADHD, OCD, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), exhibit sensory processing differences (Brown et al., 2019). For those with anxiety, sensory overload can exacerbate symptoms, leading to panic and avoidance behaviors. An individual with sensory avoidance patterns may steer clear of crowded social events, often resulting in isolation and increased feelings of loneliness.

Additionally, a study by Jerome and Liss (2005) explored the relationship between sensory processing patterns and attachment types. The authors found that sensory sensitivity correlates with relationship anxiety, while sensory avoidance relates to relationship avoidance; low registration is associated with both forms of relationship discomfort, and sensory seeking is linked to secure attachment.

Sensory processing can also play a key role in building resilience and supporting recovery. Engaging in positive sensory experiences promotes overall well-being and helps individuals feel grounded during times of distress. Interventions that include sensory-based strategies, such as mindfulness practices and grounding exercises, have been shown to support nervous system regulation (Miller et al., 2007). For example, practicing deep breathing while focusing on tactile sensations like a soft blanket or stress ball can induce relaxation in overwhelming situations. Weighted blankets, in particular, offer deep pressure stimulation that activates calming sensory pathways, reduces anxiety, and boosts melatonin production, fostering a sense of safety and relaxation (Yu et al., 2024). Additionally, introducing a noxious stimulus, such as a sour taste, during a panic attack can help redirect attention. This interrupts the cycle of distress and engages neural pathways that regulate emotional responses (Rainville, 2013).

Practical Strategies for Engaging with Sensory Processing Differences
Understanding one’s sensory processing patterns can lead to effective coping strategies that enhance engagement in daily life. Here are specific strategies tailored to each processing category:

  • For Sensation Seekers: Structured physical activities such as rock climbing or martial arts provide the significant sensory input that sensory seekers benefit from, promoting physical and emotional regulation through intense engagement. Similarly, practices like yoga or tai chi enhance grounding and body awareness through controlled movement. For those craving excitement, adventure activities such as zip-lining offer stimulating sensory experiences while fostering a sense of community and connection with others.
  • For Sensation Avoiders: Gradual exposure to challenging environments, like shopping during off-peak hours, allows sensory avoiders to build tolerance without overwhelming their senses. Comfort tools such as noise-canceling headphones or sunglasses provide instant relief in overstimulating situations. Additionally, calmer venues with softer lighting create a sensory-friendly atmosphere for social interactions, contributing to more positive experiences.
  • For Sensory Sensitivity: Designating a safe space at home equipped with weighted blankets and sensory-friendly items can provide a calming refuge for sensory-sensitive individuals. Mindfulness techniques such as deep breathing and gentle stretching focus on regulation, reducing the effects of sensory overload. Engaging with nature through activities like gardening or hiking can also help mitigate sensory overwhelm by offering grounding sensory input in a peaceful environment.
  • For Low Registration: Individuals with low registration often miss sensory cues, making tools like alarms, sticky notes, or digital reminders valuable in fostering engagement and awareness. For example, placing a sticky note on a desk as a visual cue and pairing it with a timed phone alarm can help reinforce tasks that might otherwise go unnoticed. Incorporating tactile or flavorful experiences into routines, such as savoring meals or exploring varied textures, can further enhance sensory awareness and promote meaningful interaction with one’s environment.

Additional Considerations in Recovery
It’s crucial for centers and programs to have formal sensory assessments such as the Adolescent/adult Sensory Profile, as this helps to understand the unique sensory profiles of the individuals in their care. A formal assessment provides valuable insight into how sensory processing may be affecting their clients’ daily functioning, helping programs identify when sensory processing is a barrier. This enables them to implement targeted interventions and accommodations, ensuring that sensory needs are met. Furthermore, understanding the sensory profiles of individuals allows providers to offer personalized support strategies and create environments that foster greater comfort and engagement. Sensory processing is a foundational aspect of how we navigate the world, and understanding its complexities enables us to support individuals in overcoming challenges so that they can thrive in their daily lives. 

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Thoughtful Gift Giving: Balancing Awareness and Inclusivity: Andrew Schreier

As a licensed professional counselor and clinical substance abuse counselor, I have dedicated my career to helping individuals navigate challenges surrounding substance use, mental health, and behavioral struggles. Working in outpatient therapy, recovery support groups, and community education, I’ve witnessed the role of thoughtful communication and mindful actions in fostering recovery, healing, and deeper human connection.

The holiday season, in particular, allows us to show our care through gift-giving. Giving gifts is a tradition cherished across cultures and generations. The intention of gift-giving can be used to express love, gratitude, and loyalty, demonstrate power, seek prestige, or manipulate relationships. However, this seemingly simple act can carry added weight for many people. For those dealing with substance use recovery, grief, gambling, financial challenges, strained relationships, or separation from loved ones, holidays can intensify emotions that may otherwise remain manageable. 

Understanding these circumstances and approaching gift-giving with care, intention, and inclusivity is critical. This article provides insight into how we can create a culture of mindful gifting—one that celebrates generosity while respecting the needs and experiences of others.

Statistics Related to Gift-Giving

GiftAFeeling provides these statistics from their “103+ Gift Giving Statistics: A Comprehensive Study for 2024”1 to share key insights into understanding gift-giving trends:

  • 85% of People Believe Gifts Strengthen Personal Relationships
    • Giving a gift is a meaningful way to show someone you care. Studies reveal that 85% of people feel gifts help build closer personal connections. It’s not about the item itself but the sentiment behind it, which can make friends, family members, or loved ones feel appreciated and valued. A thoughtful gift can strengthen bonds, creating lasting memories that deepen personal relationships.
  • 67% of People Feel More Appreciated with Recognition Gifts from Loved Ones
    • Receiving a thoughtful gift can make anyone feel recognized and appreciated. In fact, 67% of people feel more valued when they receive a gift that acknowledges a special milestone, such as birthdays, anniversaries, or personal achievements. These gestures remind loved ones that they’re seen and valued, helping build stronger bonds in families and friendships alike.
  • 43% of People Remember Thoughtful Gifts Longer
    • People tend to remember meaningful gifts that show someone really thought about them. Research shows that 43% of people remember gifts longer when the gift is personal and thoughtful. Whether it’s a favorite book, a custom item, or something that aligns with their hobbies, a well-chosen gift can leave a lasting impression, making the gesture feel special and memorable.

Navigating Gift Giving: Recovery and Mental Health 

Gift-giving is one of the hallmarks of the holiday season. It’s a way to express love, appreciation, and gratitude. However, for some, receiving certain gifts or the very act of gift-giving itself can trigger emotional challenges, highlight financial insecurities, or exacerbate feelings of isolation.  The same gift can convey love, gratitude, or shared memories2, while for another might create stress or obligations for both giver and receiver.

Here are a few key challenges to consider:

  1. Substance Use and Mental Health Recovery
    For individuals in recovery, certain gifts can unintentionally undermine their progress. A bottle of wine given to someone abstaining from alcohol, gambling-related items like lottery tickets, or gifts that allude to harmful coping mechanisms can be deeply triggering. While the giver’s intention may be positive, the impact can result in emotional setbacks, shame, or even relapse.
  2. Grief and Loss
    Holidays often magnify the loss of loved ones. For someone spending their first season without a family member or friend—or even years after a passing—grief can resurface strongly. Well-meaning gifts might unintentionally stir up painful reminders. At the same time, overlooking someone’s grief entirely can make them feel unseen or isolated.
  3. Gambling-Related Issues
    Individuals struggling with gambling-related problems may find gift-giving during the holidays challenging due to financial strain, such as limited resources or gambling away money intended for gifts. Emotional factors like guilt, shame, or damaged relationships can further complicate their ability to participate in holiday traditions. The pressure to meet societal expectations or strained connections with loved ones may lead to avoidance of celebrations altogether. It is also common for gambling-related items (such as lottery tickets) to be given as gifts to children and youth who are at risk.
  4. Financial Barriers
    For individuals unable to afford gifts, societal and family expectations during the holidays can create shame, embarrassment, or stress. Gift exchanges often emphasize material items, unintentionally excluding those for whom spending money is simply not feasible.
  5. Separation from Loved Ones
    Whether someone is serving in the military, working away from home, incarcerated, or otherwise unable to be with family, holidays can feel especially lonely. Gift-giving traditions may serve as a reminder of their physical absence, exacerbating feelings of disconnection.
  6. Strained Relationships
    For individuals experiencing tension, estrangement, or conflict within their families, holidays can be emotionally complex. Traditional gatherings and gift-giving can add pressure to reconcile, making them feel conflicted about participating.

When these challenges go unacknowledged, gift-giving can shift from a thoughtful, meaningful practice into something that feels burdensome, exclusionary, or harmful. Instead, a mindful approach to gifting—one that centers on empathy and inclusivity—can transform the act into a powerful gesture of care and connection.

Does Stigma Impact Gift Giving?

The stigma surrounding substance use, mental health, and gambling can have a profound effect on gift-giving.  Assumptions or a lack of understanding about what may be helpful or harmful to individuals dealing with these challenges is a result of stigmas. For example, a well-intentioned gift of alcohol or lottery tickets may unintentionally trigger harmful behaviors or undermine someone’s recovery journey. Similarly, ignoring the unique needs of individuals facing mental health challenges may result in gifts that feel thoughtless or even alienating, reinforcing feelings of isolation or shame. There might also be beliefs that individuals in recovery from substance use, mental health, and recovery don’t deserve gifts because of the impact of their behavior on family members and loved ones.

One of the ways stigma manifests in gift-giving is through avoidance or discomfort. People may hesitate to address sensitive issues or ask what someone might truly need, fearing awkwardness or judgment. This reluctance can perpetuate harmful stereotypes, such as assuming that a person in recovery can “just avoid” triggers or that someone with mental health challenges doesn’t need additional support. By failing to consider the individual’s circumstances and experiences, the act of giving a gift can lose its intended purpose of fostering connection, care, and inclusion.

A Safe Space for Gift-Giving Insight

In my counseling practice, I’ve seen firsthand how thoughtful adjustments to holiday traditions foster healing and strengthen relationships. While our initial reaction to giving and receiving gifts may come with excitement, it’s often common to see how these traditions and culture around the holiday seasons have the opposite impact. I’ve worked with families, individuals, and communities to address some of the challenges outlined above.

For example:

  • Supporting Recovery: One family struggled to adjust their holiday traditions after their loved one entered treatment for alcohol use disorder. They initially felt frustrated at the idea of giving up their long-standing tradition of gifting alcohol as part of a larger family tradition when relatives were over. Through open conversation, they understood that maintaining this tradition was not worth jeopardizing their loved one’s progress and identifying their ultimate goal of giving gifts. They replaced alcohol-related gifts with shared experiences; and their first one was attending a holiday concert together. The family deepened their bonds and honored their loved one’s recovery.
  • Navigating Grief: In another case, a client expressed how painful it was to celebrate the holidays without their partner, who had passed away. Rather than ignoring the loss, their family honored their partner’s memory by sharing stories, cooking their favorite dish, and giving gifts that reflected their shared memories. This acknowledgment of grief brought comfort and inclusion during an otherwise difficult time.
  • Addressing Financial Barriers: During a community workshop, families expressed anxiety about not being able to afford gifts for their children. Together, we explored non-material alternatives—such as handmade crafts, letters of gratitude, or creating “experience coupons” for activities like family game nights or movie marathons. These small gestures carried deep meaning without placing financial strain on the family.
  • Campaign to Gift Responsibly: There are campaigns to commit to gifting responsibly.  The Gift Responsibly Campaign3 by the National Council on Problem Gambling (NCPG) raises awareness about the risks of gifting lottery tickets to minors. The campaign emphasizes that lottery tickets are not appropriate gifts for children, as they can contribute to unhealthy gambling behaviors later in life. By promoting thoughtful and responsible gift-giving, the initiative encourages individuals to consider the long-term impact of their choices during the holiday season. The campaign also highlights the importance of education and prevention in fostering healthy attitudes toward gambling. This example can lead others to consider thoughtful gift giving for areas like substance use, mental health, and grief.

These examples underscore an important point: mindful gift-giving doesn’t require perfection or grand gestures. It simply involves thoughtful consideration of someone’s circumstances, needs, and experiences.

General Tips for Gift-Giving Conversations

Having conversations around gift-giving can be challenging. We may be reluctant to over fear that we are dismissing someone’s excitement or enthusiasm; however, it is important that through conversation we can get to a better idea of what is best for the individuals in relation to gift giving. Start with empathy and intention when discussing gift-giving. Emphasize that the goal is not to criticize traditions but to create thoughtful, inclusive moments that support everyone. Frame the conversation as an opportunity for learning and growing together. Use language like, “This is an opportunity to make our gift-giving more meaningful for everyone.”

  • Share Personal Stories and Examples
    Real-life scenarios can make the message more relatable. Share how small changes in gift-giving have positively impacted others.
  • Encourage Open Conversations
    Normalize questions like:
    • “What kind of gifts do you find meaningful?”
    • “Are there gifts you’d prefer to avoid?”
      Promote curiosity and understanding rather than making assumptions.

The Solution: Strategies for Thoughtful, Inclusive Gift-Giving

Here are actionable strategies to make gift-giving more intentional, inclusive, and supportive for all individuals:

1. Avoid Triggering Gifts

  • For individuals in recovery, avoid gifts related to alcohol, gambling, or other substances. Instead, focus on hobbies, shared experiences, or wellness-related items.
  • Be mindful of individuals grieving a loss. Avoid gifts that unintentionally emphasize the absence of their loved one unless they are specifically chosen to honor their memory.

2. Consider Non-Material or Meaningful Alternatives

  • Shared Experiences: Give gifts that focus on spending time together, such as tickets to events, a home-cooked dinner, or a nature outing.
  • Personalized Gifts: Handwritten letters, photo albums, or handmade items show thoughtfulness and appreciation without relying on materialism.
  • Self-Care Gifts: Journals, books, cozy blankets, candles, or wellness kits can provide comfort and support.
  • Acts of Service: Offering your time—such as helping with chores, cooking meals, or offering childcare—can be an invaluable gift, especially for those under stress.

3. Acknowledge Unique Circumstances

  • For individuals with financial limitations, emphasize gifts that don’t require spending. Organize traditions centered on shared time, games, or storytelling.
  • For those grieving or away from family, consider thoughtful gestures like letters, care packages, or simple check-ins to let them know they are remembered and valued.
  • Respect the boundaries of individuals navigating strained relationships, and create spaces where they can still feel included without pressure.

4. Foster Open Communication

  • Normalize conversations about gift-giving preferences and sensitivities. Asking someone about their comfort level can prevent unintentional harm and help you choose a meaningful gift.
  • Share these practices within your family, workplace, and community to encourage a broader culture of inclusivity.

Beyond the Holidays

While the conversation around thoughtful gift-giving often surfaces during the holidays, it is a relevant and meaningful practice year-round. Gift-giving is not limited to presents under a tree during the winter month holidays. It is an ongoing part of how we show care, connection, and empathy in our daily lives. Whether it’s acknowledging someone’s grief, supporting their recovery, or respecting their personal circumstances, the intention behind a gift carries far more weight than the gift itself.

As we move forward, let us approach gift-giving with the awareness that our choices have the power to uplift or unintentionally harm. By fostering a culture of thoughtful, inclusive gifting, we can transform this tradition into one that brings joy, connection, and healing for all. This holiday season and beyond, let’s commit to gifts that reflect care, understanding, and respect. Whether big or small, material or experiential, a thoughtful gift can make a lasting impact on the lives of those we love.

Mindful gifting isn’t just a seasonal practice—it’s a lifelong commitment to inclusivity and compassion.

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5 Ways Working With A Recovery Coach Can Be Helpful

As you work through the challenges of your recovery journey, having a recovery coach can be a big help. A certified recovery coach is a trained professional who offers support, encouragement, and guidance to people recovering from substance use disorder. Here are 5 ways a recovery coach can help you during your recovery.

1. Personalized Support and Guidance

  • A Customized Approach: Recovery coaches work with you to create a personalized recovery plan that fits your specific needs and goals. They understand that everyone’s path to recovery is different, and so are their challenges. Coaches provide customized support, adjusting their approach to match your goals and situation. They believe you often know what works best for you and support you in following the path you choose for your recovery.

2. Enhanced Accountability

  • Regular Check-Ins: Recovery coaches often set up regular check-ins to keep you connected to reliable support. These check-ins help track your progress and, if you choose, hold you accountable for your goals. They also give you time to celebrate your achievements, talk about any challenges you’re facing, and prepare for upcoming obstacles. You get to decide how often the check-ins happen and how they take place—whether in person, virtually, through phone calls, or even texts. It’s all up to you.

3. Improved Coping Skills and Relapse Prevention

  • Relapse Prevention: One role of a recovery coach is to help with relapse prevention. According to a study by the National Institute on Drug Abuse, 40-60% of people in addiction recovery experience relapse. Because of this, having effective strategies to manage relapse is important. A recovery coach can help you identify triggers and create coping strategies. They work with you to recognize early warning signs of relapse and take steps to stay on track with your sobriety, if that is your goal.
  • Stress Management Techniques: Recovery coaches can help you explore different ways to cope with stress. For many people, stress is a trigger and can lead to cravings, so learning how to manage it is important.
  • Problem-Solving and Boundary-Setting Skills: Recovery coaches can also help you build problem-solving skills to overcome challenges and reduce the chances of relapse. Setting boundaries is another key part of recovery. Boundaries allow you to define what you will and won’t accept in your life. Learning to set healthy boundaries can empower you to focus on your needs and protect your well-being.

4. Increased Access to Resources

  • Connecting with Support Networks: Recovery coaches are familiar with many resources, including local and online support groups, harm reduction programs, treatment options, and other community services that can support your recovery.
  • Navigating the System: They can also help you navigate the often complicated healthcare system to access the services and support you need.

5. Reduced Isolation and Increased Social Connection

  • Building Relationships: Recovery coaches can help you develop healthy relationships with others in recovery, which can strengthen your support network and “recovery capital” or resources.
  • Community Engagement: They can connect you with community activities and volunteer opportunities, helping you feel a sense of belonging and purpose.

Working with a recovery coach can have many benefits and make a positive difference in your journey toward lasting recovery and well-being. If any of these sparked your interest, consider exploring the option of working with a coach for your recovery journey.

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Casey’s Story: Celebrating Fatherhood and Recovery

Casey Steckling is a licensed social worker and addiction counselor in southwest Ohio who is passionate about working with people in recovery at Emerge Recovery. It is a treatment center as well as a trade school to help men get on track in recovery and take back their lives with a step into the trade schools leading them to job and financial security. 

He is also a person in long-term recovery for the last eighteen years, as well as a father of three children. He says:

“My children have been a grace that came directly out of my recovery, as I was ten years sober when my daughter was born. It has been possible for me to have great patience when changing diapers, dealing with tantrums, having hard conversations, and teaching them respect for life, because I’ve been living on borrowed time.” 

In Casey’s words: 

I am a person in long-term recovery for the last eighteen years, as well as a father of three. My kids would not be here if it weren’t for my recovery. I have a seven-year-old daughter, a five-year-old son, and a two-year-old daughter, and I recently lost a son at 24 weeks. 

casey mic

My kids would not be here if it weren’t for my recovery. 

My children have been a grace that came directly as a result of my choosing to get well and seek sobriety. 

I was ten years sober when my daughter was born. It has been possible for me to have great patience when changing diapers, dealing with tantrums, having hard conversations, and teaching them respect for life, because I’ve been living on borrowed time. 

I recognize I should not be here, and by proxy, neither should they. Recovery has afforded me every moment, every day, and hour I’ve been allowed to spend with them. It has also given me a perspective of peace that I pray is injected into my daily conversations and the loving care that I provide for them. I value nothing more than God, my wife, my children, and the precious time that I’ve been given because I chose to abstain. 

I’ve worked as a recovery counselor and social worker for more than a decade now, and I’ve seen countless men who are trying to reconcile with their kids. Many of those men have done difficult things, have abandoned their families, or allowed their shame to chase them away from who God created them to be. If those men cannot present as a stable and helpful force in the lives of their children, those kids may continue the unhealthy cycle of addiction. 

The most beautiful gift about my fatherhood is that it is something everyone can relate to.

They either had a dad, or wished they had (a good one). That means that when I am advocating for recovery, I always mention my fatherhood. This is a perfect picture of what society supports when they help save the life of a person-in-recovery. They (and God) have given the world the gift of my children, because they supported my recovery. 

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Take it Out of the Circle: 

Here are a series of practical applications based on Casey’s story. Share in the comments below what moves you or ideas you have, too! The circle widens when you share your recovery, wisdom, and hope. 

  • Surround yourself with other men or individuals in recovery who model the kind of life you want to live. Mentorship can be a powerful force that shares hope with us and motivates us to keep going when things get tough.
  • Set boundaries. It is simple to jump into intimate relationships, sometimes toxic ones, early in recovery. Taking time to get to know ourselves in sobriety and become the kind of people we want to be with someday can pay dividends for the future.
  • Access supports that provide family-centric and holistic support. Ensuring care and treatment for our loved ones, including children, can be a great way to involve the whole family in the recovery process.
  • Share your story. Maybe you feel moved to share your recovery story in a visible way. Make a post on social media or submit a story for the Circle of Chairs blog. Giving others hope can also help us continue on the path of health and healing.
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Neurodiversity 101: 5 Essential Things To Know: Dr. Kiki Fehling

In recent years, there’s been a surge in conversations around neurodiversity. Many people are openly discussing autism, ADHD, neurodivergence, and neuroaffirmative therapy. But, in these conversations, many people are often confused about what these terms actually mean. In this article, you’ll learn 5 essential things to know about neurodiversity. Better understanding these topics can help you better support all of the people in your life, whether you or they are neurodivergent or neurotypical.

1. Neurodiversity includes everyone.

Neurodiversity is a term for the natural variability of human minds. Every single person has a unique neurotype, or way their brain is wired to think, feel, process, learn, communicate, and experience the world. People naturally vary in their neurotype, exactly as they naturally vary in the color of their skin, their sex, and other characteristics. 

While the concept of neurodiversity was originally coined and discussed among Autistic adults and activists in the 1990s, neurodiversity includes everyone. And, the neurodiversity framework—which views the variation and diversity of human neurotypes as natural and valuable—applies to everyone, whether they’re Autistic, otherwise neurodivergent, or neurotypical.

2. Neurodiversity is not the same as neurodivergence.

Some people are neurotypical, meaning their neurotype falls within what is considered “typical” and “neuronormative” in their culture. For example, a neurotypical person may talk, walk, and reach other developmental milestones at ages determined normative or “appropriate” by their doctors and teachers. They may easily socialize and communicate with most people. Generally, a neurotypical person’s thinking and functioning are similar to those of those around them.

In contrast, neurodivergent is a term used to describe a person whose neurotype lands somewhere outside what’s considered normative. Their thinking or functioning will notably differ in some (or many) ways from most people around them. Autism is one example of neurodivergence. When a group of people includes individuals with different neurotypes, that group can be called neurodiverse. Neurodiversity includes all neurotypes and all people, both neurotypical and neurodivergent.

3. Neurodivergence is not limited to being Autistic or ADHD.

In conversations about neurodiversity, many people mistakenly believe “neurodivergent” means autistic and/or ADHD specifically. But neurodivergence includes many other neurological experiences. For example, neurodivergent people may experience dyslexia (difficulties with reading or writing), aphantasia (inability to visualize things in your mind), prosopagnosia (impaired ability to recognize faces), or synesthesia (when one sense experience triggers an involuntary and simultaneous experience of another sense, such as seeing colors when you listen to music). Some people believe that psychiatric diagnoses are forms of neurodivergence as well.

Neurodivergent is an identity for anyone who thinks, perceives, feels, communicates, socializes, or otherwise functions differently than the neurotypical majority. Importantly, neurodivergent is an identity that someone claims for themself; it is not a psychiatric or medical diagnosis.

4. Neurodivergent people experience their neurodivergence differently.

The same way every person has a unique neurotype, as does every neurodivergent person. Everyone has unique strengths, difficulties, preferences, and lived experiences.

For example, Autistic people commonly have sense experiences that differ from neurotypical people’s sense experience. But, one Autistic person may feel hyper-sensitive to sound, becoming easily overwhelmed by noises around them, while another Autistic person may be hypo-sensitive to sound, seeking out loud noises as a way to self-regulate. Autistic professor and advocate Dr. Stephen Shore has said, “if you’ve met one person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism.” This idea captures the fact that even two Autistic people can experience the world very differently.

Neurodivergent people can differ in a variety of ways. A person can have more than one neurodivergent neurotype (sometimes called “multiply neurodivergent”). For example, a person can be both Autistic and ADHD (sometimes called “AuDHD”). A person can be allistic (non-Autistic) and still be neurodivergent. Some neurodivergent people also identify as disabled, and some do not. Recognizing and respecting this diversity is what makes the Neurodiversity Movement important.

5. The Neurodiversity Movement aims to create a world that’s affirming for everyone.

Many modern cultures assume and reward neurotypicality, while stigmatizing and pathologizing neurodivergence. Neurodivergent people may experience more mental health struggles because of these neuronormative expectations. They may unnecessarily suffer from shame or stress around parts of themselves that are natural. Neuronormative expectations harm everyone, not just neurodivergent people. Assuming everyone thinks and functions the same can impede communication, teamwork, and collective functioning.

The Neurodiversity Movement fights against the marginalization of neurodivergent people. It advocates that there is no such thing as a “normal” brain, and that neurodivergent people should not be treated as if they are inherently flawed or disordered. In fact, the natural variability in human minds is arguably helpful for our communities. People with different neurotypes bring different perspectives and strengths to our shared problems. 

Of course, people with different neurotypes will experience different limits, needs, pains, and struggles as well. This diversity is why mental healthcare practitioners are starting to think more about how to make therapy more neuroaffirmative and respectful of neurodiversity. How can we provide people with the professional help they need for their mental health struggles, without pathologizing or invalidating the lived experiences related to their natural neurotypes? This question is not just relevant for neurodivergent people. Neuroaffirmative healthcare offers every person, whether neurodivergent or neurotypical, the autonomy and support to make decisions for themselves about what a healthy, joyful, and meaningful life looks like for them.

The Neurodiversity Movement hopes to create a world where everyone would be offered more opportunities to thrive according to their natural abilities and preferences, and every person would be offered more accommodations or support to cope with the experiences of their neurotype that cause pain or difficulty. In these ways, a deeper understanding of and appreciation for neurodiversity benefits everyone.

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Navigating the Conversation: Talking to Your Boss About Mental Health Needs

Navigating the Conversation: Talking to Your Boss About Mental Health Needs

By Dr. Malasri Chaudhery-Malgeri 

In today’s high-stress work environments, mental health has catapulted to the forefront of workplace wellness discussions. Yet, many employees still hesitate to approach these conversations with their bosses, fearing stigma or professional repercussions. However, broaching this subject thoughtfully can enhance your well-being and professional performance. Here’s a nuanced guide on effectively communicating your need for support or time off for mental health reasons.

Setting the Stage

Preparation Is Key: Before setting a meeting, clarify what adjustments would help ease your mental burden. Are you looking to lighten your load, extend a few deadlines, hand off specific projects, or take some time off? Concrete solutions will guide the conversation.

Know Your Rights: Arm yourself with knowledge about your workplace policies and any relevant laws—like the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) in the U.S., which safeguards your position during extended leaves for health reasons. This preparation ensures you understand the boundaries and possibilities within your discussion.

Timing and Atmosphere

Choosing the Moment: Timing is everything. Opt for a moment when office rhythms are calm—perhaps a quiet morning or a slow afternoon. Avoid the crunch times, like the hectic end-of-quarter weeks, when stress levels are already high.

The Setting Matters: Privacy is paramount. A secluded spot, away from the hustle of office life, sets a tone of confidentiality and seriousness. A quiet conference room or a scheduled private office meeting can make a difference in how comfortably you can speak.

Crafting the Dialogue

Open Positively: Begin with a nod to the positive aspects of your role and the company. This shows your appreciation and frames the conversation as coming from someone invested in the company’s success.

Clarity and Honesty: Without delving into overly personal details, be clear about how your mental health impacts your work. Stick to specific examples and focus on the effects rather than the causes. Use “I” statements to keep the conversation personal and less accusatory.

Propose Smart Solutions: Bring potential solutions rather than presenting your problems alone. This could involve suggesting temporary help from colleagues, tweaking deadlines, or introducing new tools to improve your productivity without lowering the team’s output.

Highlighting Mutual Benefits

A Two-Way Street: Emphasize how supporting your mental health benefits you and the company. A healthier mindset can lead to sustained, even enhanced, productivity. It’s an investment with a valuable return.

The Preventative Approach: Stress the importance of tackling these issues to prevent more significant problems—this can minimize potential future disruptions.

Preparing for All Responses

Be Ready for Anything: While you hope for understanding and support, prepare for any outcome. If the response is less supportive, be ready to suggest a follow-up meeting after they’ve had time to consider your requests.

Plan B: If the conversation does not yield the hoped-for support, know where to turn next—perhaps HR can offer another pathway or external professional advice may be necessary.

What to Do If You Cry During a Conversation with Your Boss

Crying during a conversation with your boss, especially when discussing personal needs or challenges, can be an unexpectedly emotional experience. While it might feel awkward or uncomfortable, it’s important to remember that crying is a natural human response to stress, frustration, or even relief. Here’s how you can navigate this situation with professionalism and grace:

1. Acknowledge Your Emotions

If tears start to flow, acknowledge them without feeling ashamed. You can say, “I apologize, I’m just very passionate about this,” or “I didn’t expect to become this emotional.” Recognizing your tears helps to normalize the situation, showing that while you are emotionally affected, you are still in control of the conversation.

2. Take a Moment

Allow yourself a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts. You can ask for a brief pause, like saying, “Please bear with me for a moment while I gather my thoughts.” Use this time to take deep breaths and regain your composure. Deep breathing helps control your emotions and signals your body to calm down.

3. Maintain Your Composure

Once you’ve acknowledged your tears and taken a moment to breathe, try to continue the conversation. Maintain eye contact and keep your voice steady. If you feel overwhelmed, it’s perfectly acceptable to say, “I might need a moment, but I’d like to continue discussing this.” This demonstrates your commitment to the conversation and your professionalism.

4. Refocus on the Topic

Direct the conversation back to the main topic. Reiterate your key points or where you left off to demonstrate that, despite the emotional moment, your focus remains on addressing the issue at hand. For example, you can say, “To return to what I said earlier, I believe making these changes could improve my productivity.”

5. Use the Opportunity to Emphasize Your Point

Sometimes, showing emotion can underscore the seriousness of your statements. You can frame your emotional response as a demonstration of how much you care about your work and your commitment to performing well. For instance, “My reaction shows how important this is to me and how much I want to find a way to make this work for both of us.”

The Follow-Up

After the meeting, consider sending a follow-up email summarizing the discussion and expressing your thanks for the understanding shown during the conversation. This serves as a professional courtesy, reinforces your points in writing, and demonstrates your proactive approach to resolving workplace issues.

Crying is not a sign of professional weakness but reflects your sincerity and dedication. By handling the situation with poise and focus, you can move past the moment of vulnerability and continue to engage in meaningful dialogue with your boss.

Seal It with Gratitude

Follow up your conversation with a thank-you email outlining what was discussed and any agreed-upon steps. This shows your professionalism and provides a written record of your proactive approach.

Opening up about mental health in the workplace can seem daunting. Still, with the right preparation and approach, these conversations can significantly improve your work life and mental well-being. By framing your needs within the context of mutual benefits and coming prepared with solutions, you can foster a more understanding and supportive workplace culture.

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Embracing Emotional Tides: Navigating Our Feelings During Community Highs and Holiday Spirits

Imagine yourself at a bustling holiday market, enveloped by the joyful clamor of festive music and the aromatic scents of seasonal treats. Each step brings excitement mingled with a pang of overwhelm as the crowd thickens. This vibrant scene, pulsating with life, mirrors the complex dance of emotions within us—a dynamic blend of joy, nostalgia, and an occasional melancholy whisper. Acknowledging the richness of these feelings is the first step toward mastering our emotional landscapes during these spirited times.

Embrace the Full Spectrum of Your Emotions: Recognize Complex Emotions 

During a previous holiday gathering, I observed a friend’s demeanor shift subtly from merriment to introspection. Noticing the change, I invited her to step aside for a quiet moment. She shared that the festive atmosphere reminded her of loved ones no longer present, stirring a mix of joy and sadness within her. Our conversation on a secluded park bench, surrounded by laughter and lights from afar, became a profound exchange of understanding and connection.

This moment highlighted an important lesson: the holidays can stir a complex mix of joy and grief, and acknowledging this can be a significant step in emotional health. Here are some  strategies to effectively embrace and navigate your emotions. 

Cultivating Mindful Moments: Finding Peace Anytime, Anywhere

In the swirl of daily life, finding moments for mindfulness can offer a profound sense of peace and stability, helping you navigate through emotional ups and downs with clarity and calm. Whether it’s a busy weekday or a relaxed weekend, these practices can become a steadying force in your routine.

Starting Your Day with Mindfulness

Embrace the stillness of the morning as an ideal time for setting a mindful foundation for the day. Before the rush begins, take a few moments to breathe deeply, meditate, or set an intention. This can be as simple as a quiet reflection on what you are grateful for, or a more structured meditation focusing on your breathing, or a guided visualization. These practices help center your thoughts and ground your emotions, preparing you for the day ahead.

Mindfulness can be woven into the fabric of your daily activities, turning ordinary moments into opportunities for reflection and connection.

Benefits of Regular Mindfulness Practice

Regular mindfulness can significantly impact your well-being by reducing stress, enhancing focus, and improving emotional reactivity. It cultivates a greater awareness of your thoughts and feelings, helping you manage them more effectively rather than being led by them unconsciously. Furthermore, mindfulness can deepen relationships by making you more attuned and present with others.

By incorporating these mindful moments into your daily life, you create valuable pockets of peace that can enhance your mental clarity, emotional stability, and overall enjoyment of life. Whether through morning meditations, mindful walking, or simple breathing exercises, these practices empower you to live more fully in the present, enriching every moment of your day.

Crafting Realistic Expectations: Embracing the Beauty of Imperfection

The holiday season often conjures images of perfect gatherings, flawless decorations, and idyllic family interactions, primarily influenced by media portrayals and societal expectations. However, reality seldom aligns with these idealized visions, and this disparity can lead to unnecessary stress and disappointment. By crafting realistic expectations, we can embrace the inherent beauty of imperfection and find more profound satisfaction in our holiday experiences.

Recognizing Media vs. Reality

The first step in setting realistic expectations is to acknowledge the influence of media and commercial advertising in shaping our perceptions of what the holidays should look like. Television specials, movies, and social media often depict holiday celebrations as seamless and spectacular events, which can create a skewed benchmark for our gatherings. Recognizing these portrayals as curated and often unrealistic can help us set more attainable goals for our celebrations.

Valuing Authenticity Over Perfection

Through personal experiences, I appreciate that unexpected moments and minor mishaps often lead to the most cherished memories. A forgotten gift can become an impromptu game of charades, and a burnt pie might lead to an unplanned outing to a local café. These instances remind us that spontaneity can bring joy and that the essence of holiday gatherings lies in the quality of time spent together, not in the perfection of details.

Tips for Setting Realistic Expectations

1. Communicate Openly: Ensure communication with family and friends is open and honest during gatherings. Discuss plans and potential limitations openly so that everyone’s expectations can align more closely with reality.

2. Plan for Flexibility: While having a plan is helpful, it’s equally important to allow for flexibility. Accept that not everything will go as scheduled and that there might be last-minute changes or challenges. This mindset can reduce stress and make you more adaptable to unexpected situations.

3. Focus on What Truly Matters: Prioritize the aspects of the holidays that mean the most to you and your loved ones. Let these priorities guide your plans and expectations, whether it’s a unique family tradition, giving, or simply being together.

4. Embrace Simplicity: Consider scaling back to avoid over-preparation stress. A more straightforward meal, fewer decorations, or less elaborate gifts can enhance the enjoyment of the holiday by reducing the pressure on everyone involved.

5. Reflect on Past Holidays: Think back on previous holidays and identify what went well and what didn’t. Use these insights to adjust your expectations and plans. Often, it’s not the flawlessly executed holiday we remember most fondly, but the one filled with laughter and love, despite—or even because of—the imperfections.

The Rewards of Realistic Expectations

By setting realistic expectations, we mitigate disappointment and open ourselves up to the joys of authenticity. These adjusted expectations can lead to a more relaxed and enjoyable holiday experience for everyone involved. They allow us to celebrate the beauty of imperfection—where every overlooked detail, every deviation from the plan, adds color and character to our collective memories. In doing so, we remind ourselves and each other that it’s the shared experience, not the flawless execution, that truly defines the spirit of the season.

Dialogue with Compassion

In a memorable interaction last holiday season, I witnessed a friend address her young daughter’s overwhelming feelings with profound gentleness. Amid the festive chaos, she knelt, matched her daughter’s gaze, and said, “It seems like a lot right now, doesn’t it?” Her empathetic approach soothed her child and served as a powerful reminder of how compassionate communication can bridge emotional distances and foster understanding.

Enlist Support, Share the Load

The holiday season and significant community events are collective experiences; bearing their emotional weight need not be a solitary task. Share your feelings with trusted friends or family, or seek guidance from a mental health professional. This sharing of emotional burdens not only lightens your load but also strengthens the bonds of your support network.

Nurture Yourself: Creating Personal Sanctuaries for Emotional Balance

Amid our daily routines, particularly during busy seasons filled with heightened activities and responsibilities, prioritizing self-care is crucial. Nurturing yourself is not just about occasional indulgence; it’s about consistently incorporating practices that replenish your spirit and maintain your emotional balance. These personal sanctuaries provide essential respite and are foundational to sustaining well-being.

Identifying Restorative Activities

The first step in nurturing yourself is identifying what activities genuinely refresh and rejuvenate you. This will vary from person to person, as each of us draws energy and tranquility from different sources. For some, it might be the quiet contemplation in morning yoga, where focusing on breath and movement fosters mindfulness and calm. For others, it might be an evening walk under the stars, where the vastness of the night sky offers a profound sense of peace and perspective.

To discover what replenishes you, experiment with various activities and observe how each affects your mood and energy levels. Pay attention to what lifts your spirits, calms your mind, and makes you more centered. This could include:

  • Physical activities like yoga, tai chi, or gentle stretching help reduce stress and increase body awareness.
  • Creative outlets such as painting, writing, or playing music allow for self-expression and can be particularly therapeutic.
  • Nature engagements like gardening, hiking, or simply spending time in a park which can enhance your mood and connect you with a larger world outside your own.

Incorporating Activities Into Your Routine

Once you’ve identified the activities that nurture you, the next challenge is to weave them into your daily life. Here are some strategies to help make self-care a regular part of your routine:

1. Schedule It: Treat these activities as important appointments with yourself. Block out time in your calendar as you would for any crucial meeting or doctor’s appointment.

2. Set Reminders: Use technology to your advantage by setting reminders on your phone or computer to take breaks for your self-care activities.

3. Create Rituals: Build rituals around your self-care practices to make them more meaningful. For example, light a candle before you start your yoga session or prepare a favorite herbal tea to enjoy after your evening walk.

4. Be Flexible but Committed: While it’s important to incorporate these activities regularly, be flexible about when and how you engage in them based on your daily circumstances. The key is consistency, not perfection.

The Benefits of Regular Self-Care

Engaging regularly in activities that nurture your soul can benefit your mental and physical health.These practices help mitigate the effects of stress, enhance your mood, and improve your overall emotional resilience. They provide a refuge from the hustle and bustle, helping you to maintain equilibrium in your life. Over time, these personal sanctuaries can transform how you respond to daily challenges and significant life events.

By consciously making time to nurture yourself, you ensure your needs are met, even as you meet the world’s demands. This balance is essential for long-term happiness and vitality, enabling you to engage with life from a place of strength and renewed energy.

Choose Your Battles and Blessings: Investing Your Emotional Energy Wisely

In the ebb and flow of daily life, especially during eventful periods like the holidays, it becomes essential to make deliberate choices about where to invest our emotional energy. This means actively selecting which events and traditions to participate in based on how they resonate with our needs and values. Doing so empowers us to cultivate more fulfilling experiences and protect our well-being.

Making Conscious Choices

The key to investing your emotional energy wisely lies in differentiating between what truly enriches your life and what depletes it. This discernment allows you to prioritize activities that enhance your spirit and align with your more profound sense of purpose. It involves asking yourself: Does this activity bring me joy? Does it connect me with loved ones in a meaningful way? Does it reflect my values?

Empowering Yourself to Decline

Part of choosing wisely involves feeling empowered to say no to invitations that do not align with your emotional or spiritual needs. This can be challenging, especially when faced with expectations from friends, family, or colleagues. However, learning to decline politely is crucial for maintaining your mental health and ensuring your holiday season is spent in ways that are most meaningful to you.

Here are a few strategies to help in making these decisions:

1. Reflect Before You Respond: Give yourself time to think about an invitation before committing. Consider how you felt in similar situations and whether the event will likely be uplifting or draining.

2. Communicate Honestly and Kindly: When declining, express your appreciation for the invitation and explain your reasons if you feel comfortable doing so. Honesty helps others understand your choices and can strengthen relationships through mutual respect.

3. Propose Alternatives: If you decline an event but still want to connect with the host or other guests, suggest an alternative gathering that better suits your preferences. This shows that your decision isn’t personal against the individuals involved but about managing your energy levels.

The Rewards of Selective Engagement

By consciously choosing where to invest your emotional energy, you can significantly enhance the quality of your interactions and your overall holiday experience. This selective engagement prevents burnout and allows for more profound enjoyment and appreciation of the moments you choose to participate in. Each decision to engage or step back is an opportunity to align your actions more closely with who you are and what you need, leading to a richer, more authentic life experience.

Embracing this approach empowers you to enjoy the season’s blessings on your terms, turning potential stressors into opportunities for nourishment and joy.

Reflect and Realign: Learning from Experience to Enhance Well-being

The period following any busy or festive season offers a valuable opportunity for introspection and personal growth. Reflection is not just about reminiscing over past events; it’s a critical process that helps us understand our experiences, recognize patterns in our emotions, and make informed decisions about future engagements. This cycle of reflection and realignment is essential for continually improving our emotional health and ensuring that our activities align with our personal needs and values.

The Power of Reflective Practice

Engaging in reflective practice allows you to take stock of what has transpired, giving you space to appreciate what went well and identify what could be improved. This can be particularly insightful after holidays or major events, often with high expectations and varying degrees of emotional investment.

1. Journaling: One effective way to reflect is through journaling. Writing down your thoughts and feelings about different events and interactions can clarify what truly matters to you. It can also reveal emotional triggers or stress points that you might want to manage differently in the future.

2. Discussion: Sharing your experiences with friends, family, or a therapist can also provide insights and different perspectives. Sometimes, just voicing your feelings aloud helps to process them more fully and can lead to revelations that were not apparent when kept internal.

3. Meditation: Reflective meditation is another helpful tool. This involves sitting quietly, recalling various experiences, and observing your feelings without judgment. This practice can deepen your understanding of your emotional responses and help cultivate a more mindful, aware state.

Analyzing the Highs and Lows

As you reflect, categorize your experiences into what brought you joy and what posed challenges. Consider:

  • What activities did you find most fulfilling? Was it intimate gatherings, certain traditions, or quiet time spent alone? Recognizing these can help you prioritize similar experiences in the future.
  • What were the pain points? Were there particular events or interactions that drained your energy or caused stress? Understanding these can guide you to either avoid similar situations in the future or approach them differently.

Implementing Changes

Reflection is only as valuable as the actions it prompts. Use the insights from your reflective practice to make practical adjustments to your lifestyle and choices.

1. Prioritizing Joy: Aim to increase your engagement in proven, fulfilling activities. Make these a central part of planning for future events and daily routines.

2. Setting Boundaries: For the challenging elements, consider setting clearer boundaries. This might mean saying no more often, changing the nature of your participation, or altering the environments in which you engage.

3. Seeking Support: If specific challenges seem overwhelming, look for resources and support. This might involve professional help, such as counseling, or seeking out community groups to offer support and advice.

4. Adjusting Expectations: Often, dissatisfaction arises from mismatched expectations. If your reflections reveal a pattern of unrealistic expectations, work on adjusting these to align with reality and your capacity.

The Cycle of Continuous Improvement

Reflection and realignment should be viewed as an ongoing process, not just a post-event activity. By regularly assessing our experiences and adjusting our actions, we cultivate a more aligned life with our values and richer in satisfaction and emotional well-being. This ongoing cycle of learning and adapting ensures that each year, each event, and each interaction becomes an opportunity for growth and enhanced joy.

Navigating the emotional currents of the holiday season and community events is an opportunity to engage deeply with ourselves and others, fostering personal growth and meaningful connections. By embracing this vibrant emotional landscape with intention and care, we can transform potentially overwhelming experiences into enriching moments of joy and understanding. 

Let us step into these times with open hearts and minds, ready to embrace each moment with courage and grace.

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A Guide on How to Talk to Your Kids About Difficult Topics

Discussing complex topics with children, whether they pertain to violence, disasters, or other sensitive issues, is a daunting but necessary task. Effective communication can help children process their thoughts and emotions, ensuring they feel safe and heard.

Understanding the Importance of the Conversation

The rationale behind these discussions is multifaceted. Not only do they provide an opportunity to correct misinformation and clarify doubts, but they also help reinforce a child’s sense of safety and security in an unpredictable world. Additionally, openly addressing such issues can foster resilience, teaching children how to navigate life’s realities while feeling emotionally supported.

Preparing for the Conversation

1. Check-in with Yourself: Ensure you are emotionally stable before initiating any discussions on traumatic topics. Children are perceptive and can easily pick up on parental anxieties. Being calm and composed helps provide the reassurance they need.

2. Inform Yourself: Understand the facts about the specific issue. Being well-informed prepares you to answer questions factually and confidently, reducing fears driven by uncertainties and rumors.

3. Choose Your Moment: Timing is critical. Ensure the setting is private and quiet, free from interruptions, providing a safe space to express feelings and thoughts openly.

Engaging in the Conversation

1. Initiate with Open-Ended Questions: Explore what your child knows. Asking open-ended questions like, “What have you heard about this?” allows you to gauge their understanding and correct any misconceptions.

2. Provide Clear, Age-Appropriate Information: Tailor your explanations to your child’s age and maturity. While honesty is important, avoid overly detailed descriptions that might instill fear. Instead, focus on general safety and the support systems in place.

3. Validate and Reassure: Acknowledge and validate your child’s feelings. Whether scared, confused, or even curious, let them know their feelings are normal. Reassurance can come from emphasizing the safety measures and support available.

4. Emphasize Community and Support: Discuss how communities and support systems address these issues. Highlighting the roles of community leaders, teachers, and helpers in ensuring safety and providing support can reinforce a sense of security.

Continuing the Conversation

1. Encourage Ongoing Dialogue: Make it clear that this isn’t just a one-time conversation. Encourage your child to come to you anytime they have concerns or need to discuss anything that worries them.

2. Monitor Media Exposure: Keep a close watch on what your child is exposed to following such discussions. Continuous exposure to graphic content can be harmful. Encourage them to ask questions instead of seeking answers from potentially unreliable sources.

3. Watch for Behavioral Changes: Be vigilant for any signs of distress or changes in behavior, such as nightmares, avoidance behaviors, withdrawal from activities, or mood swings. Early identification of stress signals can lead to timely intervention, such as counseling or therapy.

Conclusion

Facilitating a conversation about complex topics with your child is never easy, but it is crucial for their emotional well-being and understanding of the world. You can help them navigate their feelings and foster a sense of safety by approaching the topic with care, honesty, and support. If you or your child need more support, consider contacting a professional who can provide tailored guidance and resources to help your family cope and heal.

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My Personal Recovery Story: Matt Glowiak

I’m Matt Glowiak, a loving father, husband, and man who was very fortunate to escape the clutches of addiction, which has been a common struggle for many loved ones as far back as I can remember and carries forward to this day. This is the story of how I narrowly escaped the clutches of addiction and built a life around helping others who struggle with mental health and addiction disorders. 

Beginning My Story 

Some of my earliest memories involve the mental health struggles my maternal grandmother faced. While I couldn’t make sense of them as a child, my earliest memories are polarized: either she was the funniest person in the room or the one who could become quite scary if she was in a bad mood. Regardless, I always knew I was loved. What I didn’t know, however, was what to expect each time we went over to visit. Would she welcome us with open arms, or would she slam the door and start screaming at us?

As I continued to age and mature, I started to recognize how others around her would respond. My grandfather was avoidant unless pushed to the point of confrontation. My mother would dissociate as though nothing happened. My oldest uncle would oftentimes act out in anger, screaming at her in front of everyone. My middle uncle would often show up in the most jovial mood I’ve ever seen of everyone to crash several minutes later, passed out on the floor. And my youngest uncle was the intellect who would attempt explaining to me what was happening, though I never really got it at that point. My grandmother never struggled with addiction, but her challenges ultimately led to some of her kin using to cope, with ultimately one of them dying before his time. 

On my father’s side, get-togethers were more stable, though there were many riffs in the family—so much so that I would not meet many more family members until adulthood when I personally made the choice to reach out and connect with them. My earliest talk with my father about substance abuse was around Age 15 when he told me, “Matt, there’s a difference between a beer guy and a booze guy. Don’t be the booze guy.” I didn’t really know what that meant at the time, but as I gained more life experience in college, best believe I figured it out, and in reading between the lines as well as piecing stories together over the years, I learned that many members of my father’s family also struggled with significant mental health and substance use disorders.

Then came me … As an undergraduate student at what was heralded a top party school in the early 2000s, I began experimenting with alcohol and other substances. I had a close core group of friends who I cherished dearly; however, they continued pushing the boundaries we set with use, and one by one I saw many of them drop out of school, fail out, get arrested, enter rehab, and experience a plethora of otherwise undesirable consequences that I told myself I would never experience for myself. Easier said than done, however … 

The Turning Point

Though I did not give it much thought at first, what ultimately came to scare me with my substance use during undergraduate was how much I loved the party life. Many times we were of the mentality that we would achieve a more euphoric state than the one prior. We were immortal in our early 20s, right? Of course that was wrong. 

I remember the time when I first really thought about what I was experiencing with the withdrawal and cravings and how it was at a point of barely being within my control. I could outsmart addiction, right? Then, I recalled a time when I was 14 years old. I was a star student, athlete, and member of numerous extracurricular activities. I needed to have a procedure where the physician froze warts on my feet. Gross, right? 

Well, what was even worse, which never connected until many years later, was how without even realizing what I was doing, I began abusing the liquid hydrocodone I was prescribed. Given my high tolerance for pain at the time but loving the way I felt, I skipped the morning dose and doubled down in the evening. 

This reflection and connection I had in sophomore year of undergraduate led to me feeling even more depressed than I was, as I was also failing classes (a new experience for me) and grieving a break-up with my high school girlfriend who cheated on me. I thought it would help to distance myself from my primary group a bit, begin associating with those who abstained from use of any kind, and hoped a spiritual connection to Buddhism would be enough to save me. It helped a bit in that I did have some further distance from use and cleared my head a bit; however, I always knew where the fun was and returned to it every chance I could. 

Climbing Toward Clarity

Fortunately, I wound up dating my best friend—who I had known since I was 11 and is now my wife—who, along with my other best friend, intervened with me my senior year. Best believe I was resistant at first and even did all I could to convince them to go out partying with me the same night. They held firm, stressed their point, and after that night, I never experimented with anything again. From there, I loosened the grip from the more potent substances but still found pleasure in drinking and smoking but with limits such as not using until the end of the day, during hazardous situations, et cetera as to minimize the risk of legal implications, overdose, or physical harm to self or others. 

After a couple years out of undergrad and knowing that I wanted to do something with my psychology degree, I enrolled in a mental health counseling master’s program online. My intention was to ultimately open a private practice, which I one day did. Admittedly, though graduate school was a motivating factor, it was also stressful, especially atop a 10-hour a day job that I found soul wrenching. Throughout, I would convince myself that drinking and smoking minimized my stress while making me even more insightful. In a way, it worked. At the same time, it was the wrong type of enforcement for someone teetering on a diagnosable addiction disorder. Even here, I keep my concerns in the background, as in many ways, I was achieving all the success I desired.

As I tell my clients and students now, sometimes your life’s calling finds you instead of the other way around. My masters internship wound up being at a site where I counseling court-mandated clients who received DUIs and other drug violations. After, my first full-time job as a counselor was at a methadone clinic. THAT was my wake-up call. At both my internship and the methadone clinic, client after client would give me the same excuses I gave myself for at least the past decade. There, I realized for certain that I was nothing special. I was like anyone else struggling. Further, I had the genetic predisposition. Much of what led to my clients coming to see me, I possessed as well.

They say that while in recovery one should focus on themselves only for the first year. After a year of success, focus on a plant. The next year, focus on a pet. And if all else goes well, you are ready for healthy human relationships. For me, the accountability to others really kept me in check. Though still not perfect, my entire perception and behaviors when it came to substance use changed. I had to live a better example for others, which ultimately helped myself.  

My Equilibrium and Closing Thoughts

As a youngster, I was raised with this negative view of addiction. While some of it came from my family as well as the church we attended, a lot of it came from the anti-drug campaigns they ran on TV. It appeared that most everyone addicted to drugs and alcohol was someone who didn’t care about theirself or others, had no regard for the law, and had no desire to stop. As someone who was mostly a straight-A student, in many prosocial activities, fairly popular, and from what I considered a healthy family dynamic (despite what I shared earlier); there was no way I could fall prey to addiction. Best believe, the only one I was outsmarting was myself.

Though I now have over a decade of experience as a clinician, professor, presenter, writer, advocate, and otherwise; I now know for certain that I am at risk. I hold firm boundaries, am open to constructive criticism, and continually remind myself that I am no different than anyone else struggling. The big difference is that I am fortunate to not only have woken up when I did but also having the positive support around me and now a career that keeps me accountable. 

The key to recovery, whether you are one who has gone through treatment or not (like me), it must be on the forefront of your mind to make it work. That is the key to life—being resilience while learning from your mistakes. It is true that it is not so much of what we have done or have had happen to us in the past that defines us as it is what we choose to do or not do with it. In my case, I am choosing to continue pushing forward while building my life around loving and helping other people. That is unwavering. 

Introduction to My Work and Passion for Mental Health

My work in mental health is quite diverse, as I love everything the field has to offer. I am a professor who teaches graduate level mental health and addiction counselors, a clinician who works with mental health and addictive disorders, a writer, a presenter, and perhaps most importantly, an advocate for prosocial change. While the path was not always linear, it seems as though the universe always had a way of guiding me in this direction. This is especially true when it comes to working with addictions. From my master’s internship, to the clients I worked with as a doctoral student, to my first full-time position in the field being a substance abuse counselor at a methadone clinic; the path found me. 

Since graduating with my doctorate in counselor education and supervision as well as masters in mental health counseling, I have built my life around not only helping others but improving myself. I do believe this is my life’s calling, and my intention is to help everyone else I meet find and follow theirs. While I cannot say that doing what I love feels like I never work a day in my life, as you can best believe I work nonstop, I can say that I finish every day—even the tough ones—feeling fulfilled. If I can do it, I know others can, too. 

Understanding the Stigma Around Addiction

While it is true that many people are focused on their health, a lesser spoken topic is mental health. Even lesser spoken is addiction. While there is so much stigma and misunderstanding around mental health, this is even more true with addiction. People are quick to personalize external challenges (e.g. institutionalized discrimination) while seeing personal flaws in individual hardship, the truth is that all of us go through challenges at one point or another in life. 

Addiction is the disease that knows no boundaries. Any person from any demographic can fall prey to addiction at any point in life. I have seen this both personally and professionally. Doctors, lawyers, police officers, firefighters, civic leaders, moms, dads, uncles, aunts, friends, loved ones, trusted colleagues—literally anyone—can fall prey at any time. The misconceptions that surround addiction leave many viewing it as a moral deficit when it is well within one’s control, when the truth couldn’t be more opposite. 

In the spirit of “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure,” there is so much more we need to be doing at a societal level to prevent addiction before it starts. A big part of the equation is speaking openly and honestly about the issue. Scare tactics and fabrications do the opposite, especially with our youth. When some uses and the only consequence is a good time, it immediately invalidates arguments aimed to discourage use. The truth is that, for many substances, they begin as an enjoyable experience for those who use, but for some who struggle to stop, the consequences become gravely catastrophic over time.  

Lessons Learned from Addressing Addiction in My Career

A lot of the work that needs to be done to combat addiction, going well beyond typical treatment protocol, is what happens beyond the couch, so-to-speak. For example, while working at the methadone clinic, where my clients were all diagnosed with opioid use disorder (many with co-occurring disorders), there was a common theme. Most every client who wound up using heroin began doing so because of prescription painkillers going wrong. Many began taking them as prescribed at first, but over time, tolerance built while withdrawal set in, and they found themselves using in increasing amounts to the point where prescribed medications were no longer enough. At this point, they were hooked.

Legislation at the time would immediately pin the fault on individuals they deemed were “doctor shopping.” While, yes, many individuals struggling with addiction do this to get their fix, it is part of the symptomology of addiction. On the other hand, prescribing physicians have access to a prescription monitoring program in which they can see every prescription, filled and unfilled, for anyone coming to see them. Where is the physician’s responsibility in this? As a medical professional who is obligated to do right by their patients, many were doing the wrong things. Accordingly, my clinic and I would attend legislative advocacy events as well as writing letters until the physicians were also held accountable.

Another issue we have is where police officers inappropriately manage mental health calls. We see this in the news all the time, and I have experienced it in my work, where individuals with significant mental health disturbances are treated like criminals instead of mentally ill individuals who need treatment. The consequences have been devastating to the point where people have been injured or even killed while being in the middle of a crisis. 

To combat this, having police social workers or counselors who can assist police officers with mental health calls can go a long way. In the community where I had my private practice, my partner and I joined local mental health coalitions where we would discuss ways to address the problem. Ultimately, the community ultimately received a $50,000 grant to pay a police social worker 1-year salary as a test-run. Fortunately, there was such a positive response that, moving forward, the position became a permanent one.

Sometimes the most seemingly complicated issues have the easiest solutions. You only know, though, by talking about it and seeing that talk into action. Many great things begin slowly but build over time. In many municipalities where physicians have become held accountable while police departments focus on mental health, we see neighboring communities ultimately follow suit. The only way to make it happen, though, is by acting. Counseling is much more than therapy but a philosophy that serves the human spirit. 

Advocating for Change: Solutions Rooted in Experience

A key part of advocacy is empowering the voices that otherwise go unheard. It is true that we live in an unjust society where many people’s needs go unmet. Even worse is how we blame them for their circumstances. Rather, we need to recognize the realities of genetic predisposition, institutionalized oppression, intergenerational trauma, environmental stressors, and otherwise. When we take a moment to hear people’s stories, we can empathize. 

Most often, we realize that those with the most undesirable of life circumstances are there because of the hand they were dealt. Even for those who, perhaps, continue making unhealthy decisions, there is a reason for it. Every person deserves a fair chance, and we have the opportunity and ability to give it to them.

Advocacy need not be a lofty thing in which all the world’s problems are resolved with the wave of a wand. Rather, it can begin with the simplest of actions. Having the conversation, writing a blog, educating yourself, asserting yourself to others, joining community activities, establishing your own organizations, volunteering time, and so much more are all steps in the right direction. Again, efforts continue to grow and build over time. 

Reflections and Call to Action: Building a Better Future

It is important to recognize how sometimes the greatest things come out of the most challenging of situations. Sometimes, it requires something horrible to happen for people to take action. While it would be more desirable for that not to be the case, unfortunately, it is. Given that there is a lot warranting our attention in the world right now, rather than become angry, depressed, or remain stuck; take the first step toward doing something.

Most everyone, whether they realize it or not, has been touched by addiction. It may be a friend, loved one, colleague, neighbor, or otherwise. These are people we love who are worth our efforts. Take a moment to think … If you were the one in a bad situation, would you not want others to act? I think the answer is a resounding “yes.” 

Currently, we are aware of what addiction is. It is a biopsychosocial disease. That is, it negatively impacts our physiology, thoughts and feelings, and interpersonal relationships. The disease is so invasive that simply stopping often feels as though one is struggling to fulfill their basic needs for survival. In some cases, it can be deadly. Rather than pass judgment, realize that no one ever wants to experience addiction. No matter how much I speak on the topic, I cannot stress this enough.

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What Is Gaslighting? A Guide to Recognizing and Healing from Emotional Manipulation: Matthew Glowiak

My name is Matt Glowiak, and I am a mental health and addictions counselor, professor, author, presenter, and advocate of positive social change. Though my pathway toward becoming a mental health professional was not necessarily linear, it was one that continually called to me throughout life, and here I find myself following my callings. Beyond working with clients in a clinical setting and teaching graduate level students, I find immense value in educating the public on mental health and addiction in a relatable manner that makes sense. The more the general population knows on these topics, the more quickly and effectively we may destigmatize mental health and addictive disorders. 

There is this common misconception that people only see a counselor when they are struggling with significant mental health or addiction issues. The truth, however, is that not everyone who comes to counseling has a true diagnosable condition. Given that all of us face challenges at one point or another, counseling can prove fruitful toward helping one understand oneself and others better, work through a temporary challenge, and so much more. One frequently occurring topic of discussion that is sometimes connected to a diagnosable condition and other times not is gaslighting. 

Understanding Gaslighting: Recognizing the Signs

Seemingly, there is a lot more literature available on gaslighting these days than in the past. Why is this? Well, I think the definition of the term provides a lot of insight into the why. Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to make a person doubt their own perceptions, memories, or reality. What makes this form of manipulation especially challenging to identify is that victims often feel as though they are the ones with the issue while potentially never discovering the true reality of what’s happening. It’s important to note that gaslighting does not necessarily indicate a diagnosable mental health disorder, though it can be a symptom of some diagnoses. 

Gaslighting often involves a manipulator denying facts, lying, or presenting false information to confuse or destabilize the victim. A common example in the workplace might entail an employee being reprimanded by upper-level management for poor performance in the workplace associated with a specific task. When the employee speaks to the directives provided by their direct supervisor, the supervisor might continually deny having made a decision or giving specific instructions, leading the employee to question their memory or competence. Ultimately, the employee takes the blame and truly feels remorseful.

Gaslighting is also a common feature in many toxic relationships. Consider an abusive relationship where one individual makes every attempt to control another out of their own insecurities. They might call names, behave erratically, threaten safety, and otherwise to continue getting what they want. When called out, however, the perpetrator will frequently belittle their partner’s feelings, suggesting they are overreacting or being too sensitive, which can diminish the victim’s self-esteem. Again, the victim blames themself. 

Two mental health disorders most associated with gaslighting include narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and borderline personality disorder (BPD). Individuals with NPD may engage in gaslighting to maintain control over their environment and to avoid responsibility. For example, a person with NPD might manipulate a partner into believing they are responsible for the narcissist’s unhappiness, creating a sense of guilt and confusion. In the case of BPD, symptoms associated with emotional instability might lead them to distort reality or project their feelings onto others, causing those around them to doubt their own perceptions.

Healing From Gaslighting

Whether gaslighting stems from a diagnosable mental health condition or not, the consequences for the victim are similar. This behavior can lead to significant emotional distress and can be a form of emotional abuse. When addressing gaslighting, it’s important to utilize approaches most appropriate for victims as well as perpetrators. In my experience, I have worked with both. 

For victims of gaslighting, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps victims understand and reframe distorted thoughts and beliefs, empowering them to reclaim their sense of reality. Support groups provide the opportunity to connect with others who have experienced similar situations and can provide validation and support. Assertiveness training can help victims to express their feelings and needs more effectively, reinforcing their sense of worth and reality.

For perpetrators of gaslighting, engaging in individual therapy, particularly with a focus on understanding the underlying reasons for their behavior, can be crucial. Therapies such as Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) may be beneficial, especially for those with personality disorders (i.e., NPD & BDP). With communication skills training, learning healthy communication strategies can help perpetrators understand the impact of their words and behaviors on others. Working to develop empathy can also assist individuals in recognizing and addressing their harmful behaviors.

In both cases, fostering a safe, supportive environment is key to healing and change. This is especially poignant while working with couples and families. Here, the counselor serves as a facilitator who guides the conversation, ensuring that the dialogue is respectful and that each party has their voice heard without disruption. In more severe cases, potentially where safety is threatened, it is most appropriate to begin with each party individually to help them arrive at a better place personally before beginning their work collectively. 

Helping Clients Overcome The Effects of Gaslighting

Admittedly, working with victims or perpetrators of gaslighting is challenging. For the victim, sometimes the effect of gaslighting is so glaringly obvious that it can be frustrating when your client does not connect the dots despite all the evidence pointing in that direction. On the end of the perpetrator, especially when they are aware of what they are doing and express no empathy, you sometimes feel as though there is no end in sight. Hence, patience can be a virtue while remaining objective is a must. 

In either case, it’s important to stick to the facts. As a counselor, I always meet my clients where they are, regardless of where that place might be. It is important to remain empathic, as on either end, there is a reason why some continually accept or commit such behavior. Being accusatory often leads to denial, frustration, or otherwise negative feelings that compromise treatment. Accordingly, I listen, guide, educate, reflect what the client says, and grasp onto key insights revealed while helping clients make further sense of them. The further we journey down this pathway, the more we find that ties it all together, and when we arrive at the origins of the behavior, we can truly get to meaningful work where progress occurs. 

As one who practices a lot of CBT, I like to help clients arrive at ample awareness of their thoughts, behaviors, emotions, and how they all connect. Physiological sensations are also appropriate for assessment here. What I love about CBT is that it ultimately teaches clients a new way. Some of the benefits include but are not limited to identifying distorted thoughts, reframing negative beliefs, building self-esteem, developing coping strategies, improving emotional regulation, and enhancing problem-solving skills (among others). Ultimately, this form of therapy is empowering. When aware, one may recognize what is happening in any given moment, take a step back, acknowledge it for what it is, and respond in a more appropriate manner.

Though I more commonly use DBT with individuals diagnosed with NPD or BPD, many of its interventions are helpful with so much more, including gaslighting. Mindfulness is a key feature of DBT. Mindfulness skills in DBT encourage individuals to stay present and aware of their thoughts and feelings without judgment. This can help those affected by gaslighting to recognize when their perception is being challenged and to validate their experiences, reducing self-doubt. Given that DBT is a modified version of CBT, they do share similar qualities in how they help clients. With DBT, clients may come to benefit from heightened emotional regulation, interpersonal effectiveness, distress tolerance, validation, and building self-compassion.

Perhaps one of the more interesting challenges as a counselor working with gaslighting is when perpetrators try gaslighting you. Every time this happens, I call it out. Though I may receive some pushback, I remain firm. Here, the client quickly learns their manipulation will not work on everyone. The clinical setting and interactions had with clients are meant to represent the real world. If I give into the gaslighting and the client feels successful, the cycle continues. Accordingly, with everything I do—serving the perpetrator or victim—the intent is to break the cycle. 

Closing Thoughts and Future Initiatives

Although the term “gaslighting” did not become more popular until the mid-2010s, it became such a hot topic that Merriam-Webster named it its word of the year in 2022. This is telling. After learning about gaslighting and what it is, so many people felt impacted by it that they began researching it further. I mean, here I am even writing about it right now. That said, this behavior is more common than one might think.

As I continue saying, everything begins with awareness. Now that the general population has become more familiar with the term, and likely will continue becoming more familiar moving forward. On the other end, for those who commit this behavior seemingly outside of their control but want to have healthier relationships, they might be more inclined to seek their own help. With both victims and perpetrators seeking help, the condition may continue to improve over time. 

We would be remiss, however, not to consider gaslighting on a larger societal—or even global—scale. There are numerous individuals in leadership and other high-ranking positions who use gaslighting as a strategy to gain power. This is why it is imperative that people do their research. Misinformation, disinformation, and otherwise all contribute to this phenomenon. When something doesn’t feel right, trust your gut. Most often, you are likely right. Do your research, seek support if needed, and never forget that everything begins with awareness.